Sooo I accidentally saw my teachers phone’s homescreen.

[SatsumaFSoysoy]

From what I understand, "cunt" is still not a word that can be heard in American (and British?) television, despite most other swears being acceptable in media. My Australian friend is pretty casual about that term, though lol.

[Mackc2]

6 minutes ago, Rezzy said:

 It's like even worse than "fuck" or at least not said as often.

I find this statement really funny because where I'm from "Fuck" really has no meaning, even more conservative people such as myself (By Australian standards) will use it in general conversation with no qualms. While cunt is definitely a step up from that (I wouldn't say it in front of my parents) its still common. Pussy on the other hand I never hear except to call someone a wuss and I personally dislike it far more because to me it has a closer implication to female genitals than cunt and that makes me uncomfortable 

[Greencapps]

1 hour ago, Rezzy said:

Maybe I'll be prepared when Leo and Est start asking questions.

Wait you actually named your kids after FE characters? That's awesome. Holy crap, never thought I'd see the day.

[IEatLasers]

2 hours ago, Infinite Dreams said:

Wow, this thread sure took an interesting turn.  

I was a good girl in high school... Didn't do anything naughty.    I was 18 when I first had sex, and it was with my current SO.  He was my first boyfriend too!  I lucked out there.

Also, speaking of swearing - my parents used to get upset when me and my brothers swore, but they swore a lot themselves.  They implemented this system where they would have to give us 25 cents whenever they swore.  I was with my mom watching my dad's work hockey team once, and one of the dudes on the ice swore.  I yelled loudly at him: "you swore, that's 25 cents!"  

Hah! cute. I think I’m gonna be..~ 25 when I first have sex kinda depending on what counts and if I can go to a city where I’m not the only girl that likes girls. 

If I could marry anyone in the world I even know who it’d be but that isn’t gonna work lol. 

 

But yeah. Idk. For now I don’t even want that seriously just like different stuff. 

 

*hugs rezzy* sorry I’m a weirdo!! 

 

Oh and on cursing I only curse in two situations  mostly just during scary movies and I feel bad about it but I can still stop myself before ever saying the F word so I’ve never said it  

Its 1 am ^^

Edited October 20, 2017 by IEatLasers

[Rezzy]

6 hours ago, Greencapps said:

Wait you actually named your kids after FE characters? That's awesome. Holy crap, never thought I'd see the day.

It's more a happy coincidence, but one I don't mind.  And my Leo came before Fates Leo, so they can't accuse me there.

5 hours ago, IEatLasers said:

 

 

*hugs rezzy* sorry I’m a weirdo!! 

 

 

You're okay.

[Arcanite]

9 hours ago, Res said:

I misspoke; I do understand the principle part, just disagree with it. I certainly understand why parents would wish their children not to swear, just as I understand that swearing is a lot more offensive depending on where you grow up.

We have so many studies these days telling us how detrimental spanking is; it increases the risks of mental illness, it's linked with the same negative outcomes as more severe abuse, and above all, it's not the most effective form of punishment. I don't blame our parents' generation but I think it's sad what is and isn't considered acceptable. At least most swearing isn't aimed *at* people, but used more as a form of exclamation.

Anyway! Luckily there's a lot more information out there these days, and people are able to see what is and isn't effective. 

I agree that it probably isn't the most effective form of discipline lol I don't think everyone should beat their kids unlike my mom

But different children need different things so

9 hours ago, SullyMcGully said:

Well you see, it's different for me. Because I live on a farm where you get kicked in the shins and stung by wasps and get your fingers stuck in machinery all of the time. If anybody had an excuse to swear, it'd be me. But then I'd be disowned.

Euphemisms are your friends!

9 hours ago, SullyMcGully said:

Also, @Arcanite, I love the robovangelist! Keep sharing the Good News!

I will purify this whole thread if I have to! 

6 hours ago, IEatLasers said:

Oh and on cursing I only curse in two situations  mostly just during scary movies and I feel bad about it but I can still stop myself before ever saying the F word so I’ve never said it  

You're a good egg

I commend you 

[Greencapps]

6 hours ago, IEatLasers said:

Oh and on cursing I only curse in two situations  mostly just during scary movies and I feel bad about it but I can still stop myself before ever saying the F word so I’ve never said it

Do you mind swearing around you or were you that person in high school?

Tbh I swear like it's going out of style around friends but I don't really have problems censoring myself when it's not the time or place. Most of them have kinda lost all meaning when used in most contexts now. And you're not a bad person if you swear much less a little you're probably better morally in most people's eyes.

