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Chaos reigns when I take the reins! - Let's play Tear Ring saga, Ironman mode, while being terrible at Fire Emblem!


Saint Rubenio

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Kept you waiting, huh? Happy Christmas and a Merry new year and all that.

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

. I wasn't expecting anything as good as a mainline FE, but this is a tad worse than what I was hoping for.

Achievement Unlocked!
"Critical thinking"

It took the rest of us over a year to realize that.

 

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

4CjuFbK.png

Healing for the filler, from the other filler.

"Filler-on-Filler Action"

 

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You know, I don't think I'll get another chance to say this, so... what's up with the name Seamus? You'd think it's a pretty self-explanatory name. First there's "seam", then there's "us". So how do you pronounce it? Seam-us? No, fuck you, it's Shame-us. Why?

I've only heard it once, and it was pronounced "SHEE-mus". Though it's such an uncommon name IRL that I doubt anyone knows for sure.

 

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Man, Lee could've taken a critical hit from a physical attacker and survived. I know these guys are pathetic, but still. That's impressive.

Is it too soon to say Lee is the Marcus of this LP?

 

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The game rewards me with this great level up. Only so I'd lose focus in my glee, and fail to realise the terrible mistake I'd made.

Don't you mean "To lose focus on your gLee?"

 

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

5 - What is this scene?

It's another opportunity for Eugen to be awesome, of course!

 

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

qklAcct.pnguDH9QEh.png

Wait, you actually have a secret shop in your house? With an Anna copycat included?

She looks more like an orange-haired Lyn to me.

 

6 hours ago, Dayni said:

Yadda yadda magic is everything

Yadda yadda more than magic my friend

 

Worthashot counter is at 6 if anyone gives a shit.

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16 hours ago, Dayni said:

I mean, he's still got child sacrifice on his resume. But no, his hat is what's important!

All part of the (humorously over-the-top) corrupt lawyer act I was going for. Loosely based off the "Black Rage Defense" used in this instance. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1993_Long_Island_Rail_Road_shooting#"Black_rage"_defense where the guilty party pretty much argued that slavery and other past wrongs against African Americans lead to him intricately planning a shooting where he murdered several people because of a spontaneous expression of his rage. You know. Because spontaneous expressions of rage lead to several weeks of planning. Naturally it didn't work and he is serving 315 years and six months to life imprisonment. Effectually, he comes up for parole in 2309. Provided someone finds a way to extend his life that long. Hatboy obviously copped it a bit worse, seeing as he got the death-penalty. Or maybe that's lenient.

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Part 18 - Freedom is a lie.

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Spoiler
On 4/1/2019 at 6:55 PM, Mad-manakete said:

What would happen if Merlinus was on 4chan?

He'd get banned for trapshaming, no doubt.

I was more going for "corrupt lawyer" speech. Mostly because my brother wanted to be a lawyer, but used to make stupid arguments. So I used to mock how he'd go in court with such idiocy as trying to prevent his client from going to jail for manslaughter by revealing the killing was pre-meditated, or arguments based on another country's constitution. I had more than enough of the US election when it was going on and people here were way too invested in it despite having no way of influencing it. Lost friends for daring to put forth the notion it's not my Country, and consequently I have no horse in that race. Not good enough for some apparently.

I don't know which country you're from, but I'm pretty sure one shouldn't be seriously supporting anyone in another country's elections. Like here, in Spain, all we had to go on for the US elections was what the TV said, and all the TV said was that Trump was nuts and nothing at all about Clinton. And the US is the country we hear from the most. We're right next to Portugal, but if you only watched TV you'd know absolutely nothing about it.

Magic hurts in the game. But to be honest, I love Gaiden and Echoes about as much as one can love a game without going into creepy territory. Maybe because they went and broke every convention of Fire Emblem (well not really, but they're very unique). I have a soft spot for that oddball sequel that is different from the rest of the series, whether Zelda II, Metroid II, Castlevania II, or Super Mario Bros. 2. Gaiden is one of those on many levels, with it's unbreakable weapons (which Fates brought back), minimum damage of one, two routes at once that join at the end, non-human enemies (though that's came back), skirmishes (again, it's returned), the villager trainee class, the branching promotions for villagers, the multi-tier promotions, archers that are actually useful. Yep. There's a magic there. When I discovered Echoes was going to be a thing, it was probably the most hyped I was ever for a game in the series... albeit noting I only started in 2011.

That's why I love TRS. It does that, but polishing off both of Gaiden's crippling flaws that kept me from being too interested in the game: god-awful map design (there are some bad maps here, like in every game, but at least it's not every one of them like in Gaiden) and tiny playable cast (which hinders replayability).

I don't know. Let's ask J. Jonah Jameson if any facet of the media would ever be run be people with an agenda. He seems pretty on the ball about Spider-Man being a menace.

Don't compare JJJ to real life media harpies. JJJ's the best thing ever. Just check out his laugh! Nobody with such a laugh could possibly be anything but the most joyful person alive!

Just makes me think of Carnival Barkers. Except he ain't running no side-show.

Poor Barker. Noone takes him seriously.

Is Cloud Strife going to be here? Or maybe Ogma seeing as he kind of looks like him in FE 11 (well his battle sprite at least)?

Who's that?

quick google search

Ooohhhh that Cloud. Silly me, I should've known. It's the surname that confused me.

You'd be too. That was hot sauce. He's running for actual water.

Hah! That's hilarious.

Shouldn't that thing be buried and rusted to hell?

Maybe it was just a publicity stunt, and he only buried it there for Narcus to find it. Then Narcus was useless and couldn't do it.

Codha wanted to weigh in on these jokes, but he couldn't find scales that would accommodate.

10/10 I died.

Looking ridiculous as usual I see.

She finds ways to do it, even with her pegasus.

Have to wonder what would have happened if you actually had a thousands of soldiers.

Game over, that's what.

I've got a battle axe that looks an awful lot like that hammer. Maybe it's been a hammer and I've been using it wrong. Wait... how can I NOT use a battle axe wrong in the current year? I mean, without being a murderer. Uh, let's forget that.

You could use it to chop wood looking like a badass. Or play the "walk around with my axe and see how long I last till I'm arrested" game.

It's like he's some sort of ogre or troll or something, and has superhuman size and strength to make up for his debilitating face.

Poor horse. I mean, poor Norton.

I disagree. If the other one was smart, they wouldn't have put themself in range of death unless they had a way of finishing the foe... like the cooperation of their partner.

The one who warped behind Seamus knew her partner was a dumbass and decided not to take any chances.

More like "unLeesh".

Ack!

Are they building a wall in the desert? To stop your guys getting into their country? Maybe we can get a scathing news article on them.

BREAKING NEWS boat man bad.

Merlinus is never there when you need him.

And you need him so rarely, one'd think he'd be ready when the occasion finally arrived!

Same as Sean being pronounced Shawn. Irish people.

Wait, seriously? I thought Sean was pronounced, y'know, Sean? Sean Bean? Sin Bin? You tellin' me it's SHAAAAAAAAAAAAUN Bin instead? C'mon!

He is their superior physicalee and spiritualee.

And emotionalee!

Apparently, even you can't have Linde be your first casualty in two different games.

Hey, there's still time.

As for the other, guy I imagine arabic Frollo put it best.

9YvxbFR.png (seriously, what's up with that translation?)

Hilarious. I don't understand why he'd do that, but I'm glad he did.

Oh the irony.

Right?

The extra HP may be a good crutch to leen on in an emergency.

Staph it! I'm going to leet your house on fire with you inside it if you don't stop! And you cannot continue living your life of leesure without a house!

Maybe he meant small as in their collective IQ score? Would explain the hero of the battle.

I died. You killed me, and I died.

Eugen is all knowing apparently. Either that or one of the listed things that were skipped over was the key and Narcus was still working on the list.

I like the "Eugen is literally God" theory. Let's go for that.

So is it the child sacrifice or the hat that makes him chosen? Curiosity. And chosen for what specifically? To be an asshole and die?

He's chosen for wearing the Hat of Gerxel. See, Guenchaos thinks he has it all figured out, but the truth is, Gerxel lives in Dagon's head. His face pops out of the top of his head, so he has to hide it with the Hat. He's the true Pontiff!

R.I.P. Seamus. BBQ'd like Sigurd.

Ouch. Too soon.

Why does the grandaughter of the water mage use fire? I can't even come up with a joke about what she tries to be because of this. My game is ruined. Thanks a lot Linde.

There's no water magic in this game, that's why. It'd be awesome if there was, but there isn't.

Told you those zombies were movie extras. You invaded Hollywood by mistake.

Pffffft... well, nothing has changed. I'm still going to be tearing this place apart. Heh, tearing, get it, cause the game's called Tear Ring... uh...

What is it with you and Jagens? First Marcus now Raquel. If Arran didn't die (not that he didn't get better story-wise), he'd have somehow ended up in your end-team wouldn't he?

Uhh... this is from my latest FE12 run, which I finished just days before I started this LP.

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One of the dead guys presumably. They don't need it.

Makes sense

Are we in a Holee war?

Halt! I will not allow these puns to continue! My patience is at its leemit! You will stop now, or I shall viciouslee punish you!

Elfire, Dark Fire.
Now gypsy it's your turn.
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What worries me is that someone, at some point in time, has sent a Frollo love card to their significant other. Please tell me it wasn't you.

Looks like an underage Anna copycat too. Between that and the locked in the basement part, I think someone better call Chris Hanson.

Christ.

 

On 4/1/2019 at 7:00 PM, Dayni said:

Yeah, I hadn't commented on the nice format changes. Not that I needed the massive green title, but whatever.

You may not, but someone may, and that's enough for me. It's green because green's the best color, shut up it is.

I mean, they're erstaz units from Kaga era.

Neither of those two are Kaga era.

Erstaz. That's a nice word I didn't know. I'll be sure to keep it in mind.

I mean, he's still got child sacrifice on his resume. But no, his hat is what's important!

The hat's the real deal. It is the true menace!

Well, considering how short he was I'd heard a lot about how much of a pain he was. Didn't have an experience because I never played with the Xbox 360.

Does he jump all over the place there?

Man, I'm kind of surprised you didn't get any of those mentioned. Also I'm pretty sure there aren't that many ninjas.

Sure felt that way to me!

Though I wish you'd gotten all my Raighs because I've gotten enough for two lifetimes

Hey, I wouldn't want that either. A 5 star Raigh'd been fine, but other than that...

Aside from that, I completely understand not being interested.

Honestly, it needs less PvP and more PvE that doesn't make me want to cry out of pity for the enemy.

Considering the only real life person called Matthis I've heard of is referred to as "Mad Dog", I'm not so sure.

Does he suffer from the Matthis syndrome, too?

Well, not quite what I thought, but still.

Hey, keep in mind that's just my interpretation of Marth standing unarmed in front of a dropped sword (which couldn't be Lorenz's because he was a General with a javelin). It's not the ultimate truth.

I mean, if he did that, he could have stabbed himself in a non-lethal manner, then found a healer in the village.

He found Wrys. Wrys is always there when you'd be very glad to take him with you.

Well he's the equivalent of Lilina being killed in Chapter 8: Just early and applicable enough that it will deliver.

Amazing.

I mean, he's interested in making Zoa great again and locking up kids.

When Judgrali immigrants left thinking they wouldn't have to deal with another evil dragon and its cult. They were wrong.

They found something worse: the Hatman, Dagon.

One of your party will do that though. No need for me to.

Damnit, Kate!

I mean, he does seem like the kind of person to have You're So Vain playing in the background and think the song is about him.

Now you made me dislike him more. Good job.

You know, those pegasi look nice.

I think this image would make a neat album cover.

Hmmmm...

K93Cp8p.png

Legit.

And with that the game just got.... easier?

Somewhat. That levin sword's not unbreakable.

Also relevant(ish).

Dude, don't jinx it! I don't want that to happen to her!

Yadda yadda magic is everything

THE ANIME

It's more than nothing though.

I guess.

That makes cents.

500 cents, to be precise.

My prediction: This will keep happening.

Just to really screw with Maruj.

The guy's lost everything, don't you think he deserves to at least prove his mettle as a mage?

Jaffar, is that you?

I can't say I get the joke here.

Well I'm sorry that Irish pronunciation doesn't 100% fit English spelling, thank you!

Keep in mind I'm spanish. It's already difficult enough to get a hang of all the neutral English shenanigans!

Runan is the one thing they want dead above all else.

His plan was obvious, but canto isn't on all cavs and that's where his plan failed.

If this was FE4, things would've ended differently.

It seems like Runan took that shmaltzy advice of Dance like nobody's watching to heart.

And it worked! He won.

Well, that's one way to surprise us.

Poor Seamus regardless.

He really didn't deserve that.

That's beautiful right there.

Ain't it? Pure art.

She's proving that maybe I was wrong to not pick a certain way soon.

Nah, if it's what I think it is, it's not really worth doing either way.

Speed would have been the little cherry, but still a good combination.

And she got some of that later, so all's well!

Here I was thinking she'd be miles above Maruj.

Not miles, but she already is above him.

Oh no, he was Joseph Fritzel all along

Oh, God, that case's horrifying! He even looks a little like Best NPC... Argh!

It's more likely he's security and has to see the key to let customers in or something.

What kind of security could a cross-eyed old fart provide?

I would argue most of those, but at least he more reliable without a horse than most of them by the look of it.

Runan's good.

Not yet.

With levels like that it'll be soon enough though.

My poor army... they'll have crippling emotional issues before long.

 

On 4/1/2019 at 7:10 PM, Ruminant said:

That's true, I misspoke. He's probably there, doing stuff off-screen, though, right?

I guess. It's not like I've heard of him again since that scene.

Barca in this context more likely refers to the ancient general of Carthage, Hannibal Barca, whose surname comes from a Semitic root meaning "to shine" or "lightning." Considering his country's name is Canaan, this is fitting because the Phoenicians, who established Carthage, lived in the historical region called Canaan.

That actually makes a lot more sense that Barker, but I still think we won out by the end. I never could've taken Boat seriously.

Wait, Hannibal... No, it can't be.

Portrait_hannibal_fe04.png

Kaga named two characters after the same guy?! I can't believe this act of laziness!

Oh, it's protoDougy. Not quite as horrible to recruit as the next two bearded Generals of the series, but...

That one day he lost was the day he spent looking for the key in the middle of the desert.

Sounds fair.

I'm sure you figured this already, but it's gotta be something to do with Meriel's animation specifically that causes the flashbangs, considering how they didn't show up until now and several screens of Meriel attacking things have them in this update.

I thought it was Starlight, but then she did it again with the fire tome, so... I have no idea. It's clearly Meriel, that much I'm certain about.

4 - Maybe that was one of the things he ordered him to do when the game cut away between items 5 and 27 on the list?

Of course, that still doesn't explain how he knows about a Thieves' Guild, much less how he already knew about it all the way back then.

Let's just leave it at "Eugen's God". It does make a lot of sense.

On the bright side, even though it might have seemed in vain, Seamus's sacrifice means that we actually get to take out the asshat this part instead of letting him continue to terrorize Canaanite generals and generally be a thorn in everyone's sides.

I still can't say I'm too pleased with this outcome, overall.

Seamus really didn't deserve what happened to him.

I'd argue that Fire Emblem does have some sexism in terms of gameplay balance (i.e. how female Myrmidons are almost unilaterally worse than their male equivalents; for this game, compare Julia vs. Vega), but the ubiquity of good Pegasus Knights among other factors means that every game has plenty of good units of both genders. Fire Emblem being in the "Both Favored in Different Ways" section on the "Game-Favored Gender" TV Tropes page is a pretty good summation, I think.

I honestly like it better this way. Sure, women aren't better in every single way, but they aren't worse in every single way either. Balance, that's the key word here. Not to mention, there are plenty of badass women in the series.

As far as the in-script sexism goes, I basically agree with the analysis that aside from Zieg and the innkeeper (the latter reading more like a coping mechanism to deal with the deaths of her husband and son, albeit not a particularly good one, than anything), it's used as a quick way to indicate that "this character is a jerk."

Yes, I figured that was the case for the innkeeper. We'll see more proof supporting this idea today.

 

On 4/1/2019 at 11:13 PM, BrightBow said:

Richard being an asshole isn't really the problem. Though at this point it's probably too early to use some more accurate descriptors.
Hmmm, do you know that Aethin rewrote some stuff in regards to him later on?

Oh, so he did! I was aware that he rewrote some parts of the script, but I didn't know that was one of them.

Perhaps it'd be more appropriate to say that Aethin's Richard is one of the most interesting characters in my eyes, then.

 

On 5/1/2019 at 1:13 AM, Franp3 said:

Kept you waiting, huh? Happy Christmas and a Merry new year and all that.

Ah, took you long enough, damnit. Although, perhaps that's why I haven't lost anybody yet. It makes sense: the only times I lost units were when you were there.

...YOU are the RNGoddess, aren't you? I've got you all figured out!

