Corrupt a wish: FE edition

[DragonFlames]

Orgies. Lots and lots of orgies.
Though whether or not that's a bad thing differs from person to person, I guess.
Also, the fan backlash will be immense due to the game not adhering to "modern values" and "proper conduct" when it comes to the hanky-panky, thus resulting in the game getting review-bombed to hell and back, going down in history as one of the most hated games of all time.

Is it possible, @Emperor_Siegfried made it his personal mission to make one FE-related wish that CAN'T be corrupted? Because it's getting harder and harder to do so.

I wish the "I'm a prick for no reason"-type Archer character (Takumi, Innes, Shinon) wasn't so popular with fans.

[Emperor_Siegfried]

Granted.  Now the older female teachers who tutor the main protagonist are rightfully the most popular character archetype.

5 hours ago, DragonFlames said:

 

Is it possible, @Emperor_Siegfriedmade it his personal mission to make one FE-related wish that CAN'T be corrupted? Because it's getting harder and harder to do so.

It is a source of entertainment for me for sure. In the eyes of @The_antithesis at least I sure accomplished it in wishing for a high school AU.  Not going to stop me from trying a second time though.

Speaking of which, I wish the next Fire Emblem game was a jukebox musical with the characters singing primarily American love songs from various decades.

Edited April 6, 2019 by Emperor_Siegfried

[Ercdouken]

Granted, the entire game is a rhythm game done like the very last mission in Drakengard 3, and just one song is the entire song. If you miss a single note, you have to start the entire game all over again.

I wish a non-sword FE character would be added to Smash Bros.

[Emperor_Siegfried]

Granted.  It's Leila and she starts at 999% damage whenever she spawns.

I wish for a Fire Emblem game where you could manually chose how much money you want to bet in the arena.

[WeAreNewcastle1053]

Granted, that leads to massive save-scumming, as people bet large amounts of money then reset if their battler loses the fight. Because of this, Mr. Resetti appears in Fire Emblem and deletes the save files of those that reset too much, even if they merely reset to bring back a character that died in a Classic run.

I wish characters in Fire Emblem could fight even without weapons (such as using their fists).

[DragonFlames]

19 hours ago, Emperor_Siegfried said:

It is a source of entertainment for me for sure. In the eyes of @The_antithesis at least I sure accomplished it in wishing for a high school AU.  Not going to stop me from trying a second time though.

I KNEW it. XD

The above wish will be granted, but just like the untransformed Laguz in Radiant Dawn, bare-handed fighting will deal miniscule damage, you can't double or crit, and you'll get recoil damage from any class that wields a shield or heavy(er) armour due to the characters' hands and feet hurting. And that will be an effect like poison where you'll take damage over time with overly long and unskippable animations. Also, the character will complain to you non-stop to give him a weapon. And they'll do this every time you make a move that doesn't involve trading a weapon to that character. EVERY. TIME!

Why are my wish corruptions always so gosh darn evil? Jeez...

Anyway, I wish there was a Fire Emblem game that had a betrayal function, like if you're not good friends with that character or / because you're not using them enough, they'll leave and join your enemies in the next battle. Of course, your own character if present would have that option as well.

Edited April 7, 2019 by DragonFlames

[Emperor_Siegfried]

Granted.  You run the risk of applying this situation to everyone who is relevant to the plot and those characters are all randomly generated.  With this in place, if you ever lose the loyalty of any of these particular characters, you can't progress the game.  Since they're all randomly generated, there's no way to be sure which characters are okay to lose and which ones aren't.  Even better, it has the largest cast in a Fire Emblem game ever starting the player off with 50 characters and you get 5 new characters for each new chapter across the 30 chapters.

I wish there was a Fire Emblem game that was heavily based on the Steamed Hams meme.

[Hawkwing]

It's a choice based adventure game that is extremely railroaded in what you can do, Skinner kills a family of cooks in order to steal their cow meat, he burns down the house by using a fire spell to get rid of the bodies, and you can't play it again because of permadeath.