1 hour ago, Rezzy said:

It's more a happy coincidence, but one I don't mind.  And my Leo came before Fates Leo, so they can't accuse me there.

Ah well still cool regardless. 

Edited October 20, 2017 by Greencapps

[Tryhard]

going back to the original thing I wonder how "I have the penis, I make the rules" would be perceived

[Jingle Jangle]

6 minutes ago, Tryhard said:

going back to the original thing I wonder how "I have the penis, I make the rules" would be perceived

A sign that the patriarchy is enforcing their will on women.

[Shoblongoo]

9 hours ago, IEatLasers said:

Hah! cute. I think I’m gonna be..~ 25 when I first have sex kinda depending on what counts and if I can go to a city where I’m not the only girl that likes girls. 

If I could marry anyone in the world I even know who it’d be but that isn’t gonna work lol.

But yeah. Idk. For now I don’t even want that seriously just like different stuff.

...college is going to be a very interesting time in your life.

9 hours ago, IEatLasers said:

*hugs rezzy* sorry I’m a weirdo!! 

 

Rezzy already went full den-mother on this thread. I can't really speak to the female experience--but I can maybe speak to the shared experience of late bloomers, high school wierdos, and young adults.

I was one of those guys that did a complete 180 between high school and college.

My high school experience was World of Warcraft, Magic: The Gathering, and AP/Honors Class. Never went to a school dance. Never went to a party. Didn't drink. Didn't smoke. Didn't date or flirt or do any sex stuff. Was too timid to really talk to girls.

...my college experience was just one giant blur of sex, drugs, and rock n' roll...

And I wasn't a frat boy--that wasn't my scene. Went to a few frat parties. The whole crowded house full of "bros" trying to prove their manhood through assorted feats of getting black-out drunk, blasting their playlists, and "tryin' to get muh dick wet" just never did anything for me.

No. I found my scene and discovered my people--randomly backdoored my way into it through the political science and campus activist crowd--when I fell in with the kinksters, the burners, and the new-age hippies.

Frat boys drank and fucked and made alot of noise. These guys partied. All day, everyday, until the end of days. Like the sex and the drugs wasn't even something you did to prove you were "cool"--it was just a part of the lifestyle.  They had their own "vineyard" off-campus where they did their thing.

-the weed was homegrown (it wasn't a vineyard)
-the clothing was optional
-there was no such thing as "behind closed doors"--if you and like five of your friends wanted to drop acid, whip out the paddles and floggers, and have a big ol' drug-fueld kinkster orgy. You could just do it in the middle of the living room--no one would bat an eye.
-the only rule was "Don't Judge."

...it was a different time...

Now I had a good enough head on my shoulders and a strong enough moral compass that I still got my work done, graduated with full honors, went to law school, and wound up where I am today.

Married in my late-20s with a house, a job--hopefully some kids soon.

Why am I telling you this???

I'm telling you this because you are approaching those magical years where you have all the privileges of an adult, and none of the responsibility.  As you grow older you come to appreciate that there are--for lack of a better term--"seasons of your life." For all things, a season.

Your late teens and early twenties--that is the season for testing your boundaries. Indulging the newfound priviliges of adulthood. Doing the things you're not going to be able to do once you have a house. A job. A family. A pile of bills to pay, sitting on your kitchen table.

...and you'll be there one day...

Before you get there--live. Have the time of your life. Once those years are gone you don't get them back; use them to their fullest.

You don't want to be pressured into doing anything you don't want to do. You don't want to do something just to fit in or just because its "cool." You don't want to be unsafe, and you certainly don't want to do anything you aren't ready to do.

But in your own time. When you get there. Just go for it. Don't be so afraid of doing something you'll regret that your biggest regrets later in life become the things you didn't do. 

You're still so young. You're going to grow so much as a person in the next few years--the awkward 17 year old you are today is not the woman you are going to become. 

So enjoy it. Set your own pace. Be your own person. But don't get to settled into your comfort zone and don't be too afraid to jump into something new and wild--you're only young once!

 That's my advice to you

9 hours ago, IEatLasers said:

Oh and on cursing I only curse in two situations  mostly just during scary movies and I feel bad about it but I can still stop myself before ever saying the F word so I’ve never said it 

When I used "dirty" language as a child, my mom would put soap in my mouth and scrub it out. 

But my grandma from Brooklyn would watch me when my parents worked. She had a New York City mouth on her.

