Let's Play Fire Emblem Monshou no Nazo

[Maji]

Did you kill off all the neutral enemy units that don't attack on their own anymore after you got Ellerean recruited for easy EXP?

Most likely, destroying everything in the way while Marth wanders to the throne is the way I swing! I may have spared some, but that would most likely be because Marth seized.

Welp, no more worrying about homework for another month, I'll just let procrastination auto-pilot my History paper. 8)

I celebrate me surviving the infamous due week where all the profs make EVERYTHING due in the same week by updating.

Book 2- Chapter 11: Last Desert Chapter in FE3, Yessssss!

In case SNES storyline and expectancy to remember trivial locations visited for one who chapter, never to be discussed again, Thebes is the city that Lolnef was hiding in Book 1 with Ellis. Remember when Marich punched him in the dick with cancerous explosive light? Good times...

Yup, this being the first FE to bring about the awful turn count raping tradition of horror. Worst being if not a Thief, the chances of getting an item = LCK, so if you have 5 LCK = 5% of getting the item, woo..

Much like any other desert with shit in it, it's a large enough map to make FE4 shit itself.

Not all the treasure? Sure, why not?

Except if you teleport in and out.

Notice three things here:

I guess Axefighter's non promotion brothers? Not much of a problem, they can be stabbed in the dick with a Lady Sword for lulzy damage.

Now, these are the problem, most likely will give you nightmares, 16 Mt, and 12 Mov, 12! That's like half a map in one go! Now take in the fact that some maps they swarm, and Malliesia is out there, and... yeah.

And the one unique (and only time he ever appears in FE3) sprite is no other than Link! No longer does one need three pendants and a trip to the Lost Woods to snatch the Master Sword, as we're going to nab it off Link's corpse!

Sadly, no it does not shoot lasers upon full health, in truth, it's like a Kill Sword on steroids.

There's blazing hot deserts in the northern hemisphere of Akaneia, just saying.

Anri's Blog posted:

o god, the desert, it's hot, i hate everything!!!!!! there's a bunch of mountain men with axes walking around with dragons, everything sucks, my hairspray is totally not working either, i hate everyone.

-a "</3" is drawn here-

OMG michael was my lab partner in biology, but i don't even think he notices me. and there's no more ice cream for me to angst nosh, the world is awful.

Fun fact: the shrine that the Falchion was originally in is on the other side of the world, taking the long way is manly, I guess?

Thebes Tower is the place where notBowser goes to stash various notPrincess Peaches throughout history in Akaneia, see.

But battle! This fight consists of Paola cock teasing the Flying Dragons with a Javelin, and someone else killing the Dragon, whilst she flies off to help someone else being pestered by a Dragon. Minerva and Linda help sometimes, but Paola is the bulk of this fight. Marth sneaks on over to the throne while Paola protects him from scary things and no one else even moves besides Malliesia who flings her Reblow staff at Paola constantly.

To make your life totally awful, IS threw in a couple of bow users to mess with Paola, but they apparently forgot that the Iote Shield is obtained in Chapter 3.

Welp Doga, last time I use you in FE3.

Also, I forgot to mention this, but for some reason, FE3 puts "Wait" as the first command, so if you like pressing the confirm button before thinking, then.. you wasted a turn! Nice IS, real nice..

Guess who's going to be at like Lv. 500 by the end of these three chapters?

La la la~-

OH GOD!

I know, when I end up inevitably wandering in a desert full of hostile angry men with axes and dragons sometime in my life, I'm going to be sure to be friends with a totally hot chick on a dragon before doing so.

Also, give your Mages Def increasing Star Orbs, the results are lulzy, more on that later.

To add on to the OH GOD-ness of flying dragons, their attack nullifies Def, so you'll be taking that 16 DMG like a boss. Fortunately, 51% is meh in the grand scale of things, and most of the time, Paola dodges or shrugs the first two attacks off.

And I'm boring, so no awesome SSB-esque duel between Marth and the holder of the Master Sword, just select a Thunder tome that can double and almost guarantee a critical somewhere in there and...

Psst, his armour is green, and his hair is semi-blonde. =o

Zelda can wait, we already have half a billion princess to rescue!

Once Paola finishes her job, we leave her up to finding the items with a delicious 12% to unearth them because I sure as hell don't want to spend ~50 turns on a map navigating Julian and Ricardo to find these.

Three levels into her promotion, and she's almost capped everything, you're on my A-Okay list Paola! We give her the Goddess statue so her odds of finding things can increase by at least a little.

But enough of this fun stuff, let's dive back into plot and Marth asking a billion questions!

Fun fact: she was supposed to be with Banutu at the end of Book 1?

In all fairness, "Goes away with Banutu to a distant village" isn't exactly helpful in your contact page...

Anyway, hey Marth made a statement for onc- OH GOD, LITTLE GIRL INNOCENCE SAYING SUGGESTIVE THINGS WITHOUT THEM KNOWING IT'S SUGGESTIVE, WHY JAPAN, WHYYYYYYY?!

And.. Chainey demorphs from Chiki who needs to be facing a person to morph into them mind you, sure, why not?

Navigating a desert full of dragons isn't really something that would make someone beaming with smiles in all honesty.

And because it's from Gato, the order to be too lazy to help was specific.

Plot reasons to introduce you in a mysterious way mainly, but also because Gato ditched all his pupils one day, so you're the only person who has contact with him.

Marth likes his girls in all forms -creepy wink-

I'm sure that'll be introduced in a single sentence later on, only for Marth to ask again five chapters after that, and the chapter after that.

-And tune in for the most boringist part story-wise in FE3 where I combine two chapters because I cut most of the dialogue out thanks to rehash-mania!-

[30425.com]

So you didn't bother with finding all the items in this chapter in the long run then? Also brace yourselves for the most annoying Dragon-based chapter in this one, or at least the start of it is.

[Maji]

Aight, I figure I should probably update this, WEEK LONG BREAK, YEAAAAAAAAH!

Book 2- Chapter 12: Where Marth Mashed Start And Skipped the Prologue and Book I

And here we are kids, the two chapters in FE3!B2 that serve purely as gameplay filler for this game. With the addition of the earlier statement, these chapters also serve as plot rehash to either remind the player of Mediuth and Anri's back stories for the billionth time, or for those lazy pricks who skipped Book 1 and went on to Book 2, which is none of you guys, ...I hope. So to save tedium of SNES lolplot, I'm cutting all the rehash out which will leave us with probably 40-60% dialogue to work with.

I don't even care about the geographical location of where they are anymore, while going east from Thebes would be a lot less time consuming and less going into the apparent not ocean, I'll just let Akaneian men do what they want.

While all the Pegasus Knights just flew over all that crap like pricks. I however, do feel sorry for Social Knights for having to pick their horses up and hike up shear walls.

It wouldn't be effecient to burn through a Blizzard tome to shut everyone up about the heat.

That's no mountain at all... y'know, going skiing off the mighty Akaneian mountains, you take a detour, and you end up flying right into a river of magma!

Hint: That "roaring" sound is in reality, Flying Dragons, fearful indeed.

This chapter, albeit filler is enjoyable to at least some extent. Although there are like six Flying Dragons with bladders full of piss just waiting to unload in your Corn Flakes, they're nothing Paola and Minerva can't handle. Also, note that the fighting space is cramped, choke points are a-go here.

The enemies are just about the same as earlier, only replace those trivial Hunters with Fire Dragons, and you got yourself one magma-y mountain!