I wish that there was a Fire Emblem game that has a manga/comic book aesthetic to it.

[Ottservia]

Granted but the character designer and art director is hiro mashima with animated cutscenes done by A1 pictures which cranks the fanservice up to 11 and all the girls look the damn same.

I wish Corrin and Selena's supports were actually good and not just generic tsunderexHarem MC

[Hawkwing]

It is now the very best support conversation in the history of fire emblem. The writers had to sacrifice all their time, resources, and money into making it, meaning that Fates is now the most bare-bones game in existence. IS goes out of business a day later.

I wish that there was a hack-n-slash game about Alm's friends dying early on, and he goes on a one-man rampage to avenge them. It would skip past the Deliverance storyline, he would conquer Rigel on his own, Rudolf would die a violent death before he could reveal the plot twist, and Duma and Alm would die in a mutual-kill. Alm would be able to wield every single weapon type and loot the bodies of his enemies, you have to be methodical in how you approach and attack certain foes, and you would heal yourself in a similar vein to Far Cry 2.

[Emperor_Siegfried]

Granted.  It's basically Fire Emblem Warriors but you only play as Alm and there's no variety to the mission structure other than killing as many enemies as possible even in stages where it might nto even make sense.  On top of that, Duma is the only boss in the game and he's basically just an average enemy but with health bumped up 10 times.  Afterwards, there's no replay value or unlockables that make the game worth revisiting.

I wish the next Fire Emblem game was the next poster's worst nightmare.

[Hawkwing]

Spoiler

Vore kidnapping rape, then?

I wish that there was a Fire Emblem game that made me forget that I typed that.

Edited April 9, 2019 by Hawkwing

[Arcphoenix]

6 minutes ago, Hawkwing said:

  Hide contents

Vore kidnapping rape, then?

I wish that there was a Fire Emblem game that made me forget that I typed that.

After you play it, you literally cannot have anything on your mind other than that game, and you can't just put it out of your head.

I wish we get a sequel to TMS #FE properly marketed as a Persona game with FE inspired mechanics and features so that it gets the right target audience and that it gets a few more sequels due to the success of this one.

[Emperor_Siegfried]

Granted.  It's newly targeted audience is the Dora the Explorer fandom.  And since it gets a few more sequels after the initial's success, characters from Dora leak over into the main Fire Emblem series.  Because of this, the franchise itself becomes more accommodating to its new target demographic.

I wish there was a Fire Emblem game that had no war or conflict in it whatsoever and it was all about three Lord characters coming over to each other's castles to have tea time and socialize with one another.  The castles are lavishly detailed and take the best elements from all the famous castles in the world and a true splendor to behold upon visiting.  After all the tea time sessions have been had, the game ends with a peaceful resolution to a love triangle the main player finds him/herself in (with multiple possible endings of course).

[AnonymousSpeed]

Granted, but, like, Three Houses already looks like a persona game, and they just kinda stick with this trend...forever. There are no actual tactical games after this.

And they only include Archanaea characters.

26 minutes ago, Hawkwing said:

  Reveal hidden contents

Vore kidnapping rape, then?

 

That's kind of a weird nightmare. Do you want to talk about something?

I wish for a Fire Emblem game where I work on the support writing. Like as an actual job that I get paid for.

[Hawkwing]

Granted. You only get to work with one character, and you're not given any context about any of the other characters besides being told their gimmick. You get $20 a week

1 hour ago, AnonymousSpeed said:

That's kind of a weird nightmare. Do you want to talk about something?

Spoiler

Well, originally I typed "or" inbetween those words, before realizing what vore kidnapping would look like, and decided "what they hey? Why not disturb someone and combine them all in one!"

It could have been worse. I almost posted it without putting it in a spoiler first.

Fortunately, I have a ton of brain bleach to spare. I especially stocked up after deciding to look up random stuff on the internet out of sheer morbid curiosity

I learned the hard way that you do not look up random stuff on the internet.

