DisobeyedCargo

Confronting my dad about failing a class

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So I'm a senior who's graduating in little more than a week. I've only got one class that I am failing, and it's not needed to graduate, but it's part of why I joined the school in the first place (high school). In Junior year I decided I didn't want to do the subject of the classes anymore for my future, but I still did my best in the class. 

Heres the thing, I've still been doing my best, and I've tried to tel my dad that, and in order to pass the class,I need a very high C, possibly a B I'm not too sure, and with my competence in the class that's realistically not possible. My dad himself says hopefully you'll pass by the grace of god.

despite this, he's clinging to any little hope that I will pass. Even hoping that the teacher will take pity on me and give me a passing grade. I just don't know what to tell him. I've tried telling him that despite my best efforts it's just not going to happen. Ive already been accepted into an honors program at college with a large amount of scholarships, the only thing that is affected is a patch on my sash that   Says I completed the program.

so what exactly do I say to my dad. And how do I confront him once I've gotten my exam back, since it's a near garunteed failure. Don't get me wrong I'm still going to do my best, but I'm not very confident in my competence.

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Your best is all you can reasonably offer to give and all that can truly be expected of you. If that's all you have to give. You can't be considered at fault for any failures if you're putting in that much effort.

I apologize for not having more helpful insight for you. But I hope you at least feel better with the words I have shared.

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It's rather hard to say something without knowing the person in question, but by the way you are talking it seems that whenever you try to explain it to him he disregards it or might think that you are exagerating or underestimating yourself. Is that it? If that's so then you might try explaining to him exactly why you aren't doing okay in that class "I can't do x because I need y, but to find y..." that kind of thing, so he sees the reason. I don't think it is about making him lose hope in you passing but making him understand that failing has an equal or bigger chance of happening, to make him see it as a possibility more than a certain future.

But as I said I don't know him, your relationship or previous conversations, so you might have already tried this.

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I wouldn't worry too much about it if you don't need it to graduate.

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I mean, you could just throw up all over the paper and escape that way. Or "forget to write your name or something. No? Oh well.

Joking aside, I guess you'll just have to swallow your pride and tough it out.

Im sure when you get the rest of your results he'll happily overlook one D or whatever it is (Not like he's my folks or anything)

But uh, good luck and may the only stuff on the test be what you know.

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A way I got my parents to relate to my struggles was trying to explain the material to them or have them try to understand the material, often once they realize the stuff you're doing they're understanding and supportive. Heck my parents barely understood what was in my middle school math textbooks, and I'm taking tier 3 and 4 college math classes in the next school year.

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You could always retake the class online, if it's possible, over the summer. Even if you can't, you're on your way to college. If you don't need it to graduate, then it's no big deal. Besides, you and your dad will most likely forget about it in the future anyway.

I agree with what @Light Strategist said, by the way. If there's anything to take away from this, it's what he said.

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23 minutes ago, LucarioGamer812 said:

A way I got my parents to relate to my struggles was trying to explain the material to them or have them try to understand the material, often once they realize the stuff you're doing they're understanding and supportive. Heck my parents barely understood what was in my middle school math textbooks, and I'm taking tier 3 and 4 college math classes in the next school year.

I've done that already. I've shown it the kind of material we are working on which is what a typical Sophmore would be working on in an engineering dynamics course. He has literally no idea what any of it means.

my main problem is that he keeps clinging own to false hope and is treating it as a much bigger deal than it really is. My major doesn't really need me to understand fundamentals of engineering and it's not needed to graduate.

its more along the fact that I put four years of work in this program and that it would be nice to see the result. But I've already realized that what this program teaches isn't what I want to do anymore. 

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just do it and get it over with, not much else to do, if you are only worried about your dad's reaction then just let him know and get it over with, it isn't that big a deal, failure is a part of success. He will get over it, in two months and he won't even remember the class happened.

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Just be up forward and straight faced, don't say anything other than I'm failing, it's going to take some courage but it's the best way to be clear about something. 

Trust me it was nerve wracking when I had to tell my dad that I lost my scholarship because my GPA went from a 2.8 to a 2.73 causing me to loose 2k in financial aid.

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Tell the truth and honestly keep in mind that this

5 hours ago, DisobeyedCargo said:

Ive already been accepted into an honors program at college with a large amount of scholarships

is all that matters.

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You could say something like, "Look I know you want me to pass the class, but I can't make any promises that I will. I still got into Honors regardless so even if I don't pass it won't set me back." Kinda helps your dad with his hope and you're still honest about it.

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Whatever you do, be honest and straightforward about it.  Assuming he's reasonable, he won't kick you out of the house and disown you.

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