Achievement Unlocked!
"Critical thinking"

It took the rest of us over a year to realize that.

Hahahahah... well of course. I'm a genius, and all that.

Ruben, death count.

Shut up, me! Let me win for once, will you?

"Filler-on-Filler Action"

She's 15 years old. Out of curiousity, have you ever read the rest of the LP, or have you just jumped in and started to reply as if you knew what the heck is going on?

I've only heard it once, and it was pronounced "SHEE-mus". Though it's such an uncommon name IRL that I doubt anyone knows for sure.

I mostly heard it in Family Guy clips that Youtube bombards me with every day. There's a guy there who's called Seamus. Imagine my face when I first heard someone say his name and they went "SHAYMUS".

Is it too soon to say Lee is the Marcus of this LP?

Go back and read, damnit! Lee being good has never been a surprise!

Don't you mean "To lose focus on your gLee?"

Oh, not another one! I'm going to give you some leeway, because I know how you operate, but be careful, leest I have you kicked out!

It's another opportunity for Eugen to be awesome, of course!

Okay, so you do know Eugen's amazing. That's really all you need to know about this game.

She looks more like an orange-haired Lyn to me.

Now that you say it... underage, redhead Lyn. Sounds about right.

Yadda yadda more than magic my friend

Heroes jokes!

Worthashot counter is at 6 if anyone gives a shit.

I knew I could count on you, after all.

 

On 5/1/2019 at 9:53 AM, eclipse said:

You have quite the talent with the ladies.  And Runan.  Hmmm. . .Runan, is there something about yourself that you're not telling us? :P:

Frankly? Norton's case worries me more.

 

On 5/1/2019 at 11:47 AM, Mad-manakete said:

All part of the (humorously over-the-top) corrupt lawyer act I was going for. Loosely based off the "Black Rage Defense" used in this instance. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1993_Long_Island_Rail_Road_shooting#"Black_rage"_defense where the guilty party pretty much argued that slavery and other past wrongs against African Americans lead to him intricately planning a shooting where he murdered several people because of a spontaneous expression of his rage.

Well, if it's that easy, then I too can go out and murder ten people claiming I did it because "the guys at the forum were mean to me when I killed around fifty people in a videogame".

...on second thought, I think I'll just continue writing updates.

You know. Because spontaneous expressions of rage lead to several weeks of planning. Naturally it didn't work and he is serving 315 years and six months to life imprisonment. Effectually, he comes up for parole in 2309. Provided someone finds a way to extend his life that long. Hatboy obviously copped it a bit worse, seeing as he got the death-penalty. Or maybe that's lenient.

He got thunder'd by Lee. It's not as lenient as it's leenient.

 

On 5/1/2019 at 11:47 AM, Mad-manakete said:

All part of the (humorously over-the-top) corrupt lawyer act I was going for. Loosely based off the "Black Rage Defense" used in this instance. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1993_Long_Island_Rail_Road_shooting#"Black_rage"_defense where the guilty party pretty much argued that slavery and other past wrongs against African Americans lead to him intricately planning a shooting where he murdered several people because of a spontaneous expression of his rage. You know. Because spontaneous expressions of rage lead to several weeks of planning.

Oh, well if it's that easy, then I can just go out and murder 10 people or something because "the guys at the forum were mean to me when I killed fifty people in videogames".

...on second thought, I think arguing that would only cause me to sink deeper, so let's not do that.

Naturally it didn't work and he is serving 315 years and six months to life imprisonment. Effectually, he comes up for parole in 2309. Provided someone finds a way to extend his life that long. Hatboy obviously copped it a bit worse, seeing as he got the death-penalty. Or maybe that's lenient.

Hatman got burned by Lee. It's not as lenient as it's leenient.

 

Update:

Spoiler

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Ah, so you have! Please, tell me he can be saved...

tN4k68u.pngWhat? Is he still alive?

vUN6DQJ.pngOur healers are tending to his wounds, but I'm afraid he's too far gone.

0zFk3fj.png Alas, poor Seamus. We barely knew him, but damn, that was one badass send-off he got.

vUN6DQJ.pngHe wishes to speak with you. Shall I grant him an audience, milord?

tN4k68u.pngYes, I'll go talk to him. Bring me to him, Eugen.

vUN6DQJ.pngYes, milord.

MnJl0uz.pngvNs6BvI.png

0zFk3fj.png Man, he got utterly carbonized... I'm shocked, and I was the one who made the edit! Although, to be fair, I could've made him look like a real burn victim instead of simply pouring ash all over him. That wouldn't have been pleasant in the slightest.

tN4k68u.pngOf course. We will guarantee the safety of those who surrender willingly, in accordance with the laws of Razelia. You have nothing to fear, General.

0zFk3fj.png Those who surrender willingly? Who are those? We killed everyone!

EqgwLzh.png

IfRBMws.png Oh... I understand...

OzzaR1A.pngAh... I see... You have my thanks... Lord Runan... Please... take this...

tN4k68u.pngWhat an elegant shield! But why?

OzzaR1A.pngPlease... save my homeland...

lBwOsKh.png

0zFk3fj.png Farewell, Seamus. You weren't the flashiest man, or the most important to the plot, but still, you did well.

k0EUqDi.png

tN4k68u.pngAnd yet this general begged me to save Canaan... Why would he ask that of us?

vUN6DQJ.pngThe Empire is likely not as stable as it seems, milord. King Bahanuk of Canaan spent twenty long years in his campaign to unite the nations of the Zoa Valley into the Empire. No doubt there is still much lingering bitterness over his warmongering. Not only that, but his decision to ally with the Cult of Gerxel has no dout weakened the Empire's stability further.

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0zFk3fj.png I smell a Gharnef.

vUN6DQJ.pngIt is likely only thanks to the hard work of the Emperor's gifted sons that the Empire has held together thus far.

tN4k68u.pngArless, Barker, and Julius... The Three Stars of Canaan. Father told me about them when I was little.

0zFk3fj.png I now smell Camuses.

vUN6DQJ.pngYour father knew them all well. Lord Gramud was sworn brothers with Crown Prince Arless, even during the war against the Empire. Each of them was the only one who could stand against the other on the battlefield. The Treaty of Nolzeria was only made possible through their efforts.

tN4k68u.pngBut then Mousa burned all of that to ash...

vUN6DQJ.pngIndeed. And not only the two of them, but also the thousands of Nolzerian citizens...

kSRPCpd.png

tN4k68u.pngAnd why would Mousa agree to massacre the people she had been chosen to protect?

vUN6DQJ.pngI'm afraid I do not know, milord. The Emperor believes that his beloved Prince Arless was backstabbed by Reeve, and our own King Badoum blamed the summoning of Mousa on the Cult. Now the conflict is fueled by mutual hatred. It's what everyone feared would happen.

tN4k68u.pngWhat everyone feared would happen... I wonder...

vUN6DQJ.pngWhat do you mean, Lord Runan?

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0zFk3fj.png It's not exactly a great mystery, is it?

WzWeFrL.png

Seamus gave us his +12 defense shield. Thank you, man. I'll make the most of it.

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uK3Mg7G.png

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tN4k68u.pngHuh? What's the matter, Eugen!

vUN6DQJ.pngNarcus has fled, milord!

0zFk3fj.png Again?

vUN6DQJ.pngForgive me, I should have kept a closer eye on him...

tN4k68u.pngThat's no big deal, is it? Narcus always said that he wanted to be like a falcon, free to soar the skies. You can't keep him caged up.

ElAZiKM.png

IfRBMws.png Hoo, boy. He must've done something bad to anger Eugen so much.

tN4k68u.pngYou seem quite incensed today, Eugen. Is something the matter?

vUN6DQJ.pngThe tihng is... Narcus broke into our treasure hold and made off with half of our war funds.

tN4k68u.pngHalf of our funds?!

IfRBMws.png Oh, no! All those... 300 pieces of gold!

vUN6DQJ.pngFear not, Lord Runan!

hPQm52L.png

hTMofYU.png Hahahah! I don't think that 300 gold was worth it, Narcus. You're so screwed...

tN4k68u.pngCalm yourself, Eugen! First, just focus on capturing him. I will decide his fate.

vUN6DQJ.pngIf you insist...

hTMofYU.png You can just hear the disappointment in his voice when Runan didn't agree with his plan to go full inquisition-mode on Narcus's butt.

LGcjJDF.png

Guess we'll be doing the customary check-in with the bad guys.

wiAehT0.png

Oh, it's you!

qaRBlgC.pngI beg of you, if you would only give us a little while longer, I promise we will pay in full!

wT5XUU4.png

0zFk3fj.png ...I don't think I need to say anything, do I?

IfRBMws.png But I still will! What is that? Why do you have a cross-shaped scar on your forehead? Why are you carrying around a riding crop? When did you decide it was a good idea to grow Waluigi's moustache? And the hair! If I couldn't see your face, with that slim build I might think you're a woman! That's one heck of an awful surprise to be had!

soiQK3r.pngSenay's autonomy is only acknowledged under the condition that you pay the Empire the taxes you were paying to Reeve!

qaRBlgC.pngI understand, but... Reeve never asked for so much! Prince Barker himself told us that the same amount would be sufficient, yet you make us pay almost triple that!

soiQK3r.png...What exactly are you implying?

qaRBlgC.pngO-Oh, no, nothing...

soiQK3r.pngYour pitiful city ought've been razed to the ground for having sided with Reeve, but Prince Barker showed you mercy. Surely you don't feel that Senay is being treated unfairly?

qaRBlgC.pngN-No! I'm sure this is all just an unfortunate misunderstanding! I'm sure that if you ask the prince...

soiQK3r.pngIf the prince were to become aware of this, I do not know if I could guarantee the well-being of the people of Senay... Think of your family, my good mayor.

0zFk3fj.png After what we saw of him with Seamus, I doubt Barker would really mind all that much. In fact, he'd probably turn against you for demanding that they give you more money so you can line your pockets. An empty threat if I've ever seen one, but unfortunately...

qaRBlgC.pngN-No... Have mercy...!

0zFk3fj.png ...the mayor doesn't have a spine.

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qaRBlgC.pngO-Of course! At once, Lord Pavlov!

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0zFk3fj.png Man, random latin as well? The only reason this guy's not a moustache-twirling villain is that, if he tried twirling it, he'd ruin the perfect "evil" balance that it has going on!

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0zFk3fj.png Another one? This one's like the Royal Historian of Wellt, but a lot flashier and with hair.

soiQK3r.pngWell, if it isn't Carnell! I had not heard that you were here.

7gjhTzs.pngUnfortunately, I derw the short straw and was assigned to the dull backwaters of Selba. If I did not come down to breathe some city air every once and(sic) a while, I'd go mad. You are quite fortunate, Pavlov. There seems to be much profit to be made here in Senay.

soiQK3r.pngIt's not as easy as it may appear. You cannot trust these dirty merchants. They claim to have no money, yet they still manage to employ a band of mercenaries to wander the streets doing nothing. Their riches remain hidden to me for now, but that will change soon enough.

7gjhTzs.pngAnd what will you do with all that newfoudn wealth?

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0zFk3fj.png Goodness gracious, not only is he an evil, ugly, sadistic, despicable son of a bitch, he's also not an idiot! His plan is solid! We better kill this asshole sooner than later...

7gjhTzs.pngSo you plan to become one of Gerxel's pawns as well, do you? That's rather unlike you, Pavlov.

soiQK3r.pngYou're one to talk, Carnell. You should hear all the damning rumors people spread about you. Your underlings are practically slaves with all that you put them through.. And capturing women and children for the Cult for who knows what purpose...

7gjhTzs.pngSurely you haven't bought into those stories? They're vicious lies, all of them.

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soiQK3r.pngYou and I have nothing to fear. Prince Barker is powerless against Gerxel. Soon, the Cult will have control over all of Lieberia.

7gjhTzs.pngYou are no fool, Pavlov. In that case, I shall be direct.

xQunKTk.png You know, I actually like the dynamic these two have. Don't get me wrong, they're both horribly unlikeable, but it's rare to see two throwaways who just happen to be friends and are having a casual conversation about how they're both evil and they love it. It's pretty good, it gives them both more character than the usual "guy who stands on the seize point".

7gjhTzs.pngI have a little favor to ask of you.

soiQK3r.pngA favor, you say? Well, I certainly cannot refuse a request from an old friend.

7gjhTzs.pngI would like you to keep a certain Salian rebel imprisoned for me. We captured her just this last week, but it's too risky for me to keep her in Selba. Would you kindly keep her here for the time being, Pavlov?

soiQK3r.pngA Salian rebel, you say? One of Lionheart's dogs, I presume?

0zFk3fj.png Richard? Nah, can't be, he's all the way in Mahl... Lionheart's an entirely different person. We should be meeting him soon-ish.

soiQK3r.pngWhy not save yourself the trouble and simply execute her?

7gjhTzs.pngExecute her?! Ridiculous! I'd like to keep my head on my shoulders.

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xQunKTk.png Man, he may be an asshole, but you've got to give it to him, he's an entertaining asshole. No "Yes, Sir!"s or "Understood, milord!"s with this one.

7gjhTzs.pngYou don't understand, Pavlov... You have no idea how vicious Lionheart can be...

soiQK3r.pngIf you say so, Carnell. Very well, leave the girl to me.

0zFk3fj.png As for Carnell... I can't say I understand his plan. If he kills the rebel, Lionheart will go berserk on him, so... he just makes her disappear in a different way? How is that going to change the outcome, exactly? Is he going to hide under his bed and, when Lionheart comes for him, scream "wait, I don't have her! Pavlov of Senay has her! Go get him!"?

gDqrCZ0.png

soiQK3r.pngAnd if she chooses to remain silent... heh heh heh...!

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You know, as much as I like how well-written he is, I still look forward to the moment I can stab him repeatedly. And we haven't seen anything yet...

lfwGsxN.png56Bj03t.png

She looks tiny. Let me guess, Kaga: 15 years old?

cA5DAqQ.png

xQunKTk.png Pictured: The reason fanslations aren't always such a bad thing.

soiQK3r.pngI'll teach you to defy me, woman! Take that! And that! And that!

RyOwF3h.png

0zFk3fj.png Okay, so, two questions. First, why does Pavlov need his generic underling to tell him that the prisoner is knocked out? Does he not have eyes? And second... Eritz? Did they really recolor Eritz? That's almost as bad as Morgan being a recolor of the one memorable earlygame boss in FE6. Almost. Except... wait, it's not exactly Eritz, is he? He's got Eritz's head, but his body's different. And in the Tear Ring Saga dev blog (yes, that's a thing), the artwork for Eritz actually matches this portrait rather than the one he had. Ugh... my head's spinning. Where were we again?

soiQK3r.pngHaah, haah... Then throw more water on her, you dolt! I'm not done with her yet!

YuCbALi.pngMilord, if we continue any further, the prisoner will likely die. I would suggest stopping for today.

soiQK3r.pngPhew... Very well. Throw her into the dungeon, and report to me when she regains conciousness. Also, have a stake and firewood prepared in the city square.

YuCbALi.pngIs she to be... executed, milord?

xNv2HAU.png

0zFk3fj.png Oh, yeah, and as if he wasn't unapologetically bad enough already, he's going to have her killed anyway, which is exactly what Carnell wanted to avoid. What a good friend, this guy. Is there any part of him that isn't irredeemably evil?

YuCbALi.png......

YuCbALi.pngHalt! Who goes there?!

TgiEDow.png

xQunKTk.png Ah, what a breath of fresh air! You look recruitable.

YuCbALi.pngYou fool! This is Count Pavlov's private chambers! Leave at once!

soiQK3r.pngHold, Black Knight. I have a task for you.

twhnfrc.pngYes, milord?

soiQK3r.pngTake this prisoner to the dungeon. Hand her over to the prison guards, and they will take care of the rest.

twhnfrc.pngSure, that's simple enough. Leave it to me.

twhnfrc.png...Which way is the dungeon?

xQunKTk.png Mintz is a lovable bastard. You'll see why later, in what's one of my favourite scenes in the entire game.

q687BWM.png

0zFk3fj.png But first, dungeon.

twhnfrc.pngFinally awake, huh? How are you feeling?

i2FbJok.pngAh...!

twhnfrc.pngWhat was going on before? Why was Pavlov beating up a young lady like you?

i2FbJok.pngYou don't know anything...?

twhnfrc.pngWhat's that supposed to mean?

i2FbJok.pngN-Nothing... I'm exhausted... I want to rest a while longer...

brqKyv6.pngqekcqrj.png

0zFk3fj.png The screen fades to black, and then it cuts back to the exact same thing.

twhnfrc.pngHave a nice nap? Seems like the medicine helped a bit. Your fever's gone, at least.

i2FbJok.pngYou... You stayed here in the dungeon with me...? You were by my side the whole time?

twhnfrc.pngWell, I wasn't so much as(sic) by your side as letting you sleep on my lap...

i2FbJok.pngOh, goodness...!

cWV4VSn.png

hTMofYU.png Hahahahahah! What a huge dork.

i2FbJok.pngOh, no, that's not what I was thinking... T-Thank you, Sir, um...

twhnfrc.pngI'm Mintz. I'm from Canaan. What's your name?

i2FbJok.pngIt's Leonie... I'm from Selba, in Salia.

twhnfrc.png"Leonie", eh? How pretty! I've always liked Salian names.