I also learned the hard way that you never type "anime" in front of anything.

Least I got a joke out of that experience.

...

I also really wanted to post that picture. Marking the second time that has happened on this thread.

...

I wish that paint.net wasn't so fidgety, so I could make more Fire Emblem Memes.

Edited April 9, 2019 by Hawkwing
F*ck you, auto-correct.

[AnonymousSpeed]

Granted, paint.net is now burning hot! Whoo! That's just how I like it! My hard drive is a thread to Californian wildlife! And now yours is too!

I wish I got paid $40 dollars a week instead.

[DragonFlames]

You do, but all the character's gimmicks you get to work with are complete crap and they have zero chemistry with each other, so it's almost impossible to write any support that makes even an ounce of sense. You also only get your money if you write every support in a way that pleases your boss, but you have no clue what your boss even wants out of the supports, so you're left completely in the dark.

On 7.4.2019 at 7:44 PM, Emperor_Siegfried said:

Granted.  You run the risk of applying this situation to everyone who is relevant to the plot and those characters are all randomly generated.  With this in place, if you ever lose the loyalty of any of these particular characters, you can't progress the game.  Since they're all randomly generated, there's no way to be sure which characters are okay to lose and which ones aren't.  Even better, it has the largest cast in a Fire Emblem game ever starting the player off with 50 characters and you get 5 new characters for each new chapter across the 30 chapters.

Okay, now you're trying to out-evil me. XD

I wish Fire Emblem games had a victory jingle that plays when you successfully complete a map.

[Arcphoenix]

4 hours ago, DragonFlames said:

I wish Fire Emblem games had a victory jingle that plays when you successfully complete a map.

This is the victory jingle. No, you can’t skip it. This is also the case for all past and future games

I wish for Granblue Fantasy and Fire Emblem Heroes to have a collab

Edited April 10, 2019 by Arcphoenix

[DragonFlames]

More waifus. More and more and more and more waifus until the entire world gets buried underneath them. And everything will be exclusively about waifus and gacha games until the universe collapses because of the sheer waifu-ness of it all. (I dunno, that victory jingle broke me. Let it be known that @Arcphoenix broke me.)
Joking aside, I heard that Granblue Fantasy has a loli Alchemist that is actually a dude inside a loli's body. What. The hell?

I wish Fire Emblem Three Houses had a secret fourth house.

[Azure the Scale Tipper]

Granted, but unlocking it requires $24.99 and unlocks a fourth path that is akin to Revelations. Golden Path b.s., slow level design, getting everyone, the works.

I wish Nowi was:

1. Older

2. Less designed like a stripper

3. More mature

[Emperor_Siegfried]

Granted.  Now Nowi looks like Mary's Mother from SpongeBob.

I wish the next Fire Emblem game was like a Yu-Gi-Oh! anime dubbed by 4Kids

[Hawkwing]

The SRPG elements are replaced with card game mechanics. The rules are extremely complicated and beginner- and even veteran-player unfriendly, and it doesn't even have the awesome artwork that Cipher is known for. There is a lot of censorship, and while it removes the gratuitous fanservice, it can get ridiculous what they changed. There is also no swearing, and not even mild "darns" and "dangs" are allowed.

I wish that when a character dies, instead of just saying "X died on level Y" in their ending, it had their graves epitaph.

[DragonFlames]

Granted, but the graves epitaphs are extremely silly and hilarious (kind of like these), thus encouraging players to kill off as many characters as possible just to see them all. But the game itself is so hard that losing even a single character can mean a complete restart.

I wish Fire Emblem would stop having a horse fetish (i.e. making mounted units the only useful units in the game)

 

Edited April 12, 2019 by DragonFlames

[Hawkwing]

Granted. Mounted units are still the most useful units in the game, but it's a platonic relationship now.

I wish that support conversations that had crying weren't so awkward to read.