Hence all the Fire Dragons who are totally not in graves to our dismay.

This goes on to be a theme later on, so do add this word to your repitoire kids!

Which equals for them not having to waste a turn turning into a dragon, as they're transformed from the start, and don't ever revert, fantastic.

Rehash! Originally heard from Morodof in B1!Ch.6:

Basically they were all happy, humans lived here, they lived wherever they lived (i.e- away from humans) then God decided to dick punch the dragons for no apparent reason at all and if they didn't seal their forms inside stones, they'd degenerate (or flip tits and destroy things forever)

It was nice of the Flying Dragons to patiently wait while Chainy info-dumped already known information on Marth though!

You can't mount until you get to the cracked part of the bridge, hopefully all your mounts are at top of the vanguard!

Also, Chainy doesn't join this chapter despite being with us, what a chump.

This is NOT a chapter to piss around around spawn base, as reinforcement forts are right there, so you can either cover those and play this chapter defensively, which is a whole new definition of tedium, or just run as fast as you can and pray to Vishnu that the Fire Dragons don't breathe too much fire at your squishy units.

By following FE3 and 5 laws, reinforcements come out arbitrary, sometimes three Fire Dragons come, sometimes one Barbarian comes out, and there's also a chokepoint conveniently there if you're feeling the need to grind a single strong 1~2 RG unit.

Also, because Flying Dragons are technically fliers, Ryan has the advantage, coupled with Partia, he enjoys this chapter immensely.

Feena can do that as well for some easy Archer love.

Most people just get Julian to walk across the dragon filled map and get what I'm about to get, but with five uses, and easy EXP, the treasures that required this staff have already been gotten, so why not give her some EXP? God knows she desperately needs it.

By this point, the player should check to see if they have twelve of these, if not, they're fucked!

Sixteen DEF! Which means she'll laugh at everything, and kill everything thanks to the typical FE law of enemies not having the word "RES" in their dictionaries.

Ryan also LOVES this chapter thanks to stealing kills like a hoodlum, and every Dragons auto 99 EXP/Partia kill.

After a not so climatic fight of Paola saving a lot of ass, and Malliesia proving her worth of a staff bot, we get through this boss-less stage!

Guess where we're going next, and guess where the final chapter is going to be based?

So, basically exactly where Durhua is (or was), but because we didn't get time to sightsee back in the glorious Book 1 days, we didn't get to see where all the pretty degenerated Dragons were sleeping over there.

FE3B2 Shits all over Book 1 moment:

A single Earth Dragon caused everything in Book 1, now we discover that there are hundreds of them, take that Book 1!

-Chainy then goes on to tell Marth of another time the Earth Dragons kicked the humans asses before Mediuth did with Anri/Marth a few years ago.-

And this shield, as told by Jeigan in B1Ch19 keeps these dragons sleeping, but because HUMANS stole the shield, the world is starting to go to shit.

Narga is a classy dragon you see, he bites dragons as opposed to breathe of them like every other dragon in this game does.

In the end, ripping your own yellowed (or golden?) canine out of your 5,000 year old mouth really doesn't benefit and this ends our favourite fab dragon.

At least someone will then go on to write a book about him so vivid that it shoots him out of it, and adds +20 to a shit tonne of stats!

Which we learn later to our absolute agony in dismay, is total BS.

"is still faithfully follow his orders"

On that note: Gato is 5,000 years old now, wat?

But is too lazy to partake in ass kickery, dragon breathing, so he just pretends to use magic and tell Marth to do things.

DUN DUN- you're too dumb Marth.

At least Chainy's got the right idea, if it was me, I would have made up an excuse to escape Marth's barrage of questions earlier.

This took longer than I expected, so these chapters will remain divided for better or for worse.

You decide yourself when we continue exactly this in Filler Emblem: Morestory no Newcontent, with ice this time, and maybe a whole new class if you're lucky!

[Maji]

Oh hey, another update! Boredom can be a powerful ally when it comes to getting things done!

Book 2- Chapter 13: I Think I Promoted Too Early

Welp, that does it! When I venture into Akaneia, I definitely want to be either a chick with wings, or Mishiel. Speaking of him, how did he get to pursue the Dragon Knight class? There's no reclass yet, and the only way of being a DK is first being a PK.

Makes me wonder of the legitimacy of this story itself if Jeigan can't even get the numbers right.

It was mighty nice of Hardin to suspend his reign of terror while Marth and co. spend days (weeks? Months?) climbing up 5,000 feet of mountain.

Yet they're perfectly capible of fighting, especially Linda with her loin cloth in a GOD DAMN MOUNTAIN SUMMIT!

Pallet swap ahoy! Although I give IS for at least putting some effort in these two levels design, gives the player motivation to continue.

Rehash! Exactly what was said in the map scene.

This is before FE11 when crossdressing avatars of an apparently deceased god were a-go, see?

Let's just.. not converse about your natural skill with a sword without having to morph into someone who does have skill.

Rehash! Perpetuating that humans are dicks for stealing the Shield of Seals, and walking around like they own the place. From everything and also from every other video game in existance.

What dickery!

Rehash! Mediuth's story for the millionth time (430,000 if you don't count Book 1 or the Prologue)

Ice Dragons! They're pretty underwhelming by the by.

So... this is basically a picture that sums up this chapter, IS forgot that Marth can cross water, and that two overpowered women have wings to protect Marth. I'm sure someone did cross the recommended path like a chump, but I find giving Marth and Julian Dragon Killer swords, and having Paola and Minerva protect them to work just as well, better if you include turn count wise.

However, Julian goes on a detour to pick up the greatest item in this game. This time, it goes to Marth, and from drafting, a Marth that can move far can save a lot of tedium.

Dead serious, that's all there is to this chapter, I would argue if done in an offensive Paola lol way, this is one of the easiest chapters in this game.

The think that looks like a pink tentacle coming out of the ground on the left is an Ice Dragon by the way. They're basically like Fire Dragons, only with lower HP, but beefier ATK, DEF and RES in particular and they ignore terrain and shoot... you guessed it, ice!

Really Gato? After going through the Hardin, whyyyyyyyy? phase, learning of the true functions of the orbs would be a simple "oh, okay". Then again, we're talking Marth, telling him that you can open a can of Coke by pulling the tab off would send him to the hospital for shock treatment for days.

Gasp!

FE3 has some pretty ridiculous reasons to postpone plot development.

Which needs to be reminded that HUMANS stole the orbs and the shield.

Hence Gato's orb fetish, 600 years later, and he found.. three out of five orbs!

So much for divine dragons only being able to enter there, eh? We also disproved this last book as well.

Sadly, being a game of the 1990s, plot wasn't there, so no, Hardin didn't stub his toe one day and said "fuck it, everyone's going to die" or anything to that level of badass, he just simply got possessed.

Convenience will play a crucial role with the finding on this one, guaranteed.

Fun fact: he's going to sit in the same tile next chapter, and find his way to the bench the chapter after that.

Next chapter: dickery on IS's behalf, being thankful that I gave the Boots to Marth, orbs ahoy and we also get the greatest endgame trivializing staff in the history of FE!

[Shin]

Great stuff, I should really update Let's Rage at some point.

[Maji]

Uggghghghghghg, y u 50 img only, SF?

So I had to cut out like 80% of the map scene, but most of it is "oh, oh Chiki, your life is so fucked, oh, oh Chiki, you should be crying forever, oh oh Chiki Chiki Chiki..."