0zFk3fj.png In the old transition she was called "Rennie". I think I like the new one better.

twhnfrc.pngWell, Miss Leonie, I don't think a cell like this is befitting for a young lady like yourself. I'm gonna go have a chat with my superior, and then I'll come get you out. Just stay here and keep your head down for a little while longer, got it?

77taPfp.png

Yes, please do go talk with your superior. It's a hilarious sequence.

dfpJTZS.pngRu01u3Z.png

Hmm... Senay Guard, eh? Must be the mercenaries Pavlov mentioned.

0P2vImo.pngrbOWQ2T.png

Gee, I wonder if any of those mercenaries will be recruitable.

hYLjMOm.pngphV5EgW.png

Ah, I'm sure old Dolph will be glad to see us.

ifoW4Kv.pngodPHWjA.png

We arrive, and Runan goes inside the town hall.

lxgQsfD.png

qaRBlgC.pngAs I have said multiple times, the Empire has allowed Senay to remain autonomous only under the condition that we remain neutral. Therefore, we absolutely cannot allow enemies of the Empire into the city.

vUN6DQJ.pngYou pick sides, yet you would still call yourselves neutral? Imperial forces are assembling in the north, and they will soon descend upon us. Their attack will inevitably take them through Senay territory if unopposed.

qaRBlgC.pngThis war has nothing to do with us. Getting involved will only cause us trouble. Now please, withdraw your troops at once, or we will be forced to defend ourselves.

dmjtHNP.png

hTMofYU.png Eugen steals yet another scene. Hahahah!

tN4k68u.pngEnough, Eugen! Sir Mayor, I understand your predicament. We will withdraw from Senay for now.

 

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NyiFoJl.pngAg6UVE1.pngLS4j1fz.png

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R0OyUMS.png

Next up, a random house.

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0zFk3fj.png Oh, look, sexism.

4yIU3RN.png

xQunKTk.png And a strong, independent woman to go with it!

orfi8jp.pngBah, our mayor's such a fool... Why'd he waste money on a lass like you instead of hiring a big, burly man? Sorry, lady, but you just don't look cut out for the job. Know what I mean?

POm7AWK.png

orfi8jp.pngNow, you're a prime specimen! A warriro who's braved many battles! You're totally different from the little lady.

nFVZz2V.pngYou think so? I'll have you know that Lady Sharon here could whoop me ten times over without breaking a sweat. So why don't you just shut your mouth, you old crone?

orfi8jp.pngEep!

xQunKTk.png Hell yeah, you showed her, Billford! Except you're a knight and unless she uses an estoc or an armorslayer, you'd have her beat before she could even get you down to half your health bar. But still, good effort!

l9X3N1M.pngBillford, stop it. There's no use sinking to her level.

nFVZz2V.pngYes, Lady Sharon! My apologies!

l9X3N1M.pngThat said... We sure have fallen low, haven't we, Billford? Our dream of returning to our posts as knights of Barge seems further every day...

6gV2jIX.png

l9X3N1M.pngI didn't mean it like that, Billford. I'm fine with being a mercenary. I was just thinking about the future, and whether we'll ever return home. Or if Raffin will ever return home...

xQunKTk.png Can you spell "hint, hint"?

l9X3N1M.pngAnyway, you needn't worry about me so excessively, Billford.

nFVZz2V.pngAs you command, milady! I am always at your service.

0zFk3fj.png One thing's clear: white armor was a good choice for this man.

l9X3N1M.pngLet's head out. It's almost time for our shift.

nFVZz2V.pngYes, milady!

fFLzqwn.png

0zFk3fj.png I suppose this is as good a time as any to mention the fact that Sharon here was my first casualty in my last run of this game. With any luck the story won't repeat itself.

J2e0c2Q.png

orfi8jp.pngFrom what I overheard, they seem to be knights who lost their country to the Empire. Why? Got your sights set on that girl?

XaQD3CQ.pngNah. She ain't bad, but she'd be way too much for me to handle. I'm into the more gentle gals.

orfi8jp.pngHah, when you say it like that, it sounds like you're looking for a lover! You scoundrel, you.

XaQD3CQ.pngThat's rich, comin' from you! Heh heh.

osYHNyT.png

orfi8jp.pngSure thing. I'll give you the signal.

0zFk3fj.png You thought that sounded sketchy? You haven't seen anything. This chapter features one of the most infamous moments of this game, and these two are its protagonists.

JSjV386.png

But that is not relevant at the moment. For now, Billford and Sharon exit the pub.

Tg8Sxr7.png

Ah, finally, here it is! One of my personal favourite scenes of the game!

ki5pUK7.pngqDOdisj.png

twhnfrc.pngYeah, it was a tough choice between you and the slave camps in Zoa, but I figured the army would be better for sightseeing.

gAbVkav.pngHa! Right you are. I can't offer quite as luxurious accommodations as the camps, but I do hope they'll suffice for you.

xQunKTk.png Ah, yes, the Zoa camps are better than 5 star hotels. They give free massages! With a whip, but still, it's the intention that counts!

gAbVkav.pngI must say, we've got it pretty good. I haven't seen or heard from any of those damned Gerxel priests for weeks. Right now, we of the 15th Corps are assigned to prevent the enemy from advancing through these grasslands. So long as they don't get too close, we won't even have to fight. Enjoy your break while it lasts.

twhnfrc.pngWhat if Fort Senay needs reinforcements, and Pavlov calls for you?

BY1v7K4.png

twhnfrc.pngHahaha! Oh, poor Pavlov. Well, that's a load off my mind.

xQunKTk.png This applies to the gameplay side of things, too. Ernst never goes to help Pavlov. And when you see what his stats look like, you'll be profoundly grateful for that.

twhnfrc.pngOh, one more thing, General. If I were to suddenly disappear, what would you do?

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hTMofYU.png Bahahahahah... oh, these two. I love 'em.

gAbVkav.pngTo be honest, I'm curious why you haven't already disappeared. It's not like you have family to worry about.

twhnfrc.pngWell, wouldn't it be trouble for you?

gAbVkav.pngWhat are you talking about? I'm not going to be court-martialed just because a known troublemaker deserted.

twhnfrc.pngHaha, you've got a point. You're a good man, General. Take care of yourself.

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0zFk3fj.png Actually, I don't believe you ever do have to do that.

But that's something we'll have to confirm next time! Please do your best to fare well. When the time comes, you'll receive a notification, I hope. Nothing else, that's been the update. I'll see you in the next!

Death count: --

Reset count: 0

 

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Dang it! Just missed it!

Anyway, long story short, I'll be taking a computer/electronic fast over the next few days due to personal reasons that need not be elaborated here. The only two exceptions will be for getting college stuff done and commenting on this Lets Play.

On 1/2/2019 at 5:30 PM, Interdimensional Observer said:

Yes. And you actually can get one on your side. She can join earlier if you do something that on paper not having played the game sounds counterintuitive, or you can get her later, which should make her I would think a little less good.

Her bases aren't the prettiest, nor her growths. But she can from the beginning Warp to any traversable space and attack in the same turn, that being her only but incredible skill. She is also the lone PC who can use Dark Magic (in addition to the Anima trio for the sake of practicality).

Huh, interesting. Wonder what you mean by it sounding "counterintuitive" on paper.

Also, Kaga did "only one character wields dark magic" first.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Honestly, I don't know. It's a decent game, I suppose, but already I'm having difficulties finding stuff to do. The story's mindlessly easy and feels like little more than a grind for free orbs, while the PvP modes feel like a gamble (roll the dice and see if you'll get an opponent whose units don't vastly outmatch your own!). I wasn't expecting anything as good as a mainline FE, but this is a tad worse than what I was hoping for.

It's been over a year since I last played Heroes, but I do remember that the story chapters started out easy, but you soon unlock harder difficulties for them. My best unit was Lukas, as he had the movement of an infantry unit but the defense and attack of a tank. Sadly, the game got to big for my phone, and I eventually had to delete it.

I don't know how much stuff they added since I last played, and I don't see much of a reason to go back to it as Blustone scratched the itch it left behind.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hey, it's your old profile picture!

Yep! Makos face is perfect for showing annoyed disapproval.

I seem to alternate between "characters looking annoyed" and "random pictures I have saved to my computer for some reason" for my avatar picture. I chose my current one after finding out that Blustone was getting a (technical) sequel, and I just love this awesome artwork.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Tell me how you like the new one.

A slight bit better, although I still passed by it a few times.

Maybe it's not so much the color, but the title size? I don't want to sound like a Complaining Cassie here (if that's even a thing).

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Amazing.

I still think that season three, where Sonic and Co. went into space, would actually make for a good Sonic game. Exploring different planets would allow them to get creative and diverse with the level design, and it would also allow them to create a longer game without having to stretch playtime artificially.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Batman with a fish. Okay, I won't ask.

That is a pretty accurate description. Only other thing worth bringing up is that he is one of three characters you have to unlock.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Myself, I enjoy the memes, the fights and the occasional character discussions and that's about it. It's a comfy position to be in.

Lucky duck. The fights, memes, and videogames are pretty awesome.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

If he's not german, he doesn't count.

Well, you could get creative with the avatar, but that's the closest you're going to get.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Gaiden's sounds horrible, to be frank.

Eh. I don't mind it too much, but it's really because the rules apply to the enemy as much as they do the player. Magic hurts no matter who's on the receiving end, and while it is more costly for the player to summon cannon fodder, it's just as unlimited. That, and there are some tricks and tactics to get around cantors.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah, you got the reference!

Monkey Island is an awesome game. Lucasarts earned their reputation for being masters of humor.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

C'mon, you were supposed to politely say "no, Ruben, you say plenty of reassuring things"!

"But Ruben, how many times have things not gone as you predicted, but for the better?"

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Marvelous. Absolutely delightful.

If this ends up becoming a larger meme, I'm claiming credit for it.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

I can't say if that's a good idea or not. You tell me, when you do it.

I've tried the demo for it. It's odd that the face buttons control the camera, especially when the original game worked fine with a fixed one, but at least nothing is pressure sensitive this time around. Means that you can't slit the throat of a guard you meant to interrogate by accident anymore (unless you have serious butter fingers).

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Damnit! You missed the best paaaaaarts~!

Don't worry. I remember exactly where I left off. It shouldn't take a whole lot of time to complete it (hopefully).

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hahahah... if the time comes! But it will, surely... right?

Related image

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

I'm pretty sure he never was a general.

He was a Colonel. But this is the realm of fiction, is it not?

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Who is that, and why does he look like he belongs in a romantic Visual Novel rather than in FE?

Oh, that's right, modern FE is a romantic VN!

I jest, I jest, don't kill me.

You dare say that about my second favorite character from Awakening!

...Despite the fact the I joke that Lucina X Laurent is the only thing I ship, entirely due to how I've exploited their fast support growth and how they're the only two characters I can reliably manage to get to together in every single playthrough of the game I've done.

Really, though, I find the complaint that Awakening is "shipping emblem" to not be as prevalent as people make it out to be. Although To be fair, S-supports are all over the place in terms of quality, and the fact that how "believable" they are will inherently range from person to person doesn't help. Not to mention how those aspects affected Fates development...

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Considering how much of a terrible person he is in general, and the fact that there are plenty of great female units, I'm pretty sure it was just done to make the player hate Richard even more. As for Zieg's thing, it looked like he was just ignorant and genuinely curious.

I see.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Or an army.

That too.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hah. That was funny.

Glad to hear it got a laugh.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

You could've made one yourself!

Except that would have been a complicated process of starting the game, taking pictures on my phone, getting lucky with two quotse, uploading them somewhere and then creating the meme, all for a single joke.

Especially when I've seen the picture before somewhere.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Nah, sexism is all right if it comes from a woman. It's the truth! The TV said so! The TV would never lie to me, right?

...I would joke about that, except that feminism just flips the issue instead of solving it. That, and the damage they've done to the positive aspects of masculinity is concerning, and this is coming from a guy that isn't a fan of such things.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

"Maybe"?!

I mean, Codha was spared. Maybe this guy won't turn out to be a bad guy and is instead just an ally that is also an @$$hole

In matters where one could potentially be wrong, always leave a way out.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

And then there's Richard, who knows about a tenth of it. The tenth that involves himself.

But does Richard truly know thyself?

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Poor Richard. One thing he has, and you go and ruin it.

Which just means that if he strived to work towards removind the "d*ck" part of him, he could be quite a reasonable fellow.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Preferably to recruit women who can fight. That's actually an interesting point: if you think back, other than Zieg and the Verje bunch, he only showed up when Runan was recruiting females. Who else but Eugen?

Please tell me that a "guy looks like a girl" character is in this game, and that Eugen attempts to salvage something golden from his mistake.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Runan's awesome. Holmes has nothing on him. That's my humble opinion.

A humble opinion I agree with.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hey, it's a lot easier to feign something when you really are that something, amirite?

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On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Give it time...

This just excites me further...

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

In the old translation he was called Barca, which is spanish for "boat". I'd take Barker over that any day, Barker actually sounds like a pretty badass name.

Captian Barker! That just sounds like something out of an 80s cartoon and I love it.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah, I'm fond of it also.

I just realized the ambiguousness of the word "that" in the sentence.

Apparently, I have a lot of moments of retroactive cleverness.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

It would've been a riot, to be sure.

Eugen and Runan walking along in the desert. Runan asks the question, to which Eugen deadpannly responds. The camera zoom out, revealing they've separated from the group, and Runan animatedly panics...

I really do want to see that animated now.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

6qgF5s1.pngBckn0mn.png

Then there's this. I'll talk more about this later.

Oooh! A chameleon is in this game.

Certainly explains how he disguised himself as Codha earlier. Although I'm questioning if I want to know the details of how now...

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hey! Norton! Don't just throw it on the ground! I know they do that all the time in movies and games, but that doesn't mean you should follow their example! If a fictional character jumped off a bridge, would you follow them? No, right? Then think of that house's owner, who's going to have to pick up the glass shards!

At the very least, grab the 100% shards, grab a big stick, shapren it into a spear, and use a dirty cloth, another piece of glass, and the melee skill to make a makeshift spear!

Neo Scavanger joke

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

DkcN0WA.png

...okay, maybe I won't.

Guess that's one way to look at the positive side of things.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Meriel's idle animation consists of her tapping her foot while grabbing her arm. It's not as dumb as Maruj's animations, anyway.

Huh. Interesting to hear she even has an idle animation.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

d9TaHRT.pngfhfPTkR.pngwoidLZl.png

I can't tell if she's shooting that out of her eyes, her throat, or her heart.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

TgX6UxQ.png

The flier animations in this game are awesome. Sasha idles up in the sky...

Ztk8SLr.pngqb9gisv.png3ttMdGE.png

Then she comes down and strikes her pray!

They may not be goofy, but this is more than a satisfactory replacement.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh, of course, I'd forgotten. The only one who can do things right is the one who refuses to kill.

Perhaps she's taking after superheroes with no killing rules, and is thus getting creative with how to incapacitate her foes.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

seWyH67.pngfNydGMx.png

...a tiny, cartoonish star hovers above the enemy's head and the guy magically takes damage. Beautiful.

That is hilariously pathetic.

In a good way. Let the enemy die an embarrassing death!

Also, does this mean Meriel is a fan of the "magic girl" genre or whatever it's called? And oh my gosh I just realized that Meriel is one letter off from Miriel.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

KmvcUMl.png

And now he goes down. Sasha, why are you trying to cut your Pegasus's wing?

I can see why Pegasus riders usually wield lances now.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

V8GHAnw.png

I somehow managed to find this game's counterpart to GBAFE's flashbangs. Great job, me. Expect to see these shots frequently in the updates to come.

In-universe, I'm blaming the smoke from the fire spell.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Look at that! 2 less attack than Lee with basic tomes. If she can get that close to the man himself, I think I'd better not check how she fares against Meriel. I don't want my Mage to fall into a deep depression yet.

Interesting how that turned out.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

LtW7ssR.pngCFiAl7o.png

And we begin working on the asshole with the hammer!

Huh, guess they didn't keep the "weapon affects the sprite" thing from the SNES games.

Can't blame them, though. Given how many unique weapons there are in this game.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

YZZLN8c.png

These are the Sonnenblume Dagon was talking about. They're rather vicious. Sure, terribad stats, but see that skill? That's the Warp skill. It works just as you'd expect it to: that 3 move really means unlimited move. They can go anywhere they please, any time they want. Best ensure noone can get killed by the two of them.

