fengaridotdll Posted January 31, 2015 Share Posted January 31, 2015 (edited) LOL, Sigmund Frederick Name was too long so he just turned into a mishmash of two names NONE OF MY GUYS DIED :D Edited January 31, 2015 by The Dark Armorknight Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrhesia Posted January 31, 2015 Author Share Posted January 31, 2015 GEOSCAPE "Ah, Commander, the squad's back! There's so much to catch up o-" BATTLESCAPE I pick a strong squad. Well, as strong as it can be when including all the user guys (this happened straight after C1, so no time to add any new recruits. There's six on the way, plus... whoever dies here.) M. Joranthian: "Alright, loves, time to scope out the are-" so you know how i characterised a 'good landing' as 'everyone lives when they walk outside' It quickly turns into a D-Day situation as Fredericks also goes down under the overwatch, and a shot is fired at Fliegenberg as well (but misses). Fliegenberg gets far enough to realise these are Cyberdisks... who are more or less alien tanks with a shitton of TUs and really good reactions. This is a nightmare. June Strawman comes down to join the party, prepares to take a shot by kneeling... which triggers overwatch that kills her. I load my save, having just now demonstrated why we will never be conventionally walking off the Skyranger EVER. AGAIN. Instead, we will open our first turn by doing nothing. Reactions depend on how many TUs someone has left, and on the first turn the aliens start with all of them. About eight civilians die while we cool our heels. Still in a shit situation, though. The guys to the right are fighting a Disk, the guys to the left killed a Sectoid and are... also fighting a Disk. Now enjoy that you can see everything because Integrity's gonna throw the shit out of a smoke grenade. Weirdly, we take no fire on enemy phase. North Disk still in range, south's missing... but... Strawman: "Aw hell yeah, I sense a double kill coming!" Gunnington: "What the fuck?! It just ate a rocket and an HE shot and it's still alive?!" IT CAN ALSO EAT FOUR DIRECT AUTOCANNON HITS AND LIKE TEN RIFLE SHOTS AS IT HAPPENS but it decides to fuck off and kill more civilians? One shot is taken at us and it misses. I think smoke grenades are awesome. M. Joranthian: "Move to flank him, scout!" Brownpants: "Uh... sarge..." M. Joranthian: "Oh, what now?!" Brownpants: "I'm... I'm faced with an ethical dilemma..." M. Joranthian: "Ugh, fine. We'll lay a base of fire for him. Irongod? Why are you hesitating?" fuck cyberdisks Irongod with the heavy launcher gets two direct hits /and the disk is still up/ Gunnington has a rocket against one of the cyberdisks, but skies it. SPOILERS OUR ENTIRE SQUAD FIRES AT THAT DISK AND CAN'T KILL IT and lawrence and irongod die on enemy phase I decide, stupidly, to take some shots at the roof disks. Actual smart plans this turn include hurling two grenades at INVINCIBLE CYBERDISK and then going under cover so that the disks will have to go to lower ground to hurt us HEY BTW IT SURVIVES THOSE GRENADES AND MARTYR SALTFIELDS DIES ENEMY PHASE survives another direct autocannon hit and some more rifle fire, hell, let's try grenades again NAH IT SURVIVES THE GRENADE OF COURSE IT DOES so i throw four more at it btw it survived also minah joranthian went berserk, fired wildly at a cyberdisk, missed all her shots and got killed on overwatch, i hate this game starting to think grenades explode sequentially and destroy all other nearby grenades before they can explode i hate xcom haha literally the entire squad panicked when fliegenberg and rand died hahahaha and then scully strawman goremask gunnington all die hahahahahahaha and the reminaing three panic ahahahahahahah and then guess who drops their grenade??????????????????????????? i fucking defy anyone who tells me i made any major tactical errors that mission. THAT SHOULD NOT FUCKING COUNT AS THE CRAFT BEING LOST. I LEFT THOSE CUNTS BEHIND. ugh whatever, loading the autosave reluctantly. 'hey parrhesia when was the autosave on' oh no big, jsut the turn my entire squad panicked and then four guys were easily picked off lol only it's 5 this time!! hahaha i'm going to kill myself since there is no way i can salvage this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrhesia Posted January 31, 2015 Author Share Posted January 31, 2015 "MAN WHAT A CRAZY DREAM I THOUGHT WE ALL DIED TRYING TO SAVE JAPAN" "WHEN INSTEAD OUR PLAN WAS MUCH MORE HEROIC" "WEIRD SHIT, HUH" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fengaridotdll Posted January 31, 2015 Share Posted January 31, 2015 "XCOM Operatives killed: 11" Can you give us the names of those lost before you made it just a dream? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrhesia Posted January 31, 2015 Author Share Posted January 31, 2015 (edited) everyone died the people who were left outside to die were, i believe, brownpants, integrity, and thoron jaranthion ftr had the autosave not been in an unwinnable position I would've just booked it to the skyranger and ran - I thought if you consciously hit abort mission you would at least not lose the 'ranger but it turns out you need at least one guy to leave alive (in fact 'kill the invincible disk and then run' was the mission plan for about three turns before i died. because, y'know, i didn't think it had much more explosive autocannon rounds and grenades and rockets and bullets left in the tank.) Edited January 31, 2015 by Parrhesia Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dandragon Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 Name: Dandruff Dragon Sex: Male Class: Shock Other: A beta male looking to become Alpha through war. He will probably die a horrible death. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fengaridotdll Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 Other: A beta male looking to become Alpha through war. He will probably die a horrible death. Just for that, Parrhesia may send you into a massive horde of enemies with a grenade with a fuse of 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Excellen Browning Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 Name: Daniel Scruff Sex: male Class: shock Other: beat an xcom employee at some online shooting game, then got conscripted into XCOM. Name: Missy Davies Sex: female Class: heavy Other: a butch lesbian. Wishes she was male but tries to be the next best thing which is being stereotypical macho. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fengaridotdll Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 Name: Valbo Gronzynski Sex: Male Class: Heavy Other: The obligatory stereotypical macho man. He's a Russian wrestler, who was conscripted into XCOM after bragging about his strength. Unfortunately, they did not know he has next to no skill with a gun. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheMoniker Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 And we have another miserable failure of a mission. On only the middle difficulty. Well, at least nobody died, right? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fengaridotdll Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 And we have another miserable failure of a mission. On only the middle difficulty. Well, at least nobody died, right? Because convenient reset Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrhesia Posted February 1, 2015 Author Share Posted February 1, 2015 (edited) it is not my fault that one cyberdisk survived seven grenades, a rocket, three explosive cannon rounds, seven autocannon rounds and 25-30 rifle shots not sure why i'm being so defensive about it since nobody even accused me of incompetence but fucking hell. Edited February 1, 2015 by Parrhesia Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Freohr Datia Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 RIP CICI ;n; (and everybody else~) stoopid xcom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dinkiniensis Pontifex Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 Name: Norman Tebbit Sex: Male Class: Sniper Other: A tough old bastard who had a long political career in the British parliament. Now his main hobby is shooting aliens. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blah the Prussian Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 Name: Dogson von Vorbeck Class: Heavy Sex: Male Other: Prussian Junker. Father served in the First Gulf War, Grandfather served in the Second a World War, you get the idea. He wants to uphold the family tradition of kicking ass and taking names. He is a heavy since it's the next best thing to driving a Panzer. Snobby, but brave. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrhesia Posted February 1, 2015 Author Share Posted February 1, 2015 RECRUITS I want to believe... he'll survive a mission. wow that bravery Very sniper-centric recruits, this batch. GEOSCAPE bless our lord and saviour so ballistic weapons in XCOM are pretty dogshit. Not only is the laser rifle BETTER AT EVERYTHING, but it doesn't need ammunition. Obviously gonna make a ton of these. I manage three before the next mission, a splashed small UFO. Same squad as in the abortive terror mission - the two Snipers take laser rifles as well as nominal Heavy Prussia Gunnington, since I don't want to use rockets on a mission like this. BATTLESCAPE For all my talk of quiet landings, Golden Rand goes down on enemy phase. It was avoidable - I should've been less laissez-faire with placement, but frankly these soldiers are lucky to be alive anyway. Inexplicably I sent Brownpants off on his own to scout around the other side. A hidden Sectoid fires at him on overwatch, but misses. Fliegenberg picks up Rand's laser rifle. Mostly I took this screenshot to demonstrate the corpse sprite - it doesn't change pending on race/sex, since Rand was a black woman, but it does change depending on armour. I think I'm researching armour right now. Mercifully nobody runs out the breach door, and we can probably move in this turn - the guy who took a shot at Brownpants runs about a bit but our overwatch misses horribly. He doesn't fire, though, and is easy pickings. I typed that, took fourteen shots, saw one of them hit and it wasn't fatal. Fucking rookies. It's left to Brownpants who, thankfully, does manage the kill. Goremask: "I can't fucking wait until we have armour. This method of breaching fucking sucks." Fliegenberg: "Looks alright to me. Get moving, rookies!" Saltfields: "Ugh..." Strawman: "Oh shit, I see a- wow, man, I think he was shooting at you guys. He can't aim for shit." Lawrence: "Hell, I can relate." Saltfields: "Oh, man, could I be a hero?" Saltfields: "WAIT WHERE'D YOU COME FROM" Saltfields: "shit shit shit" M. Joranthian: "It's fine, just fall back. We have a good flank on this, and if he goes the direction he's facing? We'll frag him on overwatch." Saltfields: "BUT WHAT IF ALIEN-SENPAI NOTICES ME" M. Joranthian: "... We'll adapt." Saltfields: "B- baka..." Fliegenberg: "We adapted!" I'm exceptionally confident that