Book 2- Chapter 14: Haha, Good Try Dragons, Go Back to Being Secondary Foes

Oh, and last chapter, did I mention that Garnef came back from the black holes of the Eagle Nebulae to give Hardin that orb? That fucker. Anyway...

But his suprisement scene is off camera, as the large, unfathomable files of text and other unrelated questions directed Chainy's way (some inevitably questions about events that took place two seconds ago) is just too big to host on a SNES ROM.

Somehow, the Shield of Seals* keeps her sanity- which she was totally fine with it not complete in Book 1 mind you, opposed to her dragon stone like all the other Mamkutes out there.

* Which I will call S.o.S from now on because it's too bitchy to spell that out 24/7

Ice Dragons! Send in your high AVD sword units, they'll 2 RG the shit out of you, send in your Mages, they'll show you the definition of squishy in a fantastical blizzard scene. I dislike this chapter greatly. That's not even the half of it!

"No Mount"

I'm not done yet!

See all those Thieves?

No, there's nothing that they can get to before you, BUT:

With "--" for LCK, this somehow rounds their odds of being struck with the Devil Sword to 0%, meaning that the Devil Sword is just an ordinary sword for them, and you'll be biting 23 DMG most of the time thanks to the Thieves's high hit rate.

You know how I say Marth likes to ask unrelated questions?

...Duke Cartas, we hear his name like once in a split second in some map scene, think "oh, I'll never hear his name again", forget about his name, his name then comes back a dozen chapters later and becomes a main part of the plot, typical FE3!

Marth- a noble who doesn't know that nobility can't marry former peasants (Anri in this case)!

And therefore never has kids, and whenever Marth says he's a descendent of Anri, he is therefore lying.

And he goes on to have kids, Marth is a descendant of Anri's brother, not Anri.

...

Back the fuck up! Say I were to go on to save the world, and my brother sits at home all day and eats Cheetos all day. To say you're a descendant of me is pure BS, you're a descendant of a lazy Cheeto eating slob, not me.

I like to handle this chapter by placing someone with high AVD to cocktease the Ice Dragons, and snipe the ones off to the side with people with 2 RG. Granted, the high AVD part is down to luck, better be thankful it's at the beginning, so rageresets can be performed. awesomeface.jpg (I had to cut the actual SF emoticon out to save IMG space)

There are definite positivities to obtaining the Hammerene in Ch. 5, and Partia in Ch. 8! I have this feeling that although Paola is the frontier slaughterer, Ryan's still going to 20/20 before her.

The Ice Palace is equiped with one of those fancy 21st Century automatic opening doors, but because Gato is in charge, natually it's a magical fancy 21st Century automatic opening door that only opens with Marth and no one else.

There's also three of these doors and they're spread out across the chapter. See why giving Marth the Boots cuts down on tedium?

Next turn:

NO, IT'S NOT ANRI, I JUST WENT THROUGH THIS TWO MINUTES AGO!

ARGGGHHGHLJDSAFKASLKGHASLKFLSAKDHFALKWHFLASDKJFAS! -fistshake-

For all the cancelling of enemy terrain underwhelming glory one can hope for.

And it's required to beat the game, so why not?

How one ended up in a treasure box across the world in a fiery oubliette? Beyond me, but yayyy, Star Orb, 30% all stats to the holder!

Aww, no more shards for lulzy stat distrubting for everyone. :(

Marth is a walking shield? Sure, why not? His DEF doesn't really vouch for that, but plot is plot!

Oh! OH! Right!

Marth notices all these things and asks about them in like ten different ways throughout this game, you'd think he would've asked about the five big gaping holes on his mini shield (see: the tini brooch he uses to pin his cape which is somehow supposed to function as a shield).

And not the shield which could probably be sold for more, but eh, I don't know the trade in Akaneia, so a brick of solid gold from god could be as much as a grain of salt over there for all I know.

Because we're talking Akaneia, there's only two humans who ever commanded an entire army, Marth and...

Nina's ancestor (Duke Cartas)! Who kept the shield because it looked nice with five gaping holes in it, I guess.

A stolen good obtained in a riot? Because that's just the definition of regal, Cartas.

Rehash! Exactly what was just said.

Also, putting two and two together, The Curse of the Fire Emblem comes from Cartas stealing it.

Can you guess what the second half of the game will be about when Hardin isn't being a dramatic dick?

B2 shits all over B1 again:

There are now THOUSANDS of Earth Dragons, you're just looking smaller and smaller by the moment, Mediuth.

She went from not needing the S.o.S to be sane in Book 1, to needing it in two chapters and back to not needing it, oh you, FE3!

We also apparently have to fight pluralized Book 1 final bosses later on.

Aaaaand back to needing it!

You have to love Marth's statements, he's such a crucial figure to this game, always helping advance the plot and whatnot. The pinnicle of his character right here!

Yes, Marth can move that far with the Boots, give him them!

Pictured: Chiki on a Saturday morning after a night of-.

Good morning to you too, Miss Sunshine!

I guess not even dragons can sleep for 600 years straight, they got to get up every now and then for a glass of water.

Kids just grow out of their cute stage too quickly these days..

If I find any MCR garbage or anything like that in your room young lady, you're out of this house!

Ah, there we go, can't be consistent with character all the time, now can we?

Chiki has better join time this time, better base stats and has 2x against dragons, she will function as a third flier to the team.

Granted, her SPD is still abysmal, Mamkutes can't double anyway, and we don't plan on dropping her in an open pit of enemies soon anyway and expect her to survive.

That's Paola's job

Get this: it's a sword, but it kills swords! (Mercs and Heroes) Granted, every enemy human dies in two hits with a low tier weapon anyway, it's still amusing to give to someone and watch them just totally rip a Merc up every now and then.

I know, IS is so obvious.

Degenerating, dragons? Well, lovely Anna here has a solution to that as well as shits all over the plot: you can now buy your own sanity in four delicious new flavours!

Gosh, this was a long chapter. It's not over yet though~

Meet the biggest way to cheese the game forever: it lets THE ENTIRE ARMY MOVE AGAIN. Problem with fighting 20 reinforcement units at once after crossing the trigger point? Well, give your Marth a pair of boots, kill the boss with Paola, cross half the map, Again Staff, cross the other half and no fighting reinforcements! Granted, there's only three uses, we'll need one use to get by the worst part in this game.

This will also make the final boss a lol.

The other treasure is a Talisman, we give it to Linda because she's going to love tanking both physicially and magically.

Gato then becomes the greatest person ever, I wish I kept track of his magic in B2. :(

You're starting to get on my shit list, Citan Uzuki. That's how many bosses you ducked out of? (Curtesy: The Dark ID)

Oops, wrong game.

Pay attention to the plot, Marth, if Garnef gave the Dark Orb to Hardin, he's probably still alive, yeah?

He gave himself to Hardin, aww...

Why didn't he do that before? Surely it would have been harder to blast him into hell if he was protected by a bunch of assholes with stupid tomes!

Naw really? Afterall, it IS Garnef, not like he ever does anything nice like have a lovely tea party with various Princesses or anything.

Next Chapter: Enhancing the plot, opposed to nostalgiafagging for once! A shittonne of items, silly dodge animations and the return of the fly haxxing ladies with a new member!

[Maji]

Book 2- Chapter 15: Aritean Army Outta Nowhere!

Gotta be honest: thank Narga for Gato, if he didn't warp Marth across the world, and there were two other filler chapters of Marth climbing down that mountain, he wouldn't have made it down in my save file.