...so I'd be sitting on my grandma's lap at three-years-old. She'd be singing me nursery rhymes. And her lyrics would go:

Behind the 'fridgerator there was a piece of glass.
Ms. Susie sat upon it. And broke her big fat ass.

Ask me no more questions. I'll tell you no more lies.
A man got hit with a bag-of-shit, right between the eyes.

I was getting some weird mixed-messages.
 

Edited October 20, 2017 by Shoblongoo

[Greencapps]

2 hours ago, Jingle Jangle said:

A sign that the patriarchy is enforcing their will on women.

Gotta love them double standards.

[Nobody]

2 hours ago, Tryhard said:

going back to the original thing I wonder how "I have the penis, I make the rules" would be perceived

5 minutes ago, Greencapps said:

Gotta love them double standards.

Society used to act as if men "owned" women in relationships, though. Women had to "obey" their husbands and this sort of crap. The opposite is not true. You can't look at this sort of stuff without taking in consideration society as a whole. IDK how it is in the US, but here it's not rare for newslines to appear about women who were beaten or even killed for trying to leave their husbands, while the opposite is almost never heard off, the worst you see is some psycho lady breaking their ex's car/cellphone or something.

[IEatLasers]

1 minute ago, Nobody said:

Society used to act as if men "owned" women in relationships, though. Women had to "obey" their husbands and this sort of crap. The opposite is not true. You can't look at this sort of stuff without taking in consideration society as a whole. IDK how it is in the US, but here it's not rare for newslines to appear about women who were beaten or even killed for trying to leave their husbands, while the opposite is almost never heard off, the worst you see is some psycho lady breaking their ex's car/cellphone or something.

People want to pretend it’s a 1:1 comparison when it’s not, it really can’t be. 

 

Anyway~ @Shoblongoo thanks for the advice but idk that doesn’t really sound like what I want. I don’t just not drink and do drugs or have sex because I’m timid; I don’t want to drink or do drugs, ever really. 

And I honestly don’t want to have sex. Even if she was a really cute girl. But hopefully she’s hold my hand while sleeping in the same bed as me cuz that would feel really exciting and hot 

oh and to everyone who asked; I don’t curse because it makes me a bit uncomfortable. Saying “bad words” feels weird or like it doesn’t even come from me. And very rarely t could make a story funnier but usually I don’t need em. 

I get uncomfortable around incredibly sexual language, like the “P” word mentioned in the OP. But people using the normal curse words I’m mostly fine with 

[Tryhard]

5 minutes ago, Nobody said:

Society used to act as if men "owned" women in relationships, though. Women had to "obey" their husbands and this sort of crap. The opposite is not true. You can't look at this sort of stuff without taking in consideration society as a whole. IDK how it is in the US, but here it's not rare for newslines to appear about women who were beaten or even killed for trying to leave their husbands, while the opposite is almost never heard off, the worst you see is some psycho lady breaking their ex's car/cellphone or something.

that's why it made me think of some 1950's 'leave it to beaver' society

Edited October 20, 2017 by Tryhard

[Res]

3 hours ago, Arcanite said:

I agree that it probably isn't the most effective form of discipline lol I don't think everyone should beat their kids unlike my mom

But different children need different things so

Arguably no child requires physical punishment; which is what several countries have decided. Speaking of which, the moment I hopped on Facebook after reading this post, I was informed that Scotland will soon be banning smacking; thanks for creeping, Facebook!

I'm not sure I agree with it being made illegal since all parents are human and I think some otherwise great parents could be caught up in the law, but having said that, we have laws against hitting other adults. We have laws against hitting animals. That's the part which has always sobered me.

My parents raised 6 children without any kind of physical punishment; we're all independent adults with degrees and fulfilling careers who have never once crossed the wrong side of the law, so they definitely set an example to me.

38 minutes ago, Shoblongoo said:

Why am I telling you this???

I'm telling you this because you are approaching those magical years where you have all the privileges of an adult, and none of the responsibility.  As you grow older you come to appreciate that there are--for lack of a better term--"seasons of your life." For all things, a season.

Your late teens and early twenties--that is the season for testing your boundaries. Indulging the newfound priviliges of adulthood. Doing the things you're not going to be able to do once you have a house. A job. A family. A pile of bills to pay, sitting on your kitchen table.

...and you'll be there one day...

Before you get there--live. Have the time of your life. Once those years are gone you don't get them back; use them to their fullest.

This! I wholeheartedly agree.

I actually have a lot of regret because I didn't particularly ever let loose and ooh boy, being married in your 30s with kids is quite different. 