So these are the "witches" that @Interdimensional Observer brought up. Are they "balanced" by the the all-over-the-place AI Gaiden/Echoes witches had (which at the very least had a good story reason for why that was so) or are they capable of more tactical decisions?

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hah! Norton's the real tank here! And his horse, of course.

I never expected the day when I would hear of something out-tanking a tank.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ywmyatb.png

And what do you know? They're even wearing similar attire to Echoes witches.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

XVRx0pA.pngfsBloj4.png

Flashbangs, again? How do I do it?

Other in-universe explanation: Meriel knows that you're taking screenshots of her and doesn't like it.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Ah, thank goodness, he dodged. Dodges without animations on are represented by the map sprite moving one pixel backwards and the dodging sound effect playing. It's hard to convey with screenshots, of course.

...I'm trying to remember whether or not any of the Fire Emblem games do that.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

JC2jxre.pngWjszm0z.png

Well, it looks freaky thus far, but it doesn't seem like such a big deal...

oBhBWj6.png

ACK!

14XxCbZ.pngeWYzORn.png

Nosferatu is a giant snake!?!?

That's... That is...

AWESOME!!!

Course, I could complain that the snake just shoots something at the foe rather than bite them, but I can see the trauma that can put into players of seeing their favorite character die a hideous death of being swallowed alive.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Cy4lH0H.png

Raquel doesn't care that she's got a giant snake all over her. She just sidesteps the shiny particles and that's all she needs to do.

I kinda question how you're supposed to doge being wrapped around by a giant snake, but I'm not complaining.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

C'mon, you idiot! The time to miss is NOW! NOOOOO! DON'T NAIL BOTH SHOTS! YOU'VE BEEN MISSING ALL THE CHAPTER, AND NOW IS WHEN YOU DECIDE IT'S A GOOD IDEA TO BECOME A PROFESSIONAL MARKSMAN!?

...fuck my life. First blood.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh, I can't look... they're going to rip her apart!

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

GAAAAAAH I CAN HEAR THE SOUNDS OF THE ARROWS PIERCING HER DELICATE BODY! NOOOO! HOW COULD I BE SO DUMB!?

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

bq3NhuL.png

...

...I... w... what?

What happened?! Rewind, rewind...

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

C'mon, you were supposed to politely say "no, Ruben, you say plenty of reassuring things"!

"But Ruben, how many times have things not gone as you predicted, but for the better?"

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

YIGOlAt.pngPoor guy... he never was the same since he got struck by lightning.

No joke, one of my best friends was electrocuted once as a kid, and it really did drastically alter his personality.

With that said, he's one of the most eccentric people I know, and I take everything he says with a grain of salt.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hah! What did Raiden say when he shot lightning, again...

checking

Ergh... AIAIAHAOAOAOHAAIAAOHA?

To this day, people still wonder what Raiden says.

All that's missing is for Superlee to do the same move.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Narcus, aside from finding the secret shop key, has very thiefy stats. However, he doesn't have Steal, instead trading it off for Imitate. He's basically Xane, except instead of copying the exact stats of the unit, he gets some increases to his own bases, which in some cases makes him better than the unit he's copying, but more often than not he'll be worse off. Not my favourite, but oh well. He has another drawback, but that's not relevant right now.

Sounds both useful and useless. Copying stats seems more straightforward, although copying bases wouldn't be so bad in a game like gaiden/echoes.

Curious as to what this other drawback is.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

quwo451.pngRetreat is for the weak. Those who refuse to march will be executed for insubordination.

He'd better be eating those words!

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

hTMofYU.png ...holy shit. Way to go, Seamus. You're a badass.

He is, although I get the feeling he'll die soon.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

AzIyLo6.png

JESUS CHRIST ON A BIKE, HE GOT BURNED TO A CRISP!

Yep. At least he died as a bad@$$

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

nNcp9rI.png

That... that doesn't look healable.

Doesn't quite look like a skeleton, but at the same time, you might actually get in trouble with a mod if you showed realistic burns.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

pemEuO6.png

I've seen boss changes in the middle of battles before, but never when my units are in his range! Dang, 8 crit... they can take it thanks to the support, but...

I swear, if this bastard warps away at the last second...

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

jDEjqhb.png

Round of healing for everyone! What's up with that background? Why does it look like a photograph from a Medieval movie set?

Maybe they're a DnD party or a group of point-and-click adventurers? Or maybe this worlds version of the Monty Pythons are filming the Holy Grail of this universe?

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Stjyhgb.png

And now he has a shield of sparkles! Isn't that cool?

It's like Lee has invincibililee from a platformer power-up.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Mgf9NcJ.pnglEAy2vy.png

I love that animation. So ridiculous...

All that's missing is for Lee to awesomelee do this:

Image result for the last jedi skywalker gif

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

8MLbbot.pngzjNayzv.png

A mess, indeed.

Giving credit where credit is due, he ain't a coward.

Which just means that for us, he shall trouble us no longer.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

qklAcct.pnguDH9QEh.png

Wait, you actually have a secret shop in your house? With an Anna copycat included?

Y'know? As much as we've been joking that Kaga did things first, he really wasn't trying very hard to avoid copyright rules at points.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hold on a moment, how does this work? Do you need that key to open the room? Has she been locked up in your basement for 10 years? That would explain why the place looks so dank.

Considering that Pre-Awakening Anna decided to hide her shops in the oddest of locations, an old mans basement isn't too far-fetched.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

PnQhpBt.png

I should probably mention that this guy goes "HOLEH ARTICHOEKHS! YA FOUND THE KI!" every time I enter his house. Joy.

Maybe it's some kind of act that the old man plays for customers, and he and Anna are business partners. Heck, maybe in times of peace, it's an attraction for kids, where a key is hidden somewhere in the desert, they easily find it, he shouts the phrase, and Anna sells stuffed animals instead of weapons.

Something to think about.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

That's all, folks! Glad I could have you here today. Next time, we see if we can recover some of Seamus's ashes. Farewell until then. Better than he did. Goodbye, and I'll see you next time!

And since you posted right when I got online, I shall risk double-posting!

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On 1/5/2019 at 12:13 AM, Franp3 said:

Yadda yadda more than magic my friend

 

Worthashot counter is at 6 if anyone gives a shit.

Considering how irrelevant Zweihardt is I think he's come around on magic.

Also I'm surprised that you kept at it.

On 1/5/2019 at 10:47 AM, Mad-manakete said:

All part of the (humorously over-the-top) corrupt lawyer act I was going for. Loosely based off the "Black Rage Defense" used in this instance. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1993_Long_Island_Rail_Road_shooting#"Black_rage"_defense where the guilty party pretty much argued that slavery and other past wrongs against African Americans lead to him intricately planning a shooting where he murdered several people because of a spontaneous expression of his rage. You know. Because spontaneous expressions of rage lead to several weeks of planning. Naturally it didn't work and he is serving 315 years and six months to life imprisonment. Effectually, he comes up for parole in 2309. Provided someone finds a way to extend his life that long. Hatboy obviously copped it a bit worse, seeing as he got the death-penalty. Or maybe that's lenient.

Certainly was resolved faster.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You may not, but someone may, and that's enough for me. It's green because green's the best color, shut up it is.

Don't shut up, it's Green.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Sure felt that way to me!

Did you get unlucky enough to get 10 Saizos?

I mean, the Gacha giveth.... sometimes and the Gacha taketh all the bleeding time.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Honestly, it needs less PvP and more PvE that doesn't make me want to cry out of pity for the enemy.

Clearly you hadn't gotten round to the Lunatic Chain Challenges.

That'll make you cry with a smaller roster.

Would like to have actually seen a town like mode, Aether raids isn't quite it after all.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hey, keep in mind that's just my interpretation of Marth standing unarmed in front of a dropped sword (which couldn't be Lorenz's because he was a General with a javelin). It's not the ultimate truth.

Yeah, see I didn't think of it like that. I did think he had that sword with him.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

He found Wrys. Wrys is always there when you'd be very glad to take him with you.

Wrys wandering the world this whole time, only to hear about Marth moving out to Macedon and barely finding them in 3x.

That sounds like a neat story.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hmmmm...

K93Cp8p.png

Legit.

I decided I had to take a swing at it now:

SDA.png

(On closer inspection, that sword is massive compared to her and the pegasus.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Dude, don't jinx it! I don't want that to happen to her!

I mean, if they need rocket launchers to take her out she's grand, right?

Right?

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I can't say I get the joke here.

I guess you forgot Aladdin's ending.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Keep in mind I'm spanish. It's already difficult enough to get a hang of all the neutral English shenanigans!

I mean, explain Alejandro.

I think then we'll explain Naoise or Niamh. Or Saorise.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

What kind of security could a cross-eyed old fart provide?

I mean, he could secretly be a powerful mage. I mean, Not Anna's probably rich enough to hire a powerful guard.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

MnJl0uz.pngvNs6BvI.png

0zFk3fj.png Man, he got utterly carbonized... I'm shocked, and I was the one who made the edit! Although, to be fair, I could've made him look like a real burn victim instead of simply pouring ash all over him. That wouldn't have been pleasant in the slightest.

You could have made him look like Skeletor that way, for the best to avoid it.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

tN4k68u.pngOf course. We will guarantee the safety of those who surrender willingly, in accordance with the laws of Razelia. You have nothing to fear, General.

0zFk3fj.png Those who surrender willingly? Who are those? We killed everyone!

EqgwLzh.png

Man, what a killer personality.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

69ju4He.png

0zFk3fj.png I smell a Gharnef.

I smell a Sonya.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

vUN6DQJ.pngYour father knew them all well. Lord Gramud was sworn brothers with Crown Prince Arless, even during the war against the Empire. Each of them was the only one who could stand against the other on the battlefield. The Treaty of Nolzeria was only made possible through their efforts.

tN4k68u.pngBut then Mousa burned all of that to ash...

vUN6DQJ.pngIndeed. And not only the two of them, but also the thousands of Nolzerian citizens...

Well then, that's an awkward situation, seeing your peace literally burn down alongside thousands of lives. And yourself.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

S0ptobg.pngycKEm5U.png

I mean, he would certainly have insulted them.

I don't know if that would have worked, but who knows?

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

qfDCxk6.pngfpdrWdo.png7IHmNJQ.pngeB6ibkG.pngIXBhv5d.png60HQpuN.png

I mean, they both had to be told to stop jeopardising everything. It's not like it was all one sided-

vUN6DQJ.png"He's still a little shit."

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

CLR8R24.png

Or roast them.

Possibly roast them.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

tN4k68u.pngYou seem quite incensed today, Eugen. Is something the matter?

vUN6DQJ.pngThe tihng is... Narcus broke into our treasure hold and made off with half of our war funds.

"First that silly medallion dares insult you and then the man I trusted robbed us!"

Eugen Fuck-ups: 2 (Even if this one didn't backfire as hard because of your indulgences at the secret shop)

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

hPQm52L.png

hTMofYU.png Hahahah! I don't think that 300 gold was worth it, Narcus. You're so screwed...

I mean, I knew this was coming, 

Honestly though, execution's a bit uncreative though, he could do crueller things.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

wiAehT0.png

Oh, it's you!

qaRBlgC.pngI beg of you, if you would only give us a little while longer, I promise we will pay in full!

He looks like someone chose to make Dolph older and then stretch them out.

I mean, it does make sense that Macellan looks like that in his waning years.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

wT5XUU4.png

0zFk3fj.png ...I don't think I need to say anything, do I?

IfRBMws.png But I still will! What is that? Why do you have a cross-shaped scar on your forehead? Why are you carrying around a riding crop? When did you decide it was a good idea to grow Waluigi's moustache? And the hair! If I couldn't see your face, with that slim build I might think you're a woman! That's one heck of an awful surprise to be had!

Well, he must stress himself out all the time to have that furrowed a brow (or he was branded at one point. That could be interesting considering how he acts towards the cult), the crop is quite clear later on and I will say Pavlov's conditioner must be impressive.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

S177hV3.png

0zFk3fj.png Goodness gracious, not only is he an evil, ugly, sadistic, despicable son of a bitch, he's also not an idiot! His plan is solid! We better kill this asshole sooner than later...

See?

Maybe they got to him once and he swore never again.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png As for Carnell... I can't say I understand his plan. If he kills the rebel, Lionheart will go berserk on him, so... he just makes her disappear in a different way? How is that going to change the outcome, exactly? Is he going to hide under his bed and, when Lionheart comes for him, scream "wait, I don't have her! Pavlov of Senay has her! Go get him!"?

Well, maybe he assumes they'll leave when he says that?

I mean, he is an utter asshole.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

cA5DAqQ.png

xQunKTk.png Pictured: The reason fanslations aren't always such a bad thing.

Official translations can swear.

Once or twice.

Also, no Pavlov that's not how you condition someone. I swear, these namesakes are less and less fitting each time.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

RyOwF3h.png

0zFk3fj.png Okay, so, two questions. First, why does Pavlov need his generic underling to tell him that the prisoner is knocked out? Does he not have eyes? And second... Eritz? Did they really recolor Eritz? That's almost as bad as Morgan being a recolor of the one memorable earlygame boss in FE6. Almost. Except... wait, it's not exactly Eritz, is he? He's got Eritz's head, but his body's different. And in the Tear Ring Saga dev blog (yes, that's a thing), the artwork for Eritz actually matches this portrait rather than the one he had. Ugh... my head's spinning. Where were we again?

Well, he needed someone to tell him because he's really into his whipping (I could see him playing this in the background if that technology existed.)

I mean, I can't really comment on the recolour. Hell, other titles in FE have been even less capable of making changes (See Awakening's paralogue bosses?)

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

xNv2HAU.png

0zFk3fj.png Oh, yeah, and as if he wasn't unapologetically bad enough already, he's going to have her killed anyway, which is exactly what Carnell wanted to avoid. What a good friend, this guy. Is there any part of him that isn't irredeemably evil?

Course, Carnell should have seen it coming from the guy who carries a whip around for the sake of it.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

i2FbJok.pngYou... You stayed here in the dungeon with me...? You were by my side the whole time?

twhnfrc.pngWell, I wasn't so much as(sic) by your side as letting you sleep on my lap...

i2FbJok.pngOh, goodness...!

Mintz, the knight with a black mark on his record for inappropriate behaviour.

Is that why he got sent to the camp?

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

cWV4VSn.png

hTMofYU.png Hahahahahah! What a huge dork.

I mean, I'd like that video of Xander I linked in the last LP, but I don't think I need to.

He says it for me. What a twit.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

twhnfrc.png"Leonie", eh? How pretty! I've always liked Salian names.

0zFk3fj.png In the old transition she was called "Rennie". I think I like the new one better.

I mean, it was a good call considering Rennie's an antacid.

I don't think dropping a Leonie has the same strange connotations.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

e6cdbis.pngj2BUc6e.png

I mean, I have to assume that he's just being himself for this.

Was this match just after the Burn Incursion?

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

nFVZz2V.pngYou think so? I'll have you know that Lady Sharon here could whoop me ten times over without breaking a sweat. So why don't you just shut your mouth, you old crone?

orfi8jp.pngEep!

xQunKTk.png Hell yeah, you showed her, Billford! Except you're a knight and unless she uses an estoc or an armorslayer, you'd have her beat before she could even get you down to half your health bar. But still, good effort!

What were their bases?

We'll see before long. I mean, would you trust Barth to beat Allen for instance?

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

twhnfrc.pngYeah, it was a tough choice between you and the slave camps in Zoa, but I figured the army would be better for sightseeing.

gAbVkav.pngHa! Right you are. I can't offer quite as luxurious accommodations as the camps, but I do hope they'll suffice for you.

Ah, so the camps must have great ratings on the rooms but room service must be an utter pain and the spa a nightmare on your back.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

xQunKTk.png This applies to the gameplay side of things, too. Ernst never goes to help Pavlov. And when you see what his stats look like, you'll be profoundly grateful for that.

Considering how Dagon was acting, I'm surprised Ernst has the guts to just not bother.

I assume he'd tell whoever did order him to help Pavlov to back out.

5 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

gAbVkav.pngTo be honest, I'm curious why you haven't already disappeared. It's not like you have family to worry about.

twhnfrc.pngWell, wouldn't it be trouble for you?

gAbVkav.pngWhat are you talking about? I'm not going to be court-martialed just because a known troublemaker deserted.

twhnfrc.pngHaha, you've got a point. You're a good man, General. Take care of yourself.

Mintz: such an irrelevant scamp that nobody would care if he deserted.

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Apparently I avoided double-posting. What do you know?

Anyway, since I'm in this odd situation, I may as well go over some stuff that I missed in the last update:

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Sure. Blame the dead guys incompetence for your failure...

...Did we fight Admiral Vals already, or was that off-screen?

On 11/27/2018 at 4:39 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

tN4k68u.pngYour father told us to escape while he and his men held off the Imperial Army, but do you think we deserve to survive if we had to sacrifice him to get away?

FF3NqbQ.pngDon't beat yourself up about it, Runan. It was his choice. Hell, he might not even be dead. He's always been a tenacious little rat.