I can only just imagine the horror on the Akaneian's faces as A WHOLE ARMY ARMED TO THE TEETH MAGICALLY (literally) APPEAR IN FRONT OF THEM, AAAAAA!

Ah, Gra, the continent's bitch.

Many = 2, one of them is going to be cheesed in a hilarious motion, and the other one is a give or take really :/

Take a ticket guy, you're not the first, and definitely not the last who uses silly tactics.

Good to see double exclamation point obsessed Marth is back though!(!)

A typical thing in the country of Aritia.

Look familiar?

This time, our lucky prisoner is going to be cheesed.

Fun fact: there is a dick 3~10 RG Bishop in this stage who will always kill "her" even if "he" is still an enemy.

Abel's "him"? Quick, arm everyone with Knightkillers!

Holy fuck, with one quarter of this game left, like three outside chapters, Est finally joins with Ch.1 stats! I am still ashamed of myself for formerally supporting her archetype.

Kain always looked cooler than you, now you prepromote and get stuck in lategame with few chapters to "shine", HA!

Yes, I am totally going to do it, I brought Yumina into this battle specificially for this.

Welp! Worst part is they don't learn from this later on.

So what I LOVE about the chapter is:

Marth orders his army to endorse grave robbing and therefore half the enemies in the stage drop their shit!

I have no idea what the player is supposed to do with all this shit, providing they shop throughout the game, but items! We all like them!

Better not supply shitty lategame characters, there's enough of them already in this game! -fistshake-

How all villages should be.

Like it was all fun and games five years ago, but Marth will have nothing to do with this BS anymore, we wants both items, not just one!

Bullshit! Alan is bullshit too, take him back!

...

Samson was always cooler anyway.

Chiki has a new attack that includes vomiting pixely acidic mist all over the enemy that does lulzy damage on a critical.

oh, OH!

Oh well.

Can't have a drop orgy without replenishing special weapons, now can we?

The Akaneian army, I guess didn't notice the whole "poof!" scene, and the prison guard is dead by now, and Linda pilfered his Silver Lance off his freshly cancered body.

Took him two lines on his behalf, and Marth gaving him nasty looks, but he betrays his love interest just like that!

Some may argue Paola is part goddess

Whatever the case is:

She can fly over the mote with Abel out of the picture and ORKO the boss with little effort.

Stats! Pay close attention to Linda and Paola in particular.

All Linda needs is a little bit of resources for her STR and DEF, and she'll be able to decimate anything that crosses her path, as like any SNES game, magic is unfairly strong.

And Paola is just a goddess on her own, and all that is natural growth on her behalf.

Meh, thanks to Partia, Ryan is able to gain rapid levels killing the shittonne of promotes.

But being locked to bows discredits him from being 1~2 RG, 20 DEF/STR Linda good, or flying haxx Paola good.

Not like there was much mass moving of army on anyone's behalf anyway.

Anyway, Marth has an arbitrary hissy fit out of the blue, but Jeigan one lines him and we never see Marth be emotional again, because Jeigan's motivation speeches are just that good.

Anyway, you can expect more map recycling, but with at least a little bit of effort this time to change things, opposed to just recolouring, even more treasure pillaging, the start of the 3~10 RG horror enemies that plague endgame and more late joiners!

[30425.com]

Ah crap, I forgot to keep track of this. Anyway, good process so far, and glad to see you're still in one piece. Again, my apologies for not keeping track of this.

Also small correction in the book 2 chapter 12 epilogue:

'And this shield, as told by Jeigan in B1Ch19 keeps these dragons sleeping,'

It was Morodorf, that advisor guy nobody remembers who told Marth about it before he went on a nice vacation to Jugdral.

Edited March 5, 2012 by Moonwulf

[Maji]

Umm, so here is some Neptune sounds to groove to as to say I haven't given up on this, and will get back to it soon. Expect a REAL update one of these days coming up.

[Maji]

Anyway:

Book 2- Chapter 16: Get Outta' Mah' Castle! Again...

I really do want to know who is narriating this story, it was like Jeigan for two, then emotion Marth, back to Jeigan, then Marth, ughghgh inconsistancies.

In four years, he lost his brains, in exchange for emotions, luckily the question Marth is sort of in the past!

What if Sheeda was dead by this point?.. Oh Paola, you've been such a help all this time!

Like literally ever single castle chapter in this game, it's like they have radar on Marth's raids or something.

And while we're bitching about treasure, why did Gato let Aritea keep the Earth Orb if he just spent 600 years looking for it?

Fortunately, this Thief moves at the pace of Neptune's orbit around the Sun, so we can either immediately dispose of him now, or wait a billion turns until he finally makes it to the escape area.

Feena

This Devil!Thief becomes a theme here, FE3B2 tries to intimidate the player by throwing a mass amount of troops at them with high ATK in hopes that the haxx ATK'll at least chip their DEF at least a little bit.

Also, remember the whole Gordon recruiting George hooha? Well, they do it again! Granted, it's at least a little bit more obvious this time around.

To make up for the map recycling, they added some archetecture this time around to make it at least a little bit more bearable. DON'T OPEN THE DOOR, OH GOD, WAIT AS LONG AS YOU CAN! When you do, FE3B2 will then show you its new plan to try and conquer the player, and this plan will be here to stay after this chapter.

Remember how I said the orgy of high hitters? Welp!

I also make really dumb ideas sometimes when I play this game.

Ah, here is a better plan! /dead serious

Linda- gives FE3's cheap tactics the finger by having access to max DEF thanks to Star Shards, and magic.

Yeah, if this were drafts, Linda would have cancer'd you for that sword already!

Holy holepunch, George, you're going to top Marth's question per chaper quota in one conversation box!

But I really like George's tone here, he talks to Astria like he is a child. I like George, he's such an asshole.

Then again, Astria is sort of not there, most of the time. Let's go on a timewarp!

Book 1:

Astria: "Mediuth is a nice guy, surely he'll free Midia after this!"

Book 2:

Astria: "Hardin destroyed everything, and Nina hasn't been seen in months; he's such a nice guy!"

Didn't Boa use that exact logic on Midia as well? Crazy.

He does have semi-acceptable bases, and access to the Miracle sword, but Oguma and Navarre are the Heroes. Not like they're really used with Paola flying around, and tank Linda anyway. In fact, most of the chapters, you really only need to field the two of them to progress with ease.

Opening the door leads us to an old guy with that awful tome we only saw once way back in Thebes in Book 1. It gets sillier than just that though: opening the door also introduces us to like four other Bishops all with Meteor, so you really have to move fast if you don't want to be end of Jurassic era'd.

Fortunately, it's his only tome, which leaves us to be able to:

Kill him without losing a single HP, take that Book 2!

Surely the enemy would leave her be as they invade the castle. She'll come out of her room shortly enough for a glass of water!

Eh, no biggie, she should be used to this by now. By this point, this is more of a running joke, "Princess Ellis got captured by Garnef, again!"

Welp, I guess we're going to have to go to his castle and jump over his fire breathing self and get the hammer/Starlight tome placed conveniently at the end of the bridge again!

I direct you to the second and third line of Gato, you don't say... I always laugh uncontrollably at this part, even if I have played this game like a billion times.

To us, this means actual progress in this game, which is a godsend!

Next Chapter: Having his house back, Marth is an asshole, more tits, tits, but with actual armour on them this time, even more map recycling and the hardest enemies evar!!!11!!1oneone

[Emperor Hardin]

Awesome, personally I don't even bother to recruit Astram alot of the time. I just take the Mercurius out of his hands.