1 minute ago, Nobody said:

Society used to act as if men "owned" women in relationships, though. Women had to "obey" their husbands and this sort of crap. The opposite is not true. You can't look at this sort of stuff without taking in consideration society as a whole. IDK how it is in the US, but here it's not rare for newslines to appear about women who were beaten or even killed for trying to leave their husbands, while the opposite is almost never heard off, the worst you see is some psycho lady breaking their ex's car/cellphone or something.

I have no idea where you are, but it's still the case in the U.S., and it's arguably a less equal society here than in a country like the UK, especially in certain states.  

[Nobody]

34 minutes ago, Res said:

I have no idea where you are, but it's still the case in the U.S., and it's arguably a less equal society here than in a country like the UK, especially in certain states.  

I'm Brazilian. This is the sort of thing I never really noticed before a case happened in my university, then I started paying attention and noticed there's basically a different case in the news every day.

Edited October 20, 2017 by Nobody

[Infinite Dreams]

1 hour ago, Shoblongoo said:

there was no such thing as "behind closed doors"--if you and like five of your friends wanted to drop acid, whip out the paddles and floggers, and have a big ol' drug-fueld kinkster orgy. You could just do it in the middle of the living room--no one would bat an eye.

Holy shit. 

[Arcanite]

2 minutes ago, Res said:

My parents raised 6 children without any kind of physical punishment; we're all independent adults with degrees and fulfilling careers who have never once crossed the wrong side of the law, so they definitely set an example to me.

Rezzy got hit with the spoon and she's doing just fine

7 minutes ago, Res said:

Arguably no child requires physical punishment;

I think hitting your children should be a last resort as opposed to just outright hitting them the first time they do something wrong

Give them a chance to learn their lesson before moving to a more harsh punishment. I personally don't see anything wrong with a tap on the bottom lol

14 minutes ago, Res said:

which is what several countries have decided. Speaking of which, the moment I hopped on Facebook after reading this post, I was informed that Scotland will soon be banning smacking; thanks for creeping, Facebook!

I'm not sure I agree with it being made illegal since all parents are human and I think some otherwise great parents could be caught up in the law, but having said that, we have laws against hitting other adults. We have laws against hitting animals. That's the part which has always sobered me.

My friend told me about that same thing, interestingly enough

Hitting an animal makes no sense to me lol Hitting another adult is wrong, and doesn't exactly solve any problems (unless it's in self defense from someone hitting you in the first place)

Abusing your child and spanking your child are two different things, of course. As long as you're not straight out beating your children for no reason, or using that type of discipline as your go-to form of punishment then I don't take issue. 

[IEatLasers]

I’m not going to be spankings my children or anything like that. 

I will definitely give non-food related positive reinforcement but I don’t really like physical negative reinforcement. 

Not like everyone who does it is bad. I was spanked as a kid but idk. It hurts a lot and I wouldn’t want to purposely make my kid hurt when there’s other ways to teach them certain things. 

Plus there’s kinda that boundary of when does that become unacceptable because it’s also just a really uncomfortable thing 

[Greencapps]

51 minutes ago, Nobody said:

I'm Brazilian. This is the sort of thing I never really noticed before a case happened in my university, then I started paying attention and noticed there's basically a different case in the news every day.

Wow. It's not that bad in US or at least where I'm from. Additionally I wasn't saying that any of that was ok abuse from either side sucks and equality is what I want most. I was just pointing out that the fact that people are ok if it's a woman acting like that but if it wasn't a man he's the worst scum to ever live. It's a double standard, neither sex should be able to act that way or both of them should if you actually want equality.

Just because someone does something bad to you doesn't mean you can do it back to them or others because then you're just as bad as they are.

[Res]

37 minutes ago, Arcanite said:

I think hitting your children should be a last resort as opposed to just outright hitting them the first time they do something wrong

Give them a chance to learn their lesson before moving to a more harsh punishment. I personally don't see anything wrong with a tap on the bottom lol

Hitting an animal makes no sense to me lol Hitting another adult is wrong, and doesn't exactly solve any problems (unless it's in self defense from someone hitting you in the first place)

Just to be clear, I'd never imply that someone wasn't okay just because of how they were raised! We are all raised differently and we all react differently.

But it's interesting to ask oneself; why is hitting another adult or an animal wrong, but not a child? There have been myriad studies on the effects of spanking - including one that took place over 50 years on 160,000 children - and they've all found that there is no advantage to physical punishment.