BoSm6tt.png

Oh. So he was a good guy...

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

ZPv0w5a.png

...Wait, Canaanite? We're fighting the Canaanites? The land of Canaan, the Promised Land of Israel?

...Did Kaga just make another biblical reference?

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Hawkwing, if you still have doubts about this game being seriously sexist, look at this screenshot and then tell me with a straight face that this game doesn't treat women fairly. I dare you.

The games words say one thing, it's actions speak another.

For some reason, this reminds me of how in Gaiden, most of the female characters have to be rescued, but once they're on the battlefield, they kick butt.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

Raffin, take the key and one bag of money. The observant reader may've noticed that the member key has uses. That's right: every time go into the Secret Shop, the number of uses goes down by one. You do need to buy something, though. If you leave without adquiring any goods, the key will not lose any uses. The second you buy or sell anything, though, you can buy 1 item or 100, the key will lose one use either way.

Interesting way of ensuring the player doesn't get screwed over for accidental window-shopping, yet it still encourages them not to waste their resources once they actually buy something.

On 1/4/2019 at 10:21 AM, Saint Rubenio said:

SRfkSD9.png

And we got the hilarious spell!

Nice! Time to burn our opponents to a crisp!

...Although then we'll be remembered of poor Seamus's sacrifice everytime we use it...

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

vNs6BvI.png

0zFk3fj.png Man, he got utterly carbonized... I'm shocked, and I was the one who made the edit! Although, to be fair, I could've made him look like a real burn victim instead of simply pouring ash all over him. That wouldn't have been pleasant in the slightest.

Considering that Two-Face from The Dark Knight originally had realistic burns, but that caused the test audiences to get nauseous, you made a wise decision.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

tN4k68u.pngOf course. We will guarantee the safety of those who surrender willingly, in accordance with the laws of Razelia. You have nothing to fear, General.

0zFk3fj.png Those who surrender willingly? Who are those? We killed everyone!

EqgwLzh.png

IfRBMws.png Oh... I understand...

Image result for mustafa spare my men

..Hard to do on the higher difficulties when you need the experience...

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

vUN6DQJ.pngThe Empire is likely not as stable as it seems, milord. King Bahanuk of Canaan spent twenty long years in his campaign to unite the nations of the Zoa Valley into the Empire. No doubt there is still much lingering bitterness over his warmongering. Not only that, but his decision to ally with the Cult of Gerxel has no dout weakened the Empire's stability further.

69ju4He.png

0zFk3fj.png I smell a Gharnef.

A female Gharnef. That's a new one.

...Steal from Kaga, IS! Although then they'd try and maker her "sympathetic" or what not.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png I now smell Camuses.

Three of them. That's a new one.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

tN4k68u.pngBut then Mousa burned all of that to ash...

vUN6DQJ.pngIndeed. And not only the two of them, but also the thousands of Nolzerian citizens...

Ah, so it was a spelling error.

... Part of me wants to change the meme I made, but it got such a great laugh out of us, I think I'll keep it for the memories.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

mrLKorM.png

0zFk3fj.png It's not exactly a great mystery, is it?

Cult killing! Despite it being one of the less interesting parts about Fire Emblem, it always has to appear, for some reason.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

WzWeFrL.png

Seamus gave us his +12 defense shield. Thank you, man. I'll make the most of it.

Dang, that's same as the Dracoshield in Gaiden/Echoes. Of course, they can't break in those games, but you can still get a use out of the Steel Shield in this game.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

RVaJyoh.pngSnpF8OK.pngWeDcKgL.png

Seems like a reasonable way to keep them in the story without having them impact gameplay too much.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

vUN6DQJ.pngNarcus has fled, milord!

I suppose that is one of the "downsides" you mentioned earlier.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

tN4k68u.pngYou seem quite incensed today, Eugen. Is something the matter?

vUN6DQJ.pngThe tihng is... Narcus broke into our treasure hold and made off with half of our war funds.

tN4k68u.pngHalf of our funds?!

IfRBMws.png Oh, no! All those... 300 pieces of gold!

And another downside Narcus brings.

Something tells me this either screws the player over a lot or a little depending on their finances at the moment.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

wiAehT0.png

Oh, it's you!

qaRBlgC.pngI beg of you, if you would only give us a little while longer, I promise we will pay in full!

Lego Fire Emblem. Why isn't that a thing yet?

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

wT5XUU4.png

0zFk3fj.png ...I don't think I need to say anything, do I?

IfRBMws.png But I still will! What is that? Why do you have a cross-shaped scar on your forehead? Why are you carrying around a riding crop? When did you decide it was a good idea to grow Waluigi's moustache? And the hair! If I couldn't see your face, with that slim build I might think you're a woman! That's one heck of an awful surprise to be had!

That... is a very strange mixture of things.

I don't know if I want to know what was going through the artists head when he was designed...

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

xQunKTk.png You know, I actually like the dynamic these two have. Don't get me wrong, they're both horribly unlikeable, but it's rare to see two throwaways who just happen to be friends and are having a casual conversation about how they're both evil and they love it. It's pretty good, it gives them both more character than the usual "guy who stands on the seize point".

They're definitely slimy and I want you to get creative with their death portraits.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png As for Carnell... I can't say I understand his plan. If he kills the rebel, Lionheart will go berserk on him, so... he just makes her disappear in a different way? How is that going to change the outcome, exactly? Is he going to hide under his bed and, when Lionheart comes for him, scream "wait, I don't have her! Pavlov of Senay has her! Go get him!"?

Maybe he's hoping he can use the "[Rebel name]? Haven't seen her" excuse. Or that Pavlov will keep her alive but "silent" until it's safe to realease/be rid of her.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You know, as much as I like how well-written he is, I still look forward to the moment I can stab him repeatedly. And we haven't seen anything yet...

Again, kill him creatively. And maybe watch gameplay of Mortal Kombat over the next few days to get some ideas.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

soiQK3r.pngI'll teach you to defy me, woman! Take that! And that! And that!

RyOwF3h.png

0zFk3fj.png Okay, so, two questions. First, why does Pavlov need his generic underling to tell him that the prisoner is knocked out? Does he not have eyes? And second... Eritz? Did they really recolor Eritz? That's almost as bad as Morgan being a recolor of the one memorable earlygame boss in FE6. Almost. Except... wait, it's not exactly Eritz, is he? He's got Eritz's head, but his body's different. And in the Tear Ring Saga dev blog (yes, that's a thing), the artwork for Eritz actually matches this portrait rather than the one he had. Ugh... my head's spinning. Where were we again?

Have you ever seen someone when they're angry and attacking someone? How they often have to be pulled back to stop hurting the other person? Pavlov probably entered that state.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

xNv2HAU.png

0zFk3fj.png Oh, yeah, and as if he wasn't unapologetically bad enough already, he's going to have her killed anyway, which is exactly what Carnell wanted to avoid. What a good friend, this guy. Is there any part of him that isn't irredeemably evil?

Excellent question. Go far enough to get a few warning points when you kill him. Please.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

TgiEDow.png

xQunKTk.png Ah, what a breath of fresh air! You look recruitable.

His forehead is large, but nice facial hair. He looks like a noble rogue.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

twhnfrc.pngSure, that's simple enough. Leave it to me.

twhnfrc.png...Which way is the dungeon?

xQunKTk.png Mintz is a lovable bastard. You'll see why later, in what's one of my favourite scenes in the entire game.

Heheheh. It's a simple joke, but a laugh was needed after what events just occurred.

I'm interested in seeing what this "favorite scene" is...

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

twhnfrc.pngHave a nice nap? Seems like the medicine helped a bit. Your fever's gone, at least.

i2FbJok.pngYou... You stayed here in the dungeon with me...? You were by my side the whole time?

twhnfrc.pngWell, I wasn't so much as(sic) by your side as letting you sleep on my lap...

i2FbJok.pngOh, goodness...!

cWV4VSn.png

hTMofYU.png Hahahahahah! What a huge dork.

Seems like this guy will be an entertaining character.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

twhnfrc.pngI'm Mintz.

Image result for mint candy

I had to

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

twhnfrc.pngWell, Miss Leonie, I don't think a cell like this is befitting for a young lady like yourself. I'm gonna go have a chat with my superior, and then I'll come get you out. Just stay here and keep your head down for a little while longer, got it?

That... will end well...

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yes, please do go talk with your superior. It's a hilarious sequence.

Oh. Well in that case, it should end better than I originally thought it would.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

qaRBlgC.pngAs I have said multiple times, the Empire has allowed Senay to remain autonomous only under the condition that we remain neutral. Therefore, we absolutely cannot allow enemies of the Empire into the city.

vUN6DQJ.pngYou pick sides, yet you would still call yourselves neutral? Imperial forces are assembling in the north, and they will soon descend upon us. Their attack will inevitably take them through Senay territory if unopposed.

qaRBlgC.pngThis war has nothing to do with us. Getting involved will only cause us trouble. Now please, withdraw your troops at once, or we will be forced to defend ourselves.

I'm curious what this "neutrality" is comparable to in real life. After all, some countries in WW2 stayed neutral because they had little to contribute to the war, while Spain and Portugal had finished with a Civil war and were in no condition to fight, but still secretly supported the Axis. Switzerland would have been for the Allies, but remained neutral because that would have been begin to be massacred, and Sweden was a save haven for escaping Jews.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

hTMofYU.png Eugen steals yet another scene. Hahahah!

There are few where he doesn't.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png Oh, look, sexism.

F*ck

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

orfi8jp.pngBah, our mayor's such a fool... Why'd he waste money on a lass like you instead of hiring a big, burly man? Sorry, lady, but you just don't look cut out for the job. Know what I mean?

You're asking to get your butt kicked and your bones broken by her, aren't you?

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

xQunKTk.png Hell yeah, you showed her, Billford! Except you're a knight and unless she uses an estoc or an armorslayer, you'd have her beat before she could even get you down to half your health bar. But still, good effort!

it's the thought that counts. And they don't know that.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png One thing's clear: white armor was a good choice for this man.

You got that right.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png I suppose this is as good a time as any to mention the fact that Sharon here was my first casualty in my last run of this game. With any luck the story won't repeat itself.

With hope, it will not.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

J2e0c2Q.png

At first glance, I would have asked why he was wearing a pot on his head, but I take that thought back. He looks like trouble.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png You thought that sounded sketchy? You haven't seen anything. This chapter features one of the most infamous moments of this game, and these two are its protagonists.

Oh no...

Oh... no... no...

Let me find and prepare some Mortal Kombat gifs...

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ah, finally, here it is! One of my personal favourite scenes of the game!

Great! Lets see how this plays out...

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

xQunKTk.png Ah, yes, the Zoa camps are better than 5 star hotels. They give free massages! With a whip, but still, it's the intention that counts!

That... is black humor at it's finest.

It's also the kind of black humor were I barely restrain from punching the person in the face.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

BY1v7K4.png

twhnfrc.pngHahaha! Oh, poor Pavlov. Well, that's a load off my mind.

xQunKTk.png This applies to the gameplay side of things, too. Ernst never goes to help Pavlov. And when you see what his stats look like, you'll be profoundly grateful for that.

Gameplay and story integration: Awesome when it leads to moments like these.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

twhnfrc.pngOh, one more thing, General. If I were to suddenly disappear, what would you do?

2yQh43C.png

hTMofYU.png Bahahahahah... oh, these two. I love 'em.

They do have a great dynamic. Hope that this isn't their only interaction.

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png Actually, I don't believe you ever do have to do that.

I can see why this is  your your favorite scene in the game.

Now for next time...

l5yEq1.gif

Give some characters hell.

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7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Erstaz. That's a nice word I didn't know. I'll be sure to keep it in mind.

I don't normally like doing spelling corrections because to be honest I don't think spelling is that important unless mistakes cause errors in communication, but since English is your second language and this is evidently a new word to you regardless, it's spelled "ersatz".

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I honestly like it better this way. Sure, women aren't better in every single way, but they aren't worse in every single way either. Balance, that's the key word here. Not to mention, there are plenty of badass women in the series.

Yeah, I agree with you here (for one thing, Fire Emblem would be really boring if your units were too similar to each other). My comments that might have suggested otherwise are mostly out of frustration at how, to get more specific, Fir, Marisa, and Mia are worse in every way that matters compared to Rutger, Joshua, and Zihark (although, Fir isn't obnoxiously edgelordy the way Rutger is, to be fair), and then there's Karla who might be the worst unit in the entire series accounting for recruitment cost.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

69ju4He.png

Isn't this literally how Nergal got control of the Black Fang in FE7?

Now I'm starting to see why people say that game is a ripoff of this one.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

qfDCxk6.pngfpdrWdo.png

Just want to say that this entire scene is hilarious. Eugen and Albertus just having a go at each other is great, if obviously ill-advised given they're supposed to be in an alliance. I particularly like how mad Eugen gets at being called "Grumpy Grandpa."

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

RVaJyoh.pngSnpF8OK.pngWeDcKgL.png

Fortunately, Runan's here to be reasonable and prevent any of that from having lasting consequences. Since Matthis's troops basically did the job of a rearguard last battle anyway, it makes sense to put them there, in addition to working as a lasting story justification for why we won't see them in gameplay. (Maybe I'm making too big a deal of that last bit, given that you have off-screen armies in most Fire Emblem games anyway... either way, it's a nice detail)

8 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

IfRBMws.png When did you decide it was a good idea to grow Waluigi's moustache?

What did Waluigi ever do to deserve this insult?

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

2yQh43C.png

I read this line with complete seriousness at first and was about to make some sort of self-deprecating joke about it like "Ernst is the most relatable character in this game" but then I read it again and realized it's supposed to be mostly sarcastic

anyway, Mintz is the most relatable character in this game

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10 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh, so he did! I was aware that he rewrote some parts of the script, but I didn't know that was one of them.

Perhaps it'd be more appropriate to say that Aethin's Richard is one of the most interesting characters in my eyes, then.

Not sure how to really talk about this considering the whole No Spoiler thing and given the size of the game it will probably take months until we actually get to that part. But let's just say, he really is as petty and spiteful as he presents himself.

Edited by BrightBow
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Just now, Saint Rubenio said:

I don't know which country you're from, but I'm pretty sure one shouldn't be seriously supporting anyone in another country's elections. Like here, in Spain, all we had to go on for the US elections was what the TV said, and all the TV said was that Trump was nuts and nothing at all about Clinton. And the US is the country we hear from the most. We're right next to Portugal, but if you only watched TV you'd know absolutely nothing about it.

In my case, what really bugged me was these were people who have always said about how apolitical they are and mocked me for bothering to vote in our own Country's elections "because all politicians are corrupt so it's the same result" (while there's truth to it, the fact they can say it on their election then 180 on another country's is ridiculous). What do you call it when someone is hypocritical enough to care about another country's elections more than their own? I mean unless they live in North Korea or somewhere with a rigged vote. That's different. My location of course is a subtle nod based off the fact I've joked about the Archanean continent being Eurasia, with Talys being Japan. Ergo there's a few places a smaller landmass to the South of the Asian region could be.

Just now, Saint Rubenio said:

That's why I love TRS. It does that, but polishing off both of Gaiden's crippling flaws that kept me from being too interested in the game: god-awful map design (there are some bad maps here, like in every game, but at least it's not every one of them like in Gaiden) and tiny playable cast (which hinders replayability).

I maintain, there's a handful of maps I like in Gaiden (The Great Gate, Rigel and Zofia Castles, the final battle with Duma, the ship maps, Greith's citadel, Mila's temple, and Nuibaba's abode). Each of these maps have one thing in common. Namely they're not a flat field and work best with a plan. Ironically, the replayability issue hasn't bugged me much on Gaiden either. Each time I play through, I come up with some rule or other. Whether it's "all villagers are mercenaries/archers/mages/soldiers" or "Alm/Celica are the only ones allowed to kill a boss", it works. That said, the fact it's a spiritual successor to Gaiden we have here is certainly a draw, and it really makes me regret my computer is on the verge of it's demise.

Just now, Saint Rubenio said:

Don't compare JJJ to real life media harpies. JJJ's the best thing ever. Just check out his laugh! Nobody with such a laugh could possibly be anything but the most joyful person alive!

Funny enough, I have an old Sgt Fury (as in Nick Fury, the white one, not hus black son Marvel replaced him with to make him look like his actor in 2012) issue set in the bygone days of WWII (after all, this issue was from the early 1970s), where J. Jonah Jameson was editor of the Daily Bugle even back in the war, and sent a reporter as a war correspondent with Nick Fury and His Howling commandoes because said reporter kept trying to fake news on the war (that is he'd make up articles and try to get them past Jameson despite the fact he was faking it). Funny lesson there. Even Jameson didn't like fake reports. Unless they were on vigilantes, which clouded his judgement because of how his first wife, Joan, happened to die

Just now, Saint Rubenio said:

What worries me is that someone, at some point in time, has sent a Frollo love card to their significant other. Please tell me it wasn't you.