On a minor correction, it was technically Cartas ancestor that stole the Shield but whatever. I hear Cartas pictured in the latest Fire Emblem Art book as a blonde bearded man.

[Shin]

Awesome, personally I don't even bother to recruit Astram alot of the time. I just take the Mercurius out of his hands.

On a minor correction, it was technically Cartas ancestor that stole the Shield but whatever. I hear Cartas pictured in the latest Fire Emblem Art book as a blonde bearded man.

I actually killed him by accident on my first run, I assumed he was a lost cause and killed him when he first appeared.

[Otherarrow]

Awesome, personally I don't even bother to recruit Astram alot of the time. I just take the Mercurius out of his hands.

On a minor correction, it was technically Cartas ancestor that stole the Shield but whatever. I hear Cartas pictured in the latest Fire Emblem Art book as a blonde bearded man.

I could have sworn that Adrah was Artemis's ancestor. Unless Artemis and Cartas were cousins. Which would make the people wanting her to marry him over Anri kinda weird.

But yeah, Cartas got the Shield from Artemis at some point, but the gems were already gone by then.

[Emperor Hardin]

I could have sworn that Adrah was Artemis's ancestor. Unless Artemis and Cartas were cousins. Which would make the people wanting her to marry him over Anri kinda weird.

People did that all the time in both real life and Fire Emblem, so it wouldn't be surprising to me.

Also its really hilarious to surround Willow with the Pegasus Sisters and Triangle Attack him.

[Maji]

Book 2- Chapter 17: An Assholy Detour

How about this time we raze all the villages this time so they don't rise up against Aritea again?

Yay, bringing in characters that apparently didn't exist, but did at the same time! $50 says Jiol's wife left him from getting sick of him calling her an idiot.

"youths" I'm sure y'all know how this chapter is going to turn out.

Just like that.

So yeah.. this basically sums up the enemy AI, details to come.

It gets better.:

If all the enemies were like that, it still wouldn't make a difference, having 20 DEF in this game auto wrecks it. However, there is a reason 75% of the soldiers are like that, which will be explained later.

You were here, for like, what, a year, and you gained that much nationalism?

Technically, you were also part of the army who took her father, it's just a big fun hypocritical cycle!

Amusingly enough, she sits on the throne for this whole chapter, not doing anything about the potential slaughter that might take place.

He DOES need his five-line arc, no matter how minute it is!

Kind of sad that Samson managed to turn into the manliest character in Book 2 with just one line. He wasn't even trying, and he topped Marth just like that.

Mixed in with the LV.1's, they are also filthy, dirty Akaneians, and we hate their guts. We want to destroy them, their families, throw their newborn children into a fire, raze their houses and their livestock, but not touch the LV. 1 Gra soldiers.

Man, Gra just isn't having a good decade, this is twice all their treasure gets raided by Thieves.. they are also one turn away from escaping, and you're literally forced to warp if you want their swag.

So, Marth gets this awesome turn consuming Angel Robe, right? Because Gra is his little bitchy brother. Fuck, I want free items, opposed to nagging from my family now!

Holy Mario 64! Why does this staff even exist? It's not like Malliesia is begging to be front line anyway.

You are about to see why giving Marth the Boots really gets rid of headache.

If he didn't, he wouldn't have the MV to 1 turn recruit Sheema, and Samson would be riding his ass with near max SPD, Hero's CRTC rates, and a Silver Sword.

Marth lacks creativity from being stretched out into two 1990s game, so he just uses the exact logic he used on the villager .4 seconds ago.

Which leads me to say: those LV.1 guys? If you kill, touch, or even jokingly demand for their lunch money (which probably got stolen by the Thieves, who abruptly got slaughtered by the Ariteans amusingly enough), Sheema and Samson will be perma enemies. This stage consists of pushing the still pussy LV. 20 units around, and fight some Dragon Knight reinforcements.

Sheema is sort of like a horrible proto FE11!Zagaro/Wolf in a way, having crap bases, but good growths. Unfortunately, nothing hilarious like Zagaro and Wolf's growths, but her lowest growth is 50% in SPD. However, seeing as endgame is like a few chapters away, and those bases are just awful, and FE3!Generals are awful, I am more excited for that ring than her.

Also, her armour is a nice shade of hot pink, which sort of shits all over her attempt of being masculine and breaking away from the sexist world of Akaneia. They also don't even change this in FE12, ughghgh /rant.

Recruitment chains! It sort of makes me wonder if one didn't recruit him right after Marth recruited Sheema. Apparently, bosses can yell across a battlefield, and everyone will hear without any tribulation, but Marth recruiting is very much so reminiscent to a whisper?

I don't think there will be much problem where you two are going to be sitting for the rest of the game~

Dem bases, and semi passable growths (sans SKL/SPD, which amusingly enough are already almost capped), but meh, two Heroes, who don't even do much are enough.

Heading east would lead you into the Gra strait though, geography in Akaneia is really confusing.

That way we don't have to map recycle Chapter 4 Book 1 as well, which is very exciting. We've been fighting on three recycled maps straight that were in Book 1, do you know that, IS?

Even more exciting, Marth shows some signs of intellect for the first time in Book 2!

Next chapter: With Linda and Paola decimating everything, and Marth with Boots, I'm running out of things to say about maps! Anyway, there will most definitely be convenience, lulzy, unnecessary, yet amusing bloodshed, FE3 trying its dirty tricks again, and lots of Paola!

[Icon of Sin]

Sheema is sort of like a horrible proto FE11!Zagaro/Wolf in a way, having crap bases, but good growths. Unfortunately, nothing hilarious like Zagaro and Wolf's growths, but her lowest growth is 50% in SPD. However, seeing as endgame is like a few chapters away, and those bases are just awful, and FE3!Generals are awful, I am more excited for that ring than her.

Also, her armour is a nice shade of hot pink, which sort of shits all over her attempt of being masculine and breaking away from the sexist world of Akaneia. They also don't even change this in FE12, ughghgh /rant.

Aww, and I wanted an all pink armor battle between her and Hardin.

[Maji]

Can we get an update up in this bitch?

Chapter 18: Can't Let You Seize That, Starlord!

It was passible last war, we called it Lefcandy, worst thing happened was an orgy of reinforcements.

Amusingly enough, Akaneia's most vulnerable place is also one of the worst fortifyed places in the game.

Oh god, this IS going to turn out to be like Starfox, where we take all the phrases the old guy says and twists them into sexual slang!

Welp! I like to imagine Jeigan feeling all about everything, AND THEN TWO SECONDS AFTER HIS "!!" WORTHY STATEMENT...

Oh yeah, Hardin's most loyal subjects, definitely did not picture fighting them, unfathomable indeed, mmhmm.

Apparently, the enemy still doesn't know that mountains/castle halls = chokepoints which makes things easier than an open field like say.. Pales courtyard or something.

Sadly, Gaidens didn't exist back in 1993 when FE3 was around.

That's as much plot development you're going to get from them by the way.

Don't you strawman me, Zagaro! Oh it's on, it's on!

I'd imagine if he wasn't surrounded by everything, he most likely would with that kind of attitude, young man!

Well, the good news is his FE11 HP growths kicked in, and he gained +11 HP in twelve levels, but all his other growths got the ugly end of the RNG stick.

Eight levels between Book 1 and 2! I guess Hardin even doesn't even use him much.

Why isn't he the leader of Team Wolf? He has better everything than everyone.

