Give Me a Reason

[Dandragon]

Give me a reason

And a good one, too

To live in this world

With all of you

Where I watch people prosper

And succeed by doing less

While I'm pressured and pushed

To do my very best

Where expectations rise

And take hold of my life

Where I feel it pierce

My will with its knife

Where I'm told "It get's better"

Even though it's a lie

And all I can do

Is sit back and cry

Where I have no strength

To continue onward

And they look at my form

And call me a coward

Where depression is an ocean

And I'm being dragged down

Where everyone can breathe

And all I do is drown

So give me a reason

To keep going with this pain

To stay in this world

That drives me insane

Give me a reason that I should live

Feedback is appreciated

[Parrhesia]

Poetry isn't my forte, so I might be... well, wrong, but;

Give me a reason

And a good one, too

Where I'm told "It get's better"

Where I have no strength

To continue onward

And they look at my form

And call me a coward

1) The second line just seems... very off, like it could be improved. Has a very 'casual aside' tone for an angsty poem.

2) Grammatical error. Should be 'gets'.

3) Stands out as by a fair margin the weakest verse in the poem. Particularly the second half - onward and coward just don't seem right to me, and according to the qualified opinion I hit up on Skype don't actually rhyme at all.

Other than that it's solid enough, but again, I'm not much of a judge.

[Dragoncat]

Looks like a decent enough poem. Can't really say much that Parrhesia hasn't said, but onward and coward arent that big of a deal imo. Poetry doesnt always have to rhyme, but then again, if you rhyme everything else I guess it would sound off.

[Parrhesia]

Well yeah it doesn't have to rhyme, just that close to everything else in the poem does, so it stands out.