Corrupt a wish: FE edition

[Emperor_Siegfried]

In all their wisdom, Nintendo decided to effectively remake Hey You, Pikachu! but now with Byleth in place of Pikachu.  And Byleth is completely expressionless and speechless, thus making interacting with them a complete gamble every time.

I wish the next FE game had a Collector's Edition that was more expensive than Saints Row 4: Super Dangerous Wad-Wad Edition.

[PostZordem]

Granted. FE17: Gold of the Gods Edition is priced at an astounding $10 Million Dollars and the perks to having this collector's edition are the gold-infused case + cartridge, DLC (that would've gone for like, 10 or 20 bucks), a 2021 Volkswagen Golf with a year's worth of insurance already covered, a Mansion in Beverly Hills, a full scale replica of the main lord of FE17, an all-expense paid trip to Nintendo's Headquarters in Japan, and a Thank-You card signed by none other than Shigeru Miyamoto himself. However, Nintendo decides to pull another 35th Mario Anniversary on us and makes this special edition of FE17 available for only 1 week. Since nobody has the cash or is insane enough to buy such an expensive game that would usually sell at $60 MSRP for the Standard Edition, FE17: Gold of the Gods Edition goes without a buyer and is never heard of again. 

I wish that the next mainline FE would have a route split in the same vein of Fates and Three Houses/Hopes.

[Emperor_Siegfried]

Upon launch, the game does indeed offer a route split which goes in one of 17 possible choices only for the route to last for exactly one chapter after which the story is brought back into focus in the game's originally intended predetermined story.  Every route however has an entirely different map however that leaves a clue to where playing the other routes might lead to a greater end that could be unlocked.  Once a player beats all 17 routes however, instead of credits, they are treated to a five minute trailer detailing the game's DLC where a new route is going to be released for $1.99 each or an annual expansion pass of $49.99.  Said DLC consists of 208 new routes over the course of four years and is the only way to unlock the true ending and final level that has been teased after this journey.  All of them which are at minimum 3 hours long to beat.  Finally, even if you manage to have all the routes beaten and you go through all of the routes and get to the fabled final boss that has been rumored for the last four years, the player has to go through a meticulous one on one boss fight where the main lord has to take three turns to at best deal one point of damage at a time and the boss has 8,575,758,285 hit points.  Finally after all of that, even if someone is crazy enough to at long defeat this fabled monster it legend, the player is taken through the mighty main gates into a binding white light before fading to an FMV cutscene of the game's scenario planner who simply bows saying, "Domo arigato.".  The screen then fades to white again as the word "fin" appears in the lower right hand corner of the screen and then... That's it.  Not only is that the final reward for going through all of that, but your console you were playing on is now locked in that screen for all eternity.  Not even modding your console is enough to break out of the screen, you are only left with that hollow reminder of victory after so much hard work and effort only to see your means of entertainment from ever fading from view again.  You the player now have to live with that neverending reminder of what your act of unmitigated dedication to at last receive a that taste of awe-inspiring victory only to be remdinded how it can bring about the folly of the time you spent... Nothing to say about your wallet of course.

I wish the next game was only possible to buy physically and digitally on the MyNintendo store.

[Acacia Sgt]

Granted. Sales are low because not everyone uses MyNintendo, so the game flops.

I wish Engage would confirm more legacy characters.

[Emperor_Siegfried]

All the legacy characters are the first bosses from each respective game.  And they are introduced so late into the game that they are too weak to do anything of value and have such lousy stat growths that trying to level them up into becoming something resembling competent isn't worth it.

I wish the next game was an NFT collectable art experience.

[Acacia Sgt]

Granted. You must pay every time you use it.

I wish next FE game was a remake.

[Emperor_Siegfried]

It's a 1:1 remake of FE4.

I wish the next game took place on a giant egg from which serpentine monsters emerge to herald the great scrambling the characters try to escape from only to discover too late they are bound for the deepest damnable depths of the compost they condemned themselves to.

[Acacia Sgt]

Granted. It tanks and the series dies.

I wish all the older FE's get translated.

[Emperor_Siegfried]

They are translated but released on their respective original cartridges they were sold on in the far future where Nintendo prevents all people around the world from playing on third-party legacy consoles that would be capable of doing so under penalty of death despite being the only way to play them.

I wish Sommie outfits were the default outfit for every character including the villains.

[Acacia Sgt]

Granted, but now they all act as if they were Sommie.

I wish Edelgard discourse would end.

[Emperor_Siegfried]

Now people don't even know who Edelgard is or why she's part of the franchise for that matter.

I wish the next game had a crafting system deeper and more complex than Tears of the Kingdom.