While the poorly made card was my handiwork, it was made for an online joke rather than actually being sent on valentines day. So unless someone else sent it after seeing it, I'm innocent... as yet.

Just now, Saint Rubenio said:

I like the "Eugen is literally God" theory. Let's go for that.

Just gonna leave this here
Oe6p9H6.png

Just now, Saint Rubenio said:

Naturally it didn't work and he is serving 315 years and six months to life imprisonment. Effectually, he comes up for parole in 2309. Provided someone finds a way to extend his life that long. Hatboy obviously copped it a bit worse, seeing as he got the death-penalty. Or maybe that's lenient.

Hatman got burned by Lee. It's not as lenient as it's leenient.

 

Just now, Saint Rubenio said:

You know. Because spontaneous expressions of rage lead to several weeks of planning. Naturally it didn't work and he is serving 315 years and six months to life imprisonment. Effectually, he comes up for parole in 2309. Provided someone finds a way to extend his life that long. Hatboy obviously copped it a bit worse, seeing as he got the death-penalty. Or maybe that's lenient.

He got thunder'd by Lee. It's not as lenient as it's leenient.

Amazing. Two replies to one statement. It's because you had to rub in I missed a Lee pun.
 

Just now, Saint Rubenio said:

I smell a Gharnef.

Smells like brimstone. Elfire and Brimstone. Maybe she'd like a nice Valentines day card?

17 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

But I still will! What is that? Why do you have a cross-shaped scar on your forehead? Why are you carrying around a riding crop? When did you decide it was a good idea to grow Waluigi's moustache? And the hair! If I couldn't see your face, with that slim build I might think you're a woman! That's one heck of an awful surprise to be had!

Slim build, Waluigi moustache, hair dyed (I maintain) purple. Obviously someone worked out it was easier to get into Smash Bros as a Fire Emblem Character these days.

17 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

xNv2HAU.png

0zFk3fj.png Oh, yeah, and as if he wasn't unapologetically bad enough already, he's going to have her killed anyway, which is exactly what Carnell wanted to avoid. What a good friend, this guy. Is there any part of him that isn't irredeemably evil?

Burning at the stake? Must resist urge to Frollo-post.

18 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

e6cdbis.png

Read this as "spamming match". Imagined them playing brawl as Meta-Knight.

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On 6/1/2019 at 2:42 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

You may not, but someone may, and that's enough for me. It's green because green's the best color, shut up it is.

You're goddamn right.

 

On 6/1/2019 at 4:59 PM, Hawkwing said:

I chose my current one after finding out that Blustone was getting a (technical) sequel, and I just love this awesome artwork.

Damn, now I've got to look that game up.

 

On 6/1/2019 at 2:42 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

...YOU are the RNGoddess, aren't you? I've got you all figured out!

That explains why my luck with gacha games is awful, i've been accidentally giving it away all this time! Cries in Grand Order

 

On 6/1/2019 at 2:42 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

Out of curiousity, have you ever read the rest of the LP, or have you just jumped in and started to reply as if you knew what the heck is going on?

I have, actually. Who do you take me for?

 

On 6/1/2019 at 2:42 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

qaRBlgC.pngI beg of you, if you would only give us a little while longer, I promise we will pay in full!

Oh hi Barth. How's your... brick life?

 

On 6/1/2019 at 2:42 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

wT5XUU4.png

waluigi.jpg.a1de2def733cd7b6178c11fd715ace47.jpg

 

On 6/1/2019 at 2:42 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

TgiEDow.png

General Ernst? Wrong pseudo-FE strategy game, mate.

 

On 6/1/2019 at 2:42 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

soiQK3r.pngHold, Black Knight. I have a task for you.

Black Knight? How many does that make, like twenty?

 

On 6/1/2019 at 2:42 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

twhnfrc.png...Which way is the dungeon?

whatsanairportagain.png.e373ed88113ce11404ce2b0cedb358e7.png...What's an airport, again?

 

Same Energy.

 

On 6/1/2019 at 2:42 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png In the old transition she was called "Rennie". I think I like the new one better.

No shit. Remember that the Japanese can't differentiate an R from an L. In the old translation se was called Lenny!

 

On 6/1/2019 at 2:42 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

dmjtHNP.png

hTMofYU.png Eugen steals yet another scene. Hahahah!

Is it just me, or is Eugen way more aggresive today than usual? Gasp! Could this be character development?

 

On 6/1/2019 at 2:42 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png I suppose this is as good a time as any to mention the fact that Sharon here was my first casualty in my last run of this game. With any luck the story won't repeat itself.

Not on my watch!

 

wristwatch.jpg.3941779294a23786793a5d53c09b5bfd.jpg

Edited by Franp3
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5 hours ago, Franp3 said:

Black Knight? How many does that make, like twenty?

You mean groups or individual members of said groups? Because I think it's two groups, assuming Ernst leads one of them. If he does not though, I'm not sure how Mintz could be a Black Knight.

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Part 19 -  Death, misery and terrible people.

My classes have started again, so the updating will probably slow down a little. Also, Imgur was being dumb the other day, but that's not of any importance right now.

Replies:

Spoiler
On 6/1/2019 at 8:59 PM, Hawkwing said:

Dang it! Just missed it!

That you did.

Anyway, long story short, I'll be taking a computer/electronic fast over the next few days due to personal reasons that need not be elaborated here. The only two exceptions will be for getting college stuff done and commenting on this Lets Play.

I'm honored that you'd make an exception to watch me ramble.

Huh, interesting. Wonder what you mean by it sounding "counterintuitive" on paper.

With any luck, you'll see.

Also, Kaga did "only one character wields dark magic" first.

When it comes to FE7, you can just safely assume he did pretty much everything first. I'm not even kidding, that's the worst part.

It's been over a year since I last played Heroes, but I do remember that the story chapters started out easy, but you soon unlock harder difficulties for them. My best unit was Lukas, as he had the movement of an infantry unit but the defense and attack of a tank. Sadly, the game got to big for my phone, and I eventually had to delete it.

I don't know how much stuff they added since I last played, and I don't see much of a reason to go back to it as Blustone scratched the itch it left behind.

I understand. Maybe I should check out the higher difficulties then.

Yep! Makos face is perfect for showing annoyed disapproval.

I seem to alternate between "characters looking annoyed" and "random pictures I have saved to my computer for some reason" for my avatar picture. I chose my current one after finding out that Blustone was getting a (technical) sequel, and I just love this awesome artwork.

It is pretty good, I agree.

A slight bit better, although I still passed by it a few times.

Maybe it's not so much the color, but the title size? I don't want to sound like a Complaining Cassie here (if that's even a thing).

Man, at this rate I'm gonna end up making the title so huge, it'll take an entire page.

I still think that season three, where Sonic and Co. went into space, would actually make for a good Sonic game. Exploring different planets would allow them to get creative and diverse with the level design, and it would also allow them to create a longer game without having to stretch playtime artificially.

I don't know, I'm not the biggest fan of Sonic. Or the biggest player of Sonic. Or the biggest anything of Sonic.

That is a pretty accurate description. Only other thing worth bringing up is that he is one of three characters you have to unlock.

You have to unlock Batman with a fish in this game. Amazing.

Lucky duck. The fights, memes, and videogames are pretty awesome.

Ah, the videogames. I've only played one, myself, Revenge of the Sith for the DS. Pretty fun Beat 'Em Up, all things considered.

Well, you could get creative with the avatar, but that's the closest you're going to get.

A shame.

Eh. I don't mind it too much, but it's really because the rules apply to the enemy as much as they do the player. Magic hurts no matter who's on the receiving end, and while it is more costly for the player to summon cannon fodder, it's just as unlimited. That, and there are some tricks and tactics to get around cantors.

I see.

Monkey Island is an awesome game. Lucasarts earned their reputation for being masters of humor.

Hahah... of course!

"But Ruben, how many times have things not gone as you predicted, but for the better?"

Ergh, well... some times, I guess.

If this ends up becoming a larger meme, I'm claiming credit for it.

Understandably so.

I've tried the demo for it. It's odd that the face buttons control the camera, especially when the original game worked fine with a fixed one, but at least nothing is pressure sensitive this time around. Means that you can't slit the throat of a guard you meant to interrogate by accident anymore (unless you have serious butter fingers).

Never underestimate a man's butter fingers.

Don't worry. I remember exactly where I left off. It shouldn't take a whole lot of time to complete it (hopefully).

Ah, okay, that's good.

Related image

Bah... you know nothing.

He was a Colonel. But this is the realm of fiction, is it not?

I suppose this being fiction it is allowed to take some liberties.

You dare say that about my second favorite character from Awakening!

...Despite the fact the I joke that Lucina X Laurent is the only thing I ship, entirely due to how I've exploited their fast support growth and how they're the only two characters I can reliably manage to get to together in every single playthrough of the game I've done.

I just find the glasses to be a bit jarring. It's not like Etzel/Canas, who wear old-fashioned monocles, and they aren't the classic tiny, round spectacles either. Laurent and his mother's glasses are very modern-looking, and it bothers me a little.

Really, though, I find the complaint that Awakening is "shipping emblem" to not be as prevalent as people make it out to be. Although To be fair, S-supports are all over the place in terms of quality, and the fact that how "believable" they are will inherently range from person to person doesn't help. Not to mention how those aspects affected Fates development...

You aren't helping the game's case, although to be fair, I don't mind it as much as some other people do.

I see.

You do!

That too.

Glad to hear it got a laugh.

It did, indeed. Congrats.

Except that would have been a complicated process of starting the game, taking pictures on my phone, getting lucky with two quotse, uploading them somewhere and then creating the meme, all for a single joke.

Especially when I've seen the picture before somewhere.

Ah, well, that's okay.

...I would joke about that, except that feminism just flips the issue instead of solving it. That, and the damage they've done to the positive aspects of masculinity is concerning, and this is coming from a guy that isn't a fan of such things.

The way I see it, both sides make some good points and a fuck-load of bad ones, and both sides do lots of dumb shit that undermine the good points they do make. I dread the day I have to go vote (my parents are going to force me), because as far as I'm concerned, neither side's all that good. Does that make me a terrible person and a supporter of "the enemies"? I guess so, but I just can't, for the life of me, find a solid reason to vote one side over the other.

I mean, Codha was spared. Maybe this guy won't turn out to be a bad guy and is instead just an ally that is also an @$$hole

We'll just have to wait.

In matters where one could potentially be wrong, always leave a way out.

Exactly. That's the way to go about it.

But does Richard truly know thyself?

I don't think so. He probably thinks he's great, and that's it.

Which just means that if he strived to work towards removind the "d*ck" part of him, he could be quite a reasonable fellow.

That's a lot of ruffle he has to work on removing.

Please tell me that a "guy looks like a girl" character is in this game, and that Eugen attempts to salvage something golden from his mistake.

It would be a very Eugen sequence, to be sure.

A humble opinion I agree with.

Good! That's a win for me!

Related image

Exactly.

This just excites me further...

That came out wrong, did it not?

Captian Barker! That just sounds like something out of an 80s cartoon and I love it.

Can you all stop saying Barker's an 80s name? I'm a fucking 20 year old kiddo, I don't get these jokes at all! Make jokes about things a filthy millenial like myself can understand, like, uh... 50 year old videogames! Yeah, that works.

I just realized the ambiguousness of the word "that" in the sentence.

Apparently, I have a lot of moments of retroactive cleverness.

Right? My regards for that.

Eugen and Runan walking along in the desert. Runan asks the question, to which Eugen deadpannly responds. The camera zoom out, revealing they've separated from the group, and Runan animatedly panics...

I really do want to see that animated now.

Someone needs to do it.

Oooh! A chameleon is in this game.

Certainly explains how he disguised himself as Codha earlier. Although I'm questioning if I want to know the details of how now...

I prefer not to think about it.

At the very least, grab the 100% shards, grab a big stick, shapren it into a spear, and use a dirty cloth, another piece of glass, and the melee skill to make a makeshift spear!

Neo Scavanger joke

Sounds very much like a survival sandbox kinda game. With any luck, at least you don't punch trees in that one.

Guess that's one way to look at the positive side of things.

A bad way!

Huh. Interesting to hear she even has an idle animation.

I can't tell if she's shooting that out of her eyes, her throat, or her heart.

Her hands. I just happened to catch the flare frame.

They may not be goofy, but this is more than a satisfactory replacement.

I suppose so, although I already miss when she was the one to do the flying.

Perhaps she's taking after superheroes with no killing rules, and is thus getting creative with how to incapacitate her foes.

Does that mean when she caps strength she goes for the most painful spot?

You know what I mean: the kneecap.

That is hilariously pathetic.

In a good way. Let the enemy die an embarrassing death!

Hey, thanks to her, they temporarily become the star of the show.

Also, does this mean Meriel is a fan of the "magic girl" genre or whatever it's called? And oh my gosh I just realized that Meriel is one letter off from Miriel.

Oh, look, it's Anachronic Glasses Mom.

I can see why Pegasus riders usually wield lances now.

Sasha can do it too, but she has swords on top of that.

In-universe, I'm blaming the smoke from the fire spell.

Decent explanation.

Interesting how that turned out.

Right?

Huh, guess they didn't keep the "weapon affects the sprite" thing from the SNES games.

Can't blame them, though. Given how many unique weapons there are in this game.

Weapons change colors, so I guess that's good enough?

So these are the "witches" that @Interdimensional Observer brought up. Are they "balanced" by the the all-over-the-place AI Gaiden/Echoes witches had (which at the very least had a good story reason for why that was so) or are they capable of more tactical decisions?

Their AI's bollocks, so I guess that's it.

I never expected the day when I would hear of something out-tanking a tank.

Only in TRS!

And what do you know? They're even wearing similar attire to Echoes witches.

KDIF!

Other in-universe explanation: Meriel knows that you're taking screenshots of her and doesn't like it.

I laughed too hard at this.

...I'm trying to remember whether or not any of the Fire Emblem games do that.

Pretty sure none of 'em do.

Nosferatu is a giant snake!?!?

That's... That is...

AWESOME!!!

I know!

Course, I could complain that the snake just shoots something at the foe rather than bite them, but I can see the trauma that can put into players of seeing their favorite character die a hideous death of being swallowed alive.

That would not only be nigh impossible to animate, it'd be... well, okay, it'd be even more amazing, but still, I'm fine with the way it is.

I kinda question how you're supposed to doge being wrapped around by a giant snake, but I'm not complaining.

I said it, you sidestep the sparkles.

"But Ruben, how many times have things not gone as you predicted, but for the better?"

Hahahahah... touché, I guess.

No joke, one of my best friends was electrocuted once as a kid, and it really did drastically alter his personality.

With that said, he's one of the most eccentric people I know, and I take everything he says with a grain of salt.

I'm sorry for him.

To this day, people still wonder what Raiden says.

All that's missing is for Superlee to do the same move.

The Raiden rocket, you mean?

Sounds both useful and useless. Copying stats seems more straightforward, although copying bases wouldn't be so bad in a game like gaiden/echoes.

Curious as to what this other drawback is.

There you go!

He'd better be eating those words!

More or less, he did.

He is, although I get the feeling he'll die soon.

Yep. At least he died as a bad@$$

Exactly.

Doesn't quite look like a skeleton, but at the same time, you might actually get in trouble with a mod if you showed realistic burns.

I probably would.

I swear, if this bastard warps away at the last second...

Nah, he doesn't have a magical bottle that revives him this time.

Maybe they're a DnD party or a group of point-and-click adventurers? Or maybe this worlds version of the Monty Pythons are filming the Holy Grail of this universe?

Interesting theories.

It's like Lee has invincibililee from a platformer power-up.

You, as well?!

All that's missing is for Lee to awesomelee do this:

Image result for the last jedi skywalker gif

That would've been too good.

Giving credit where credit is due, he ain't a coward.

Which just means that for us, he shall trouble us no longer.

He was devoted to the Cause of the Hat.

Y'know? As much as we've been joking that Kaga did things first, he really wasn't trying very hard to avoid copyright rules at points.

Yeah, he really thought he'd get away with this.

Considering that Pre-Awakening Anna decided to hide her shops in the oddest of locations, an old mans basement isn't too far-fetched.

Maybe it's some kind of act that the old man plays for customers, and he and Anna are business partners. Heck, maybe in times of peace, it's an attraction for kids, where a key is hidden somewhere in the desert, they easily find it, he shouts the phrase, and Anna sells stuffed animals instead of weapons.

Something to think about.

Interesting.

And since you posted right when I got online, I shall risk double-posting!

No, you won't, because Dayni.

 

On 7/1/2019 at 12:57 AM, Dayni said:

Considering how irrelevant Zweihardt is I think he's come around on magic.

Also I'm surprised that you kept at it.

He probably just skimmed through all the 18 updates he missed only counting the WaSs.

Certainly was resolved faster.

Definitely so.

Don't shut up, it's Green.

GREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN

Did you get unlucky enough to get 10 Saizos?

I only remember being disappointed every time I got a ninja. Don't think I ever bothered looking at their names.

I mean, the Gacha giveth.... sometimes and the Gacha taketh all the bleeding time.

It did give me Seth. I guess... something? I like Seth enough.

Clearly you hadn't gotten round to the Lunatic Chain Challenges.

That'll make you cry with a smaller roster.

Hey, I want a challenge, not bullshit that forces me to grind to beat it.

Would like to have actually seen a town like mode, Aether raids isn't quite it after all.

I don't even understand those. Aside from the piss-poor matchmakng (once, I got a raid where my opponent had just randomly placed the starting guys at base level. The inmediately next raid had 5 star units at level 40.), I can't figure out how to become eligible as an opponent.

Yeah, see I didn't think of it like that. I did think he had that sword with him.

There you go, then, an alternative theory.

Wrys wandering the world this whole time, only to hear about Marth moving out to Macedon and barely finding them in 3x.

That sounds like a neat story.

Very Wrys, indeed.

I decided I had to take a swing at it now:

SDA.png

Looks good. I'd buy.

(On closer inspection, that sword is massive compared to her and the pegasus.

Not quite massive, it's just way too long for her. Guess she likes 'em big no stop Ruben she's underage you'll get banned I'll shut up now.

I mean, if they need rocket launchers to take her out she's grand, right?

Right?

There's tanks in this game.

I guess you forgot Aladdin's ending.

Probably because I never even watched Aladdin. Never was much of a Disney kid. Heck, I only watched The Lion King for the first time last year.

I mean, explain Alejandro.

The problem with Alejandro is that the spanish "j" sound doesn't seem to exist in the english alphabet. It's sort of like when you're trying to spit, and you make a horrendous raspy sound. Could also be described as a more intense "h". Other than that, it's really easy. No gimmickies here, you just say it as you'd read it.

I think then we'll explain Naoise or Niamh. Or Saorise.

Those... those seem like random gibberish.

I mean, he could secretly be a powerful mage. I mean, Not Anna's probably rich enough to hire a powerful guard.

He does have the eyes of a wise sage.

You could have made him look like Skeletor that way, for the best to avoid it.

Yeah.

Man, what a killer personality.

Hah! Funny.

I smell a Sonya.

Sonia*

Well then, that's an awkward situation, seeing your peace literally burn down alongside thousands of lives. And yourself.

Ouch.

I mean, he would certainly have insulted them.

I don't know if that would have worked, but who knows?

Maybe he's secretely an OP fighter, but just doesn't want to bother?

I mean, they both had to be told to stop jeopardising everything. It's not like it was all one sided-

vUN6DQJ.png"He's still a little shit."

Eugen's so godly he hacked your SF account to trash-talk Albertus.

Or roast them.

Possibly roast them.

That's more likely, given who he is.

"First that silly medallion dares insult you and then the man I trusted robbed us!"

Eugen Fuck-ups: 2 (Even if this one didn't backfire as hard because of your indulgences at the secret shop)

Two is still a small number. He has a lot of room to screw up before he catches up to the titanic number of moments he's been amazing.

I mean, I knew this was coming, 

Same did I. Even if it didn't look like it. More on that later.

Honestly though, execution's a bit uncreative though, he could do crueller things.

He could fuck up his face!

He looks like someone chose to make Dolph older and then stretch them out.

I mean, it does make sense that Macellan looks like that in his waning years.

Poor Macellan.

Well, he must stress himself out all the time to have that furrowed a brow (or he was branded at one point. That could be interesting considering how he acts towards the cult), the crop is quite clear later on and I will say Pavlov's conditioner must be impressive.

What the hell are you trying to say with "furrowed brow"? The cross doesn't even extend all the way down to his brows! It's just sorta there!

See?

Maybe they got to him once and he swore never again.

Smart man.

Well, maybe he assumes they'll leave when he says that?

I mean, he is an utter asshole.

And an utter idiot, too.

Official translations can swear.

Once or twice.

Once or twice doesn't quite cover what is going to happen today.

Also, no Pavlov that's not how you condition someone. I swear, these namesakes are less and less fitting each time.

Quite unlike Lawrence. He was a General, just like Lawrence. Isn't that right?

Well, he needed someone to tell him because he's really into his whipping (I could see him playing this in the background if that technology existed.)

What a dastard!

I mean, I can't really comment on the recolour. Hell, other titles in FE have been even less capable of making changes (See Awakening's paralogue bosses?)

Morgan. 'Nuff said.

Course, Carnell should have seen it coming from the guy who carries a whip around for the sake of it.

Carnell's not very bright, is he?

Mintz, the knight with a black mark on his record for inappropriate behaviour.

Is that why he got sent to the camp?

Poor man... he does not deserve these jokes.

I mean, I'd like that video of Xander I linked in the last LP, but I don't think I need to.

He says it for me. What a twit.

I remember that.

I mean, it was a good call considering Rennie's an antacid.

I don't think dropping a Leonie has the same strange connotations.

Hahaha, what? Really? Oh, good lord...

I mean, I have to assume that he's just being himself for this.

Was this match just after the Burn Incursion?

Probably so.

What were their bases?

We'll see before long. I mean, would you trust Barth to beat Allen for instance?

Base Allen with iron weapons? Yes. Yes I would. Wendy's another story, but Barth's one saving grace is his great base defense.

Ah, so the camps must have great ratings on the rooms but room service must be an utter pain and the spa a nightmare on your back.

You come out a new man. Literally.

Considering how Dagon was acting, I'm surprised Ernst has the guts to just not bother.

You'll understand when you see his stats (I mean, you already know them, but still, I wanna talk about that shit).

I assume he'd tell whoever did order him to help Pavlov to back out.

Or he just laughed and said "fuck Pavlov!".

Mintz: such an irrelevant scamp that nobody would care if he deserted.

Which is all the better for him.

 

On 7/1/2019 at 3:06 AM, Hawkwing said:

Apparently I avoided double-posting. What do you know?

Anyway, since I'm in this odd situation, I may as well go over some stuff that I missed in the last update:

Oh. So he was a good guy...

Holmes's father, to be precise.

...Wait, Canaanite? We're fighting the Canaanites? The land of Canaan, the Promised Land of Israel?

...Did Kaga just make another biblical reference?

The name of Canaan has been established for a while.

The games words say one thing, it's actions speak another.

For some reason, this reminds me of how in Gaiden, most of the female characters have to be rescued, but once they're on the battlefield, they kick butt.

Not quite the same thing, frankly. In Gaiden half the women were either possesed or captured. Here some very obvious assholes are saying sexist things because they're assholes. I don't believe the two things are comparable.

Interesting way of ensuring the player doesn't get screwed over for accidental window-shopping, yet it still encourages them not to waste their resources once they actually buy something.

Indeed.

Nice! Time to burn our opponents to a crisp!

...Although then we'll be remembered of poor Seamus's sacrifice everytime we use it...

I'll be sure to get some kills in his name.

Considering that Two-Face from The Dark Knight originally had realistic burns, but that caused the test audiences to get nauseous, you made a wise decision.

Ouch. Sounds painful to watch.

Image result for mustafa spare my men

..Hard to do on the higher difficulties when you need the experience...

Yeah... that's gameplay/story segregation at its finest.

A female Gharnef. That's a new one.

...Steal from Kaga, IS! Although then they'd try and maker her "sympathetic" or what not.

Actually, it's not a new one, if you count Sonia from FE7... who's, incidentally, an extremely obvious rip-off of the one that Eugen mentioned there.

Three of them. That's a new one.

Except one of them was Seamus'd alongside Gramud.

Ah, so it was a spelling error.

... Part of me wants to change the meme I made, but it got such a great laugh out of us, I think I'll keep it for the memories.

The mighty dragon Mouse.

Cult killing! Despite it being one of the less interesting parts about Fire Emblem, it always has to appear, for some reason.

Eh, it's handled all right in this one, I feel.

Dang, that's same as the Dracoshield in Gaiden/Echoes. Of course, they can't break in those games, but you can still get a use out of the Steel Shield in this game.

It may only be 3 uses, but if I use them wisely...

Seems like a reasonable way to keep them in the story without having them impact gameplay too much.

I'm glad you guys approve of it.

I suppose that is one of the "downsides" you mentioned earlier.

And another downside Narcus brings.

Something tells me this either screws the player over a lot or a little depending on their finances at the moment.

It's more of a "if you don't know it's coming, you're fucked" situation.

Lego Fire Emblem. Why isn't that a thing yet?

Because Lego games are about movies, I guess...?

That... is a very strange mixture of things.

I don't know if I want to know what was going through the artists head when he was designed...

Maybe he wanted to do Waluigi justice.

They're definitely slimy and I want you to get creative with their death portraits.

I'll try!

Maybe he's hoping he can use the "[Rebel name]? Haven't seen her" excuse. Or that Pavlov will keep her alive but "silent" until it's safe to realease/be rid of her.

A terrible plan all the same.

Again, kill him creatively. And maybe watch gameplay of Mortal Kombat over the next few days to get some ideas.

Hwahahahahah... man, I don't think my limited artistic skills will be able to satisfy you, but I'll try.

Have you ever seen someone when they're angry and attacking someone? How they often have to be pulled back to stop hurting the other person? Pavlov probably entered that state.

For no reason at all. So what, did she spit on his perfect moustache or something?

Excellent question. Go far enough to get a few warning points when you kill him. Please.

Jeez! You want the death of me?

His forehead is large, but nice facial hair. He looks like a noble rogue.

That's a decent description of the man.

Heheheh. It's a simple joke, but a laugh was needed after what events just occurred.

I guess so.

I'm interested in seeing what this "favorite scene" is...

Seems like this guy will be an entertaining character.

He will be.

Image result for mint candy

I had to

Oh, you...

That... will end well...

Oh. Well in that case, it should end better than I originally thought it would.

What even did you have in mind?

I'm curious what this "neutrality" is comparable to in real life. After all, some countries in WW2 stayed neutral because they had little to contribute to the war, while Spain and Portugal had finished with a Civil war and were in no condition to fight, but still secretly supported the Axis. Switzerland would have been for the Allies, but remained neutral because that would have been begin to be massacred, and Sweden was a save haven for escaping Jews.

Well, I can't talk about any of the others, but Spain's "neutrality" was only due to Francisco Franco realizing that he stood no chance against the Allies, so he just kept a low profile, pretended he was good, things like that. And it worked, nobody gave a flying shit about him and thus he stayed in power until he died of natural causes in 1975. We had fascism until 1975. And now his body rests in the same place where a lot of his victims are buried, the Valley of the Fallen. The left want to move him, the right want him to stay there, and so one of the most pushing national issues (according to the higher ups) involves the location of a bunch of bones.

There are few where he doesn't.

The ones where he doesn't appear, right?

F*ck

You're asking to get your butt kicked and your bones broken by her, aren't you?

That's what she's doing, but Sharon's not so easily angered.

it's the thought that counts. And they don't know that.

I guess so.

You got that right.

Didn't I?

With hope, it will not.

Yeah..

At first glance, I would have asked why he was wearing a pot on his head, but I take that thought back. He looks like trouble.

You noticed the hat before you noticed the rapist face?

Oh no...

Oh... no... no...

Let me find and prepare some Mortal Kombat gifs...

Yeah, believe me, it's not going to be pretty. I hope you don't think too badly of me after today...

Great! Lets see how this plays out...

That... is black humor at it's finest.

It's also the kind of black humor were I barely restrain from punching the person in the face.

Hoo, boy... if that makes you want to punch me in the face, given what happens today, I sure am glad you don't know where I live.

Gameplay and story integration: Awesome when it leads to moments like these.

Indeed.

They do have a great dynamic. Hope that this isn't their only interaction.

Well... we'll see.

I can see why this is  your your favorite scene in the game.

It's just great in every way.

Now for next time...

l5yEq1.gif

Give some characters hell.

I will!

 

On 7/1/2019 at 4:07 AM, Ruminant said:

I don't normally like doing spelling corrections because to be honest I don't think spelling is that important unless mistakes cause errors in communication, but since English is your second language and this is evidently a new word to you regardless, it's spelled "ersatz".

Ah, all right. Thanks for the heads-up.

Yeah, I agree with you here (for one thing, Fire Emblem would be really boring if your units were too similar to each other). My comments that might have suggested otherwise are mostly out of frustration at how, to get more specific, Fir, Marisa, and Mia are worse in every way that matters compared to Rutger, Joshua, and Zihark (although, Fir isn't obnoxiously edgelordy the way Rutger is, to be fair), and then there's Karla who might be the worst unit in the entire series accounting for recruitment cost.

Fir's better than Rutger if only because her personality doesn't suck. I cannot argue the rest, though.

Isn't this literally how Nergal got control of the Black Fang in FE7?

Now I'm starting to see why people say that game is a ripoff of this one.

Heh. You ain't seen nothing yet.

Just want to say that this entire scene is hilarious. Eugen and Albertus just having a go at each other is great, if obviously ill-advised given they're supposed to be in an alliance. I particularly like how mad Eugen gets at being called "Grumpy Grandpa."

I thought it was pretty in-character for both of 'em, especially considering Eugen was having a bad day to begin with.

Fortunately, Runan's here to be reasonable and prevent any of that from having lasting consequences. Since Matthis's troops basically did the job of a rearguard last battle anyway, it makes sense to put them there, in addition to working as a lasting story justification for why we won't see them in gameplay. (Maybe I'm making too big a deal of that last bit, given that you have off-screen armies in most Fire Emblem games anyway... either way, it's a nice detail)

Thanks for the support.

What did Waluigi ever do to deserve this insult?

Being irrelevant.

I read this line with complete seriousness at first and was about to make some sort of self-deprecating joke about it like "Ernst is the most relatable character in this game" but then I read it again and realized it's supposed to be mostly sarcastic

anyway, Mintz is the most relatable character in this game

These two are amazing, in my opinion.

 

On 7/1/2019 at 5:32 AM, BrightBow said:

Not sure how to really talk about this considering the whole No Spoiler thing and given the size of the game it will probably take months until we actually get to that part. But let's just say, he really is as petty and spiteful as he presents himself.

I looked it up. No comment, but... yeah.

 

On 7/1/2019 at 12:52 PM, Mad-manakete said:

In my case, what really bugged me was these were people who have always said about how apolitical they are and mocked me for bothering to vote in our own Country's elections "because all politicians are corrupt so it's the same result" (while there's truth to it, the fact they can say it on their election then 180 on another country's is ridiculous). What do you call it when someone is hypocritical enough to care about another country's elections more than their own? I mean unless they live in North Korea or somewhere with a rigged vote. That's different.

Well, I mean, I don't have any faith in neither other countries' elections nor my own, so I guess I at least am not a hypocrite.

My location of course is a subtle nod based off the fact I've joked about the Archanean continent being Eurasia, with Talys being Japan. Ergo there's a few places a smaller landmass to the South of the Asian region could be.

Mmm I understand.

I maintain, there's a handful of maps I like in Gaiden (The Great Gate, Rigel and Zofia Castles, the final battle with Duma, the ship maps, Greith's citadel, Mila's temple, and Nuibaba's abode). Each of these maps have one thing in common. Namely they're not a flat field and work best with a plan. Ironically, the replayability issue hasn't bugged me much on Gaiden either. Each time I play through, I come up with some rule or other. Whether it's "all villagers are mercenaries/archers/mages/soldiers" or "Alm/Celica are the only ones allowed to kill a boss", it works. That said, the fact it's a spiritual successor to Gaiden we have here is certainly a draw, and it really makes me regret my computer is on the verge of it's demise.

A shame about that, this game kicks plenty of ass.

Funny enough, I have an old Sgt Fury (as in Nick Fury, the white one, not hus black son Marvel replaced him with to make him look like his actor in 2012) issue set in the bygone days of WWII (after all, this issue was from the early 1970s), where J. Jonah Jameson was editor of the Daily Bugle even back in the war, and sent a reporter as a war correspondent with Nick Fury and His Howling commandoes because said reporter kept trying to fake news on the war (that is he'd make up articles and try to get them past Jameson despite the fact he was faking it). Funny lesson there. Even Jameson didn't like fake reports. Unless they were on vigilantes, which clouded his judgement because of how his first wife, Joan, happened to die

JJJ as a character has a lot of depth.

While the poorly made card was my handiwork, it was made for an online joke rather than actually being sent on valentines day. So unless someone else sent it after seeing it, I'm innocent... as yet.

"Yet".

Just gonna leave this here
Oe6p9H6.png

I don't know what is the most hilarious part agbout this: EUgen's face just plastered in the middle of the God-beard, or the very existance of this thing.

...pfffft... "Hitler cruficied my son!!"... hwahahah... and Jesus looks like Hulk Hogan...!

Amazing. Two replies to one statement. It's because you had to rub in I missed a Lee pun.
Actually, I lost my internet connection while first typing down all the replies, and when I later reloaded the site, I thought I'd lost all the progress, so I just did it again. Guess they were just hidden.