-Roshe's will come at a later chapter; too lazy loooooool

So yeah, but you don't even have to fight anything in this chapter that much.

Whoops, excuse me! Is that Feena over there as well?

Yes, indeed it is.

Here is the greatest payback for the castle seige of Orleans ever.

So, for some reason, he is just magically sitting here.

Some reason, the Wolf team are more loyal to Hardin's brother than Hardin himself, just after Biraku said that he'd die for Hardin. Sure, why not?

Whoops...

It wasn't for mere pleasure and for EXP, I swear!

Hey, isn't that-

Convenience out of nowhere! Otherwise, our journey to Pales would've been all for naught. Somehow, Marth knew he was going to find the Life Orb in the mountains, dragonball radar? We'll never know.

Which leaves us to:

Did someone say Paola and Minerva?!

Marth doesn't keep promises with anyone. 8)

Stas! I don't even know how I 20'd Julian in this playthough.

Or why Paola"s" isn't at 20 herself.

Linda is the "omg ur gross, go away" girl who stops all the reinforcements, while Marth runs ahead.

Paola likes to go ahead and carve a path for Marth to seizebitch.

While we are throwing French terms around, can anyone say, déjà vu?

And you'll never guess what happened to her, and where she is!

Sadly, Thomas, and co. sort of fell off the face of the planet, but, that just means four less people to Rescue and to show Akaneia that if capturing didn't work before, it's not going to work now!

Anyway, expect the greatest cheese in FE3 yet, more people falling off Earth, autumn in Akaneia and Marth plowing through enemy ass for once!

[Maji]

hi.

Book 2- Chapter 19: Cavalry After the Battle

With any luck, Hardin's calendar will go down as the world's shortest calandar.

Climbing mountains is a bitch without time lapses.

-It then goes on about the battle, fate of kingdoms, etc, but I'm sure you get the point.-

Second last map recycle!

Despite the scary look this has, it won't be that bad.

Marth can still see through mountains, which is convenient.

Aight then, let's pull some Napoleon and show those defense pussies that offense is funner and better!

Yep, not even going to even bother moving anyone else. (Marth is already halfway across the battlefield, as Feenda danced for him.)

Ah, the Slippy of Team Wolf.

The other three are sort of in the ether, and we will never hear about them ever again.

Ahahahah, no.

lol

Free Silver Lance?

He has one of the best boss names.

Now, there is something very much crucial (if you desire your sanity to remain intact.)

Whee, isn't this fun?!

First: kill the boss, yeah.

Second, the minute you do, SEIZE THE BITCH! Or else, see all those forts? Paladins, yep, every uncovered fort too, and for three turns straight, which needless to say, will make Marth's happy skipping to the castle 150% more bitchy. Of course, this is only able to be done with the Again staff*, but two charges is all I need later on.

*IIRC, if someone can confirm if they really want.

Being part of a failed revolt, as well as being a mediocre unit who is right at the castle entrance during a four phase war usually does that, y'know.

But fuck the wound, plot at the near end of the game is more important!

Akaneia doesn't believe women should have power, or if they do, it should be supported on the back of a man (see: Sheema and Samson)

Should've ditched the slut, and became king of Akaneia, Marth.

What if she were to die at any point of either books?

Boa: "unspeakable... Unthinkable in fact...

...However, Lord Hardin was very happy. Compared to ascending Akaneia's throne, he seemed happier about the fact that Nina chose him for her husband.

Besides, you sort of killed Camus, remember?

Why wouldn't Hardin not know of Nina's love for Camus? I mean, she pretty much announced it in front of everyone before Marach sent him into planetary orbit.

Listened to death metal music until he felt better. Then Garnef disguised as a peddler somehow managed to go to his room (which is still locked, mind you) and give him the Dark Orb.

Hopefully, he is a good discipliner, and turned off the power in Nina's room, or she'd just play Xbox, go on the internet, secretly talk to Boa on the intercom (which Hardin found out, which is why Boa is sort of dying) or something while in her room. Parents do that, you know? Ugh, some people shouldn't have children I was on the bus the other day, and crying children everywhere, and the mother didn't know what to do, but yell, which made the kid even more upset. Anyway:

I still don't see why Rena is there, does the Dark Dragon need a double douse of Macedonian blood, or are we at a shortage of Sisters in Akaneia, so they just threw her in?

(Which is much better than having a filler unit joining, no sarcasm.)

Tune in for the corniest battle ever, angsty conversations that are yelled across a castle, hostage failure and DOULAM AND METEORS, OH GOD!

See you on my next work break! (?)

Edited June 21, 2012 by Bruiser Kang

[PuffPuff]

Book I

Book 1 Chapters 1-20

Chapter 0: A Long Time Ago in a Galaxy Far, Far Away Without Lightsabers

Best strat/rpg game ever manifactured for the SNES.

And we just broke the game already via giving Sheeda a lulzy weapon and thanks to her natural Spd/Skl, she will ALWAYS hit twice and there is no weapon triangle in this game, so she can rock the hell out in this chapter. ;D

Chapter 1

Shiida has always been a broken flyer. Using Silver from the start ups her durability alot more with her usual low Str growth.

Chapter 2

Fun fun, so being a bloodthirsty hero, we go to slaughter them all.

Um...Marth is not a bloodthristy hero. He despises fighting and only does it for a brighter future.

And for using Ogma. It would be wrong not to.

Chapter 3

Julian: Ironically, he's one of the best fighters in this game, that is if you have the apparent "mad skillz" to raise him. Only thing that grinds against him is his non existent WLV growth, but that's what the Manual you get a couple of chapters later is for. ;D

You only can get 1 Manual in this game and it's not until after the chapter that you recruit Linde in.

Chapter 4

Poor Machis, everyone hates you.

Matthis always annoyed the hell out of me whenever recruiting him. xP

Chapter 6

Haiman? Oh, oh my, that's awfully close to- okay fine, so sexual organ jokes in this LP (if I made some in earlier entries ignore them. )

Didn't Minerva call him Haiman like two seconds ago? Besides that, yet another 1~1 Rg dude, only this chapter, laud...

She was meanting to call him Harmain. It was a translation error.

Chapter 7

Well...other than nerfing this chapters reinforcements that they've had in the NES version. I'd say feh.

Chapter 8

Get in line with all the other girls, Missy, Marth is a busy man.

She's much braver for enduring this pain and with her stubborn attitude allows her to survive. =3

You had to be the worst enemy I've ever "fought"

Minerva didn't want to fight. Especially against her will.

Chapter 9

Why the hell not? Our army is chocked full of them anyway.

But ironically, Marth wants none of that shit, free children, or gtfo.

Before that, he threatens the slave trader's life, like he should (read: before FE11 where he sort of is like "I'M HERE I'M QUEER AND EVERYONE IS SAFE!" and that's that)

And the reason that NOA retconned the children slavery thing making it only citizenry who were captured and stating the "Fist in your manakete munchies" to cover up for the children slavery thing of course gave me a good chuckle. =P And that Marth has threatened the slave trader also retconning that too only stating Ahh...the Altean army. =P

Chapter 11

Thomas- And our main attraction, this chubby kid/compressed and shota looking Zagaro. Fap to his base Wlv and Str, and the fact the Partia comes at the end of this chapter. With three more Wlv growths to gain to use it and a 50% chance to gain, I love him.

Also, I neglected Gordon, so he's sort of down in the dumps.

Thomth looks like Sedgar only cuz IS was to lazy to develop his mug.