Also, to clarify, discipline and establishing firm boundaries are absolutely essential for children, but those can take many different forms. There's sometimes a misunderstanding that being against spanking is to be a lax or anti-disciplinary parent and that's definitely not true!

21 minutes ago, IEatLasers said:

I’m not going to be spankings my children or anything like that. 

I will definitely give non-food related positive reinforcement but I don’t really like physical negative reinforcement. 

Not like everyone who does it is bad. I was spanked as a kid but idk. It hurts a lot and I wouldn’t want to purposely make my kid hurt when there’s other ways to teach them certain things. 

Plus there’s kinda that boundary of when does that become unacceptable because it’s also just a really uncomfortable thing 

Absolutely not; plenty of great parents spank for a variety of reasons! The message is, like you say, that there's many other ways to teach children things that don't have the negative outcomes of spanking.

3 minutes ago, Greencapps said:

Wow. It's not that bad in US or at least where I'm from. Additionally I wasn't saying that any of that was ok abuse from either side sucks and equality is what I want most. I was just pointing out that the fact that people are ok if it's a woman acting like that but if it wasn't a man he's the worst scum to ever live. It's a double standard, neither sex should be able to act that way or both of them should if you actually want equality.

Although men and women are equally likely to be victims of lesser domestic violence, women are more likely to have violence escalated against them; 92% of victims of murder-suicides are women, and 3 women are killed every day in the U.S. by a current or former romantic partner. 

It's similar to how 'punching up' is considered acceptable in comedic routines, but not 'punching down'; until we actually have equality, I'm think it's fine to give a pass to the person who's punching up. 

[Greencapps]

20 minutes ago, Res said:

Although men and women are equally likely to be victims of lesser domestic violence, women are more likely to have violence escalated against them; 92% of victims of murder-suicides are women, and 3 women are killed every day in the U.S. by a current or former romantic partner. 

It's similar to how 'punching up' is considered acceptable in comedic routines, but not 'punching down'; until we actually have equality, I'm think it's fine to give a pass to the person who's punching up. 

Yea but it's not like we hear about it every other day.

No. You can't mortally justify condemning a large portion of humanity because some of them are dicks to you. Being an asshole to an asshole still makes you an asshole. Racism and Sexism goes both ways and working to equality by not treating everyone as equals is backwards and dumb. Furthermore it shouldn't be an us vs them situation, at least not in the sence of pitting both sexes against eachother, because then it's  from the start promoting non-equality. We're all humans, we all deserve equality, and whether or not you have certain genitalia shouldn't determine what you can or cannot say.

[Res]

18 minutes ago, Greencapps said:

Yea but it's not like we hear about it every other day.

No. You can't mortally justify condemning a large portion of humanity because some of them are dicks to you. Being an asshole to an asshole still makes you an asshole. Racism and Sexism goes both ways and working to equality by not treating everyone as equals is backwards and dumb. Furthermore it shouldn't be an us vs them situation, at least not in the sence of pitting both sexes against eachother, because then it's  from the start promoting non-equality. We're all humans, we all deserve equality, and whether or not you have certain genitalia shouldn't determine what you can or cannot say.

I am, though.

And I'm not justifying it. It's just not an issue I'm going to expend energy getting up in arms about. Basically: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

I agree we all deserve equality! I just don't see any evidence of that in every day life. But sure, go ahead and consider the teacher an asshole for having this meme on her phone screen. 

[Greencapps]

7 minutes ago, Res said:

I agree we all deserve equality! I just don't see any evidence of that in every day life. But sure, go ahead and consider the teacher an asshole for having this meme on her phone screen. 

Never said she was an asshole. In fact I stated in an earlier post that while it doesn't give me the best first impression of her she could be a wonderful person. I stand by that. 

All I was doing was defending my point that it being socially acceptable for her to have that, but if a guy had one with penis instead of pussy it wouldn't is a double standard. 

To be fair I don't really pay attention to the news all that much but considering the political climate I'd assume there'd be so much outrage over most of them I'd hear about them regardless. If you want to continue the discussion I'd appreciate some sources so I know you didn't just pull the numbers out of thin air.

[IEatLasers]

Haha if you want some really scary numbers you should look at police report stats in Texas. 

 

Basically it’s like; if your female, you have a 70% chance to be beaten and/or raped at some point in your life” 

though that even includes people who came out way later and said “I never reported this but here’s what happened”  so some could be lying BUT some still didn’t come up or didn’t even know they were victimized (yes this happens a lot)

so yea kinda sucks.