the last of the aliens are in the last room. Which is why I'm kind of pissed off that Frederick dies, um, around here somewhere. haha yep okay the alien out there is the last on the map. fuck. Integrity spots him! Lawrence and Strawman, who have meant well but been hopelessly inaccurate all fight, have beads on him, Brownpants could maybe also, and Integrity has, well. A grenade. Kneeling, by the way, not only lowers your profile but gives you aim bonuses. Why not kneel all the time? Well, taking a knee isn't too much of an investment - 4 time units - but standing up takes like 8 or 12 or something. Only kneel if you know you're there for the long haul. kneeling also fucks with your vision and as it turns out makes strawman and lawrence unable to see over this wall. Still, Strawman stands, nails the shots, and that... isn't the last one. Night maps suck. Everyone goes out, Integrity mysteriously sees an opened door. They go and close it, politely. uhh uhhh Integrity: "A COOL AND ALPHA DESTINY AWAITS" Gunnington: *sigh* "... Guess we should check out the barn." Strawman: "Yeah, we're moving ouATrGHF" Strawman... actually survived a hit? The red bar is health, the white bit inside the red bar is either stun damage or how much she's bleeding every turn. If we had medkits we could fix that. We don't have medkits, but she'll be fine anyway. Where's Wally: XCOM Edition Everyone in the lower group is terrible, and can't hit him - but Gunnington somehow draws a bead on his beady little grey head... ... tags him in the back of the head. But there's still some out there. Scully: "Heads up, Prussia!" Gunnington: "Huh?!" Scully: "Roof guy!" AND THEN SCULLY PEGGED IT WITH THE GREATEST TRICK SHOT SOMEHOW. A great mission. Textbook stuff. Oh, and weird shit happens with promotions. Minah Joranthian has already skipped a couple ranks to get to Sergeant, and now goes straight to Colonel. It's weird but I won't complain - presumably it'll even out with time. Casualties: Saltfields, Rand, Integrity, Frederick Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dandragon Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 Haru III Integrity gogogo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheMoniker Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 YOU ALL GOT BEATEN BY A GIRL I think we're getting better at these missions! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
#!/dev/haru Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 Name: Empress Harudoku V. Sanada, Esq. Class: Sniper Sex: Female Other: Deranged into thinking any weapon she carries is a vessel to her SUPERNATURAL LATENT MAGICAL ABILITIES, thus refuses to carry anything that isn't either laser, incendiary, or psionic. They just don't look magical enough otherwise. Also deranged into thinking she's the Empress of a fictional land known as Harutopia, and the physical embodiment of its Goddess. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Integrity Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 (edited) name: Oppa Oppa sex: M class: pref not sniper else don't care other: i'm so cool, i'm so cool, party like a superstar EDIT: i will continue to flood you with chaff name: Chaff Gunblock sex: d/c class: Scout Edited February 1, 2015 by Integrity Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
#!/dev/haru Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 (edited) You know what, why not Name: Sir Gravity Drain III Gender: don't care Class: which one is the shittest, perhaps you need a new class called "beta" just for Sir Gravity Drain III Other: Literally the best person in the whole world in all of the most useless categories, Sir Gravity Drain III was recruited in hopes that he could turn his prodigous talent towards the alien beatdown effort. Unfortunately, this will not be a test of his world-class underwater basketweaving skill, nor his strikingly powerful golf swing. And also, bolas are not on the list of X-COM approved weapons, leaving him rather useless. But hey, at least his inevitable chryssalid might be just as shit at fighting! Edited February 1, 2015 by Utsuho Reiuji Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fengaridotdll Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 (edited) RIP Haru II Integrity He/she went out with a bang Holy crap, Minah's already that high ranked up? She may be Alpha by the fifth successful mission! Edited February 1, 2015 by The Dark Armorknight Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Person123 Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 Hopefully this guy makes up for the ineptitude my first one displayed. Name: Jason McGraw Sex: Male Class: Shock Other: An ex-cop who doesn't play by the rules. He was removed from the force after pissing on the desk of the police chief in a display of dominance. He joined X-COM for vague, undefined reasons. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peener weener Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 Name: Dirty Harry Sex: male Class: shock? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blasied Posted February 2, 2015 Share Posted February 2, 2015 Name: Shirley Boot Sex: Female Class: Shock or Heavy Other: Has a fondness for kicking dead things Name: Hamish MacTavish Sex: Male Class: Medic Other: A highly aggressive Scotsman. Resents being a medic. I will admit, I was not expecting Brownpants to live this long. Good for him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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