Y-you mean you've had this weapon this whole time? y u hold out on us gurl?

Nina didn't give the bow to you until now. Because she thought that you weren't ready for it yet. And those legendary weapons were better, cuz they give out Elite unlike the FE11&12's.

Chapter 12

I liked the second one better. =]

Chapter 13

I've mistaken him for a girl ninja for a long time till this game got translated.

And I've liked the DS's better. =]

Chapter 16

Nah.

She had to have snuck the Miracle Sword out of the empire. There is no way that she could fight off Dolhr on her own.

Chapter 17

This is the ONLY place where you can find excess promotional items by the way, so if you don't go here, then bam! No promoted Linda and Rena and no Thomas or half of the Mercs.

You don't nessisarily need the secret shop for Linde's promotion even though Bishop Rings have always been the most contested item in any of these games. And you shouldn't averagely use more than 2 merc, calvs, etc in a playthrough.

Chapter 18

He then gets cocky with his magic book n' all, yeah yeah Garnef, too bad Bishops can't wield the Falchion, eh?

Fun fact: Garnef had these things all this time, why did it only occur to him to rebel against Mediuth until now?

Maph o shi- count: 7

I've liked this better than the other that NOA decided to retcon Gharnef trolling Medith saying that not even he can oppose him and even has him under his wing. That evil dastard. D:

Chapter 20

I've always love that scene when Medith comes out of the ground. Most mesmerising part of the game that I'd always would love to see.

Just so ...understated. It really underlines how few fucks Astram gives about everything that he'll be "very sad" if Midia dies. I'd be sadder than that if she died because she's a fine piece of ass.

Right.

And no one gives a fuck about Astram anyway.

Fire Emblem timeline, in which FE4/5 as games came out later, but the stories themselves take place predating those of FE1/3.

Kinda like FE6 and FE7, but more so, since FE4 and FE5 happened long before FE1 and FE3 took place.

Source

Of course.

It came more medival than with FE4&5's time.

Gotoh is a dick.

He doesn't even give u the Light Orb either in Book II unless u prove your worth. I don't think that it's that bad.

Edited June 21, 2012 by アイネ

[PuffPuff]

Book II

Chapters 1-19

Chapter 1

What's Leaf with green armour doing here

And that Rody looks alot like Prince Leif in this version. xD

Malliesia- Seeing as she gets: A- two personal staves B- joins early and C- has decent growths you'd have to be daft not to use her, or not like using slutty girls.

Mallesia is my most favorite character in this game. <3

I don't think it works that way either, see, we're here to KILL you.

And Yumi's bold and snotty attitude is why that she is safe. =]

-----

This chapter always makes me feel so alive whenever I play it!

Chapter 3

We are auto-introduced (re-introduced?) to the sexiest woman in FE3 talking to some guy she has no previous affiliation to, why the hell not?

She's only interested in Abel till Est crushed Palla's heart.

IS's way of highly recommending you use her: can auto promote, has access to a plethora of weaponry, is sexy, very sexy, half capped bases, joins in third chapter and has god-like growths. I like IS for this.

And Palla's the best unit in the game!

Machis is the kind of guy who can be persuaded in one sentence.

"Those aren't poisoned, because I said so!"

With that, he tags along, dear God, that's the second time Macedonia pushed him around!

And Matthis still embarrases me.

Chapter 4

This kid has the right idea.

What else is one supposed to use magic for? :/

Olwen: "My word, I locked my car keys in the car again, I shall have to blast the door open with my Dime Thunder!"

Kids. Gotta luv em.

Chapter 5

Oh Julian, your loin cloth to show your nice, shiny legs off, your clingy brother-in-law, working with a bunch of mountain men, we all know your ways.

And that was "Julian still in the closet" featuring Ricardo the awesome.

Brothery love. Such an amusing feature to a Japan only series. xD

You're given a choice:

1.) Kill him and make Ryan and Gordon demi-Gods with supremely early access to Partia.

2.) Leave him and get him and the Partia, and the good ending in near mid-game.

For completionist sake, we'll do #2 in this run.

And you don't want to kill Jeorge. You won't go beyond Chapter 20 if you do.

Chapter 6

Kiss Yubello.

FBI don't exist in medival times.

And Lang got his taste.

As for the orbs, it seems that Gotoh is testing u. He couldv'e gotten those orbs fragments himself. Going Dragonball here. xD

Chapter 7

It's Navarre, he gains fame through being an anti-social prick. :/

Yes. Navarre is an antisocial prick.

Yeah, purple and brown? Just what are you thinking?

Welp, there goes gentle, right out the window. And it's the 1990s Feena, everyone had gaudy hair!

Even though Feena has the hots for him. Who wouldn't? Gotta love his bangs. <3

And Navarre shouldn't resist her charms. He isn't interested in her that way xP

He only has interest in Shiida whom Marth has already taken.

Say Maji, how exactly did you deal with the reinforcement swarm in chapter 6? I just out-tanked them because otherwise I'd be fucked from both sides eventually.

Also, did you know about there being a reblow staff below the cave on the left? Only problem is, you'd face off against a dragon that spawns there when you approach it.

That u can already get a Firestone for defeating it too.

Chapter 9

Minerva purposely held back to made sure that Michalis lived.

And I would kill Astram if possible to get earlier access to Miracle. As the dragons are worth 99 EXP per kill with that weapon.

Chapter 10

I love glitching this chapter. If you have Wendell talk to him and that the enemies still lives. They will somehow walk to you without attacking you making this the easiest chapter in the game. You've got to have the worm priests attack you while Ellrean walks up to you. Hurry up though. The Silver Card Thief won't show up if you glitch this chapter too late. After Turn 10 that is.

Naturally, this pissed Garnef off so much, that he was all "Y U NO GOOD TOME?!" so he stole the Dark Orb, Star Ocean IC'd it, got Maph, and Maph/Dark Orb is a hell of a drug, so it turned him into the crack hoe we all know now!

Gharnef was known to be a religious kind person till the Dark Orb consumed his soul for all eternity.

Chapter 11

The Berserkers must be starving to have a woman if the Lady Sword can do bonus DMG to them.

Chapter 12

Sixteen DEF! Which means she'll laugh at everything, and kill everything thanks to the typical FE law of enemies not having the word "RES" in their dictionaries.

Holy Shi- 16!!! =o

To bad that defenses are useless against dragons as DMG's cannot be neglected from them.

Chapter 13

Next chapter: dickery on IS's behalf, being thankful that I gave the Boots to Marth, orbs ahoy and we also get the greatest endgame trivializing staff in the history of FE!

Absolutely.

Chapter 14

With "--" for LCK, this somehow rounds their odds of being struck with the Devil Sword to 0%, meaning that the Devil Sword is just an ordinary sword for them, and you'll be biting 23 DMG most of the time thanks to the Thieves's high hit rate.

That is whack.

Degenerating, dragons? Well, lovely Anna here has a solution to that as well as shits all over the plot: you can now buy your own sanity in four delicious new flavours!

And WTF. You didn't get the Silver Card in Chapter 10?

Chapter 15

oh, OH!

Oh well.

You did the right thing. Est would have left him to have him look for her for all eturnity.

The Akaneian army, I guess didn't notice the whole "poof!" scene, and the prison guard is dead by now, and Linda pilfered his Silver Lance off his freshly cancered body.

Oh wait. You let him live.

Chapter 16

Astram was better off dead in Chapter 9. x.x

Chapter 17

I've always thought that Samson was Marth's' dad until translation to this game was made.

Chapter 19

Forced marriage to Hardin was rather tragic even though her heart was set on Camus.

-----

Awesome, personally I don't even bother to recruit Astram alot of the time. I just take the Mercurius out of his hands.

On a minor correction, it was technically Cartas ancestor that stole the Shield but whatever. I hear Cartas pictured in the latest Fire Emblem Art book as a blonde bearded man.

^This.

Edited June 21, 2012 by アイネ

[Darros]

Hooray Maji's back. I'm hoping this will be finished soon! :D

[PuffPuff]

Hooray Maji's back. I'm hoping this will be finished soon! :D

It's nice to see that Maji is really getting into this game, Monshou. My 2nd favorite game of the series. I'm so happy someone loves it as much as I do. <3

[Maji]

Eh, I promised I would update on my work break, and I didn't (expected/10), so here's an update now.

Book 2- Chapter 20: 20's! 20's Everywhere!

In fact, several hours cannot discribe how fast this place was taken.

Unfortunately, did not supply Energy Rings and shit, like the Aritean populace did, so no one really gives a shit about them.

Good to see that the creativity is consistent in the whole of the continent.

Everything else after this is sort of "You're on your own, tits-on-a-dragon; I'll be with you to take the gate shortly."

Yay, I guess?

The way the architecture just sort of disappears when the door is opened sort of reminds me of those Polly Pocket things in the 90s.

I smell a Light Orb trade chain battle a mile away.

There's three people on my team who aren't even promoted yet, lol.

Oh hey, that's fine, let the enemy just sort of slip through the ranks why don't you? Is that unit even an enemy? Like he's red, but he's also opening the door, which I'd imagine Hardin would want it to be shut at this particular moment in time.

I love awkward SNES transitions.

For SNES plot sake, we'll say it is, and Midia is an oblivious wench who enjoys stating the obvious to drag conversations out.

Like honestly, Midia, who doesn't want to destroy that place? It's a bitch to fight there, so better off dead than fighting there again.

That's why.. she's here and well, and telling you to journey to Niflheim.

Oh god, the best line ever is coming up.

"Because I am beautiful in every single way, words won't bring me down, no-oh, so don't you bring me down, ooooh, today."

Weren't you going to kill her like just two seconds ago though?

Anyway, that's that, you're stupid, Akaneia.

One mounted chapter left, really, FE3, really? I suppose everyone would bitch and moan if she died in the coup, so for fanboy sake, I guess they decided to keep her alive?

I'm tired of this shit, let's FE3B2!

Bodyguards are 150% better if they actually GUARD you instead of just sort of stand in the same room, unaware of things.

And you Paola! Assassins only work if they kill their target!

The big baddie of FE3 is Lv. 1, well, that's.. underwhelming.

Next phase, Paola completes the assassination with the help of Life Orb.

She will have fun with this next chapter, then it will sort of go to Doga, who will sort of not be as awesome with it in endgame.

He puts his turban on, takes some Visine, and loses the fur trim to confirm this.

And lost spectacularly from the looks of it.

Umm.. it's a bit too late for that.

And she was just using you to rebuild Akaneia! Isn't it cute how all these things turn out?!

We are also treated to breath taking SNES CG of the orbs flying onto the Fire Emblem.

That's exciting, I guess. No more Life Orb. :(

And, if you didn't know, because I didn't point this out until now, the final boss of Book 1 is just sort of casually lounging around where the Fire Dragon was in this map in Book 1, why not?

Thanks to the power of the S.o.S, it doesn't stick around for long. If it wasn't for Paola's assassination, we would have to fight it without a Falchion to OHKO it.

There's also these things, right? And they cast spells that reduce a unit's HP to one, and there's like a billion 3~10 RG units around to pick the Doulam'd units off, isn't this fun?

Again, Hardin, bodyguards only work if they're NOT locked in jail!

Anyway, this chapter has dragged on for too long, let's end it.

Women, women everywhere!

Everyone just sort of forgets about Garnef and lives hapily every after.

"Oh Auntie Em, there's no place like home!"

Welp!

It may look like an amazing plot twist, but..

It's really just four creeps who wanted to be pretty, and managed to dress up like the princesses to throw Marth off, as he never listens to what Gato has to say.

With the uncanning disguises, I'm sure they do so every other day in the privacy of their own castle.

-Rehash!-

Marth: Princesses? Kidnapped? Garnef? Saturn's rings?

Jeigan: Yes, and I am going to repeat exactly what you said. Oh hey, look! Gato!

Gato: Told you bitches! Anyway, here's some new stuff.

That basically means run around their nest with the S.o.S and send them back to the ground for a later generation to deal with.

So let's go do that!

Next Chapter- Dead things, not paying attention to detail, as we simply don't need to, last day for mounts, and convenience!

[Maji]

Book 2- Endgame Part I: Where Things Begin Getting Silly

So, basically, exactly where Book I's endgame was, because we're just too half assed to kill dragons fully, and must do so again.

If there was such thing as a weapon triangle, sword users would have a field day. Since there isn't, axes just have awful, awful hit rate, so these guys are just as silly as they were back in the desert.

Let's get just this over with, again.

This screenshot pretty much sums up late game: dark mages, trivial axe users and dragons. Really, the dark mages are the only concern for late game.

If they don't have Doulam, then they have this, and are in obscure locations, which makes the second last chapter real bitchy.

Unfortunatly, Macedonia doesn't really have one of those "Welcome to Macedonia!" signs, or a boarder guard (on the north side that is).

Sure, Marth is happy to help everyone else in Akaneia, except for clensing the scariest place on earth until it relates to him.

36% ACC, looooool

Dancers doing close to max damage with the Lady Sword, loooool

This chapter is insanely easy if you have fliers to kill everything before they get to touch Marth, who moves faster than time itself, and as a result can five turn most chapters.

Oh hey, I thought he was going to get Wolf Squad'd, and not exist anymore!

That seems to be a common theme in FE3B2, and I like how he doesn't even ask Misheil if he's okay or anything.

Should've kept it in the Aritean safe after the war instead of just leaving it in the sun for any old Maph wizard to take~

Indeed, anyone who lets themselves get hit by Maph outta be ashamed of themselves!

Unfortunately (?), Minerva can't interact with her brother in this version, magically bringing him back to life, nor is Maria around to also magically save him, so he dies.

In any case, with the last convenience out of the way, we can now proceed to ruin this game without any worry.

Why is there even a village here, if it's a land ruled by dragons and barbarians who live in caves, as the reinforcements show?

With the help of Paola, the Meteor boss, and everything around it was dead the whole turns later when Marth went to sit on the gate.

Rehash of Mediuth hating everything in the fourth last map in the game!

Oh my god, Marth, you should have chopped him to pieces, or something, rather than poke him, and leave him to go to on sick leave somewhere to come back.

Mediuth is evolving! Mediuth evolved into the same thing, only with a different name!

Oh god, here it comes, here it comes..

DUN DUEXPECTED EXPECTED.. apparently, women in Akaneia are only good for killing bandits, and sacrificing to the Dark Dragon, as Mediuth just doesn't like the taste of men.

I thought this was already established.

Next part- trying to overwhelm with numbers again, no more mounts, and a very silly building with hidden everything (and Jeigan enjoys keeping the player informed)

Edited July 9, 2012 by Maji

[Shin]

Enjoying this as always, the next chapter should be interesting, I've always found the second part pretty unfair.