Smells like brimstone. Elfire and Brimstone. Maybe she'd like a nice Valentines day card?

Not likely.

Slim build, Waluigi moustache, hair dyed (I maintain) purple. Obviously someone worked out it was easier to get into Smash Bros as a Fire Emblem Character these days.

Pavlov for smash. He fires lasers out of his forehead cross.

Burning at the stake? Must resist urge to Frollo-post.

Well, Pavlov looks like Frollo if Frollo existed in the Hunger Games universe.

Read this as "spamming match". Imagined them playing brawl as Meta-Knight.

Worse: Bayonetta in Sm4sh.

 

On 8/1/2019 at 3:30 AM, Franp3 said:

You're goddamn right.

Of course I am.

That explains why my luck with gacha games is awful, i've been accidentally giving it away all this time! Cries in Grand Order

Hah. How does it feel to get a taste of your own medicine?

I have, actually. Who do you take me for?

The guy who randomly disappears?

Oh hi Barth. How's your... brick life?

Not Barth, old Dolph.

waluigi.jpg.a1de2def733cd7b6178c11fd715ace47.jpg

I already made that joke, thanks.

General Ernst? Wrong pseudo-FE strategy game, mate.

A lot of pseudo-FEs seem to be fond of the name Ernst, actually. Personally, I always found it funny how the name has exactly one vowel. "Ernesto" doesn't look so bad, frankly.

Black Knight? How many does that make, like twenty?

On 8/1/2019 at 8:35 AM, BrightBow said:

You mean groups or individual members of said groups? Because I think it's two groups, assuming Ernst leads one of them. If he does not though, I'm not sure how Mintz could be a Black Knight.

Well... he's just Mintz, he doesn't seem to belong to any groups. He's only here because Ernst's a friend of his, really. If it wasn't for him and Leonie, I bet he would've gotten the hell outta dodge before we even got to Senay.

whatsanairportagain.png.e373ed88113ce11404ce2b0cedb358e7.png...What's an airport, again?

Same Energy.

How dare you insult Mintz like so?

No shit. Remember that the Japanese can't differentiate an R from an L. In the old translation se was called Lenny!

Pfffffhahahahahahah!

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Is it just me, or is Eugen way more aggresive today than usual?

He just really, really hates opportunistic, Empire-sympathizing Legomen.

Gasp! Could this be character development?

Eugen doesn't need to develop, he's already at the "best character" stage.

Not on my watch!

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What use is there for a watch that just tells you who is going to die on my LPs?

 

Update:

Spoiler

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This chapter. This is a pretty interesting chapter.

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But first, some inventory management. Runan grabs the levin sword, Raffin grabs a shitty sword, Lee takes Dagon's hellfire and Meriel, Lee's fire tome.

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There we go. The map screen lied, there are not two but three teams here: Senay's mercenaries, Ernst's 15th corps and Pavlov's personal troops. Ernst's army is definitely the mightiest, but the mercenaries can put up a fight as well. Pavlov's guys are experience and walking event flags. More on that later. Notice the detail that there's no boss. Once again, more on that later.

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These two are obviously recruitable. Raffin needs to talk to Sharon, and then she has to speak with Billford, but even if he's dead/not with Runan, they'll join after the battle if they live.

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The mercenaries aren't that great statwise, but they have some heavy weaponery. There's this, then the Sellsword has a swordbreaker, and the Myrmidon to the south has a killing edge. Best be careful about all that.

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The 15th corpsmen are a lot more powerful, with Great Knights, Paladins, Cavaliers galore and this guy. Mage Knights exist in this game! Except they're a very rare enemy-only class. Personally, I think Maruj should've promoted to this. Given how he's the weakest of the mages, it would've given him a unique niche, but nope.

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Mintz is here as well, and at first glance he looks just like a better Roger that comes later. Well, more or less, he is, but the main difference is his skillset. He has Wrath and... Flurry. Flurry might just be the single best skill in this game. You know that troll skill in the FE5 that made you get shot by ballistae 5 times instead of once? Well, Flurry's that, except it's manually controlled. If the unit's speed surpasses the enemy's, you just press "flurry" and you'll get up to 5 rounds of combat. Add to that the fact that Mintz can use the pilum at base, and you got a really solid unit.

The drawback? Recruiting him's rather awkward. You'll see why later.

Now, the game really wants me to avoid the grasslands, but I'm sure we could take those enemies on. Surely they can't be so strong? Let's check Ernst's stats.

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...

Yeah... ladies and gentlemen, I introduce you to Ernst. Look at that. He's so good, I don't even know where to start. He's literally invincible and can one-round everybody, so let's avoid him for now. I don't think even a boatload of crits could get through him, especially considering he's got a +20 defense shield. 2 uses may seem like very little, but on top of 20 AS that's effectively two rounds of combat where we could do absolutely nothing to him. So yeah, extremely blatant roadblock.

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Because Ernst exists, we're going to break our word to the mayor and head towards Fort Senay through the town. That's Billford's range I've marked, and the tile in front of Runan is the range of the swordbreaker. Let's try to avoid both for now.

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As soon as we move into the city, Billford and Sharon say some words.

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And--

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...

So much for "this should be easy", huh? As soon as you caught sight of Norton, you went into a panic and left. Lovely. I love this game so much.

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This guy is a lot braver than Sharon, and even takes some time to do the Runan dance while stabbing Norton for minimal damage!

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He even survived a round against Norton! Impressive!

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This guy did, too. Quality troops you got there, Lego mayor. I mean, named characters aside.

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Doesn't look too shabby.

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Okay, strategy time. Sasha takes down the brave lance man, while Raquel and Kate do the same with the swordbreaker person. I still can't get over the fact that the swordbreaker's bright blue.

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Meriel finishes off the Knight who got shredded by Norton.

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Urgh... why can't you talk to Billford, Raffin? Do you not like him?

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That's Bill's range. I don't trust him not to attack Raffin because AI, so he'll just stay there with his compatriot and Kate.

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Looks like a plan! In retrospect this was extremely dumb, getting hit so much would destroy Billford's shield and I risked critical hits from Norton on top of that, but it doesn't really matter at this point.

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I was hoping for Kate to come back, but nope, she's still too scared to approach us. That's fine, Raffin outruns her.

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Dramatic.

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Of course! He has the tiniest chance of getting a crit and he nails it! Only when it's bad for me, only then my units get crit! At least it wasn't a double crit.

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You failed!

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Let's pay a visit to the inn. Perhaps Norton will be able to do something about those really shady people.

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Suuuuuuuuuuuure... well, guess I'll just have to find a woman to in there.

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But first, I'm pretty sure this'll keep Billford from moving.

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OH SHIT SASHA!

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Crisis averted. Phew...

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Runan hands over the steel shield to the convoy (represented by Eugen in shops, so I guess he's our merchant?). Wouldn't want to waste Seamus's last gift stupidly.

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This is Runan's levin sword animation. Pretty good.

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Hmmm... I don't want to risk that because of that pesky killing edge Myrmidon. Runan can take a crit, anyways. Let's just give it a turn.

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You know him, you idiot!

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The Matthis syndrome is strong with this one.

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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH WRAAAAAAAAAAAATH! I FORGOT ABOUT WRATH! NORTON, DAMN YOU FOR HITTING HIM CRITICALLY!!

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Jesus fuck, blistering barnacles, that was too scary. Haah... huuh... puff...

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Ah-ha! You bitch, you couldn't crit the Runan! Luck is on my side today!

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BRRYAAAAGH! Blistering fucking barnacles, he got doubled! How, how did he get doubled? He has 10 speed!

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Oh, c'mon! Don't tell me that's our first reset... it can't be, right? His hitrate's pathetic!

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Fuck me, of course, I almost forgot. I can't have things going my way for too long, or else the universe dies or something.

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And I was so proud of my perfect score thus far...

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Eugen, he's fucking dead. That guy bludgeoned his brains to mush with the sharp-looking hammer. Are you just talking to the corpse now?

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Oh, never mind, I guess Eugen has the power to bring people back to life, because we don't even get a game over screen, just the choice to try again or go back to the title.

Eugen, man. He's the hero we need, but not the hero we deserve. He's too good for us to deserve him.

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Very well, then, let's try again.

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This time, I leave Kate within Billford and Sharon's range. With any luck, they won't do the absolute opposite of what they should do in order to survive and reunite with Raffin, like last time. As well, I have Runan open this bag of cash. Sweet, nearly the maximum amount we could've gotten! That'll come in handy later.

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Lee takes the steel shield in case Sharon decides to attack Runan, and that's it.

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Yeah, yeah, we know.

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Blah blah, get on with it, will ya?

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Good. All I need to do now is get Norton and the brave lance guy out of the way, and it's recruiting time.

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Just like so.

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l9X3N1M.pngRaffin...! I never would've thought we'd meet again in a situation like this.

J3ntLLJ.pngThe last I saw you was back in Canaan. I'm glad to see you are well.

l9X3N1M.pngIt's been five years since then... since the day you promised me.

J3ntLLJ.pngSharon, I... I'm sorry I didn't come back. But for a fugitive like me, it was too dangerous to stay in the Empire. When I was fleeing to Wellt, I barely even made it across Reeve River. But I really did want...

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0zFk3fj.png Someone's in a bad mood. Is it because of your highly embarrassing performance before Runan died and Eugen resuscitated him?

l9X3N1M.pngI believed in you, Raffin! I waited for you! But you never came back for me. I was so grieved that I even cut off my hair! I hated you so much, I started wishing you would come back just so I could kill you!

J3ntLLJ.pngSharon...

0zFk3fj.png I suppose that explains her firing a shot at him before he could talk to her.

l9X3N1M.pngPhew... I'm glad that's off my chest. Look, it's all in the past now. There's no time to be dwelling on old wounds when there's a war going on.

J3ntLLJ.pngYou're right. We should just be glad that we were able to see each other again. Say, Sharon, why don't we get a drink and catch up after this battle?

l9X3N1M.pngI'd like that. Let your leader know I'm joining your army. The other mercenaries probably won't be very happy about that, but such is life.

 

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HP 55% - Strength 25% - Skill 35% - Speed 45% - Defense 20% - Magic 10% - Luck 25% - Mastery 35%

Sharon's Kate with ever-so-slighly better bases, Flurry at level 15 and Canto way too late, without Kate's nearly perfect availability. Frankly, I've never bothered. The time I tried, she died. I guess she could work since she has a mutual support with Raffin, but I'm not using Raffin (shocking, I know), while Kate has plenty of people she supports and is supported by, so... yeah. I don't think I'll use Sharon.

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Right. Let's try to make sure our protagonist survives this time around. Wouldn't want Eugen to get mad at me for forcing him to use his powers too much.

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Absolutely awesome. I'm glad I got this as a reward for being throughoutly incompetent. Keep this up, Runan.

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More recruitment. Did you see that? Billford had a personality for a second there!

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HP 90% - Strength 35% - Skill 30% - Speed 35% - Defense 30% - Magic 5% - Luck 35% - Mastery 20% - Movement 5%

Billford's a meme, I believe? At least he seemed to be in that TRS tier list Reddit made a while ago. This guy starts with 100 sword kills for no reason, which effectively gives him 10% hit and crit forever. He also has a movement growth for no reason, which means that, on average, at level 48 promoted he'll have as much movement as Norton (friendly reminder that the absolute highest level you can be in this game is 40). He also learns Flurry at level 38 for no reason, Adept at 31 for no reason and Nihil at 26 for no reason, none of which are as useful as Norton's horse and Urbanite for indoor maps. He's got balanced growths, which are admittedly better than Norton's, but Norton's superior availability (more to the point, coming before the zombie chapter) granted him a fair chance to easily get to level 10 before the route split and gain a horse in time for the more fast-paced chapters. Billford? Billford comes right before a chapter that requires one to run fast as heck, and the map after that one takes place in the forest, where he moves one tile per turn. Also, his bases aren't that great. They're not bad by any means, but they aren't what I'd call stellar.

All in all, Billford feels like a joke unit. He's not that obvious of a joke character at first glance, but when you examine him in more detail, it becomes increasingly evident that he is. I used him once, and it was okay enough, but I find Norton to be way more fun to use.

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In any case! It's time to destroy the remaining mercenaries. I'm sure old Dolph won't mind too much.

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The killing edge Myrmidon's still far away enough that he can't reach anybody. Let's see to it that he's the last man standing by the time he does make it to us.

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Fighting.

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Jeiganing.

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Sigh... failing. I was trying to wear this Knight down for Sharon, but...

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I'd like to give her one level, at least, but she clearly only wants to sit on the bench.

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Fine, then. I don't want this guy to roam freely, therefore...

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This divine lightleeng shall pierce the skies!

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Okay, since the inn event cannot be triggered by men (even one as beautiful as Norton), maybe Sharon could do it?

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No? How picky. 'Kay, then, innocent-looking women. I don't know about you, but I'm liking this less and less by the minute.

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Sasha is attacked by the Myrmidon, but she can take 26 damage.

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She has enough speed to trigger Vantage, but not enough to double.

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Mintz hasn't moved from Ernst's side, by the way. He will now, however. Here's where the awkward part of his recruitment comes into play. You'd think you just talk to him with Runan or something, right? Well, no. He'll be making a beeline for Pavlov's keep. If he makes it there before turn 10, he'll enter the fort and upon seizing, he'll be recruited. However, you can also save Leonie sooner than that by approaching the fort, which forces Pavlov to come out. If this happens, Leonie will be recruited at the end of the chapter. The problem? This makes Mintz leave the battlefield, never to be seen again. I've read somewhere that if you aggro Pavlov before turn 4 Mintz is recruitable later, but it sounds strange, I've never seen that anywhere else and I personally think it's a hoax. I don't know for sure, but I don't think it is true.

This isn't a problem if you're a filthy casual like me, but I can see it being an issue for LTC pros, as Mintz is a unit that actively punishes efficiency. What, you're fast enough to make it to the fort in less than 10 turns? Fuck you, then, you don't get the great prepromoted Paladin.

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Thankfully, I'm a filthy casual, so I can just fuck around and check out what happens if I send Enteh to the Totally Not A Trap Pub.

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Are you serious? Who's less threatening than Enteh!?

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...oh...

...ergh... okay, so. You know the old saying, "don't shoot the messanger"? Well, allow me to remind you, I'm only the messanger here. I am in no way affiliated to the development of this game, nor did I have any involvement in the making of this decision. Also, this is only fiction. These are only pixels. I am not about to ruin a real little girl's life for the sake of an event. Oh, on that note, let me tell you something: this is the useful thing to do, gameplaywise. You gain something really good if you do this.

...I'm so sorry. If you're wondering, my adress is 123 Fake Street. But please don't lynch me. Lynch Kaga, if you will.

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Now, give Runan your things, Plum. Oh, no reason, I just feel like, before long, you'll no longer need that heal staff .

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Some fighting, to draw away attention from what I am about to do.

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Crap level, Meriel. You want me to send you to keep Plum company in the Very Trustable Inn?

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Mintz runs south.

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Aaahhh... fuck, please tell me she looks too dangerous.

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Shit, actual dialogue...

fcJEJ9A.pngAh, yes... I got separated from my companions, and don't know where to go...

0zFk3fj.png You got "separated"? I sent you here! I guess the in-universe explanation is that Runan ordered you to come he--

IfRBMws.png Oh, for fucks sake, Runan! Don't try to hide it, I saw you smiling for a second there! C'mere, you little...!

fcJEJ9A.pngCan you help me?

orfi8jp.pngOf course, dearie! Here, have a glass of milk, on the house.

0zFk3fj.png You're not even trying... there's no way she's going to fall for that.

fcJEJ9A.pngReally? Thank you very much! Mmm... It's delicious. Thank you, ma'am.

0zFk3fj.png ...

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fcJEJ9A.pngAah! Who are you?

orfi8jp.pngAh, you don't need to worry about him. He's a regular here. Despite how he looks, he's a very nice man.

0zFk3fj.png You know, what really scares me is that he looks a lot like me in real life. I don't go around with a rape face, but I do have the neckbeard, the round face, the tiny moustache, the beanie I wear when it's really cold and I have to go outside, the green coat... although, mine is a darker green and actually a bomber coat (not one of those with all the fur every single guy my age wears, though, I'm not what most people would call "hip"), and my beanie's gray and doesn't look like a pot... my point is, I really don't like the fact that I look like that, even if it's only slightly so.

fcJEJ9A.pngAh, I'm sorry. Forgive me for yelling.

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0zFk3fj.png Could you please refrain from telling them personal details like that in the future? Thanks.

XaQD3CQ.pngHmm... Your mother must've been a very beautiful woman...

IfRBMws.png He's a terrible actor! He's the most obvious rapist I've seen in my entire life! Plum, there's no way you can be falling for that!

fcJEJ9A.pngYes, she was... She was a dancer in her youth, so she had a nice figure. I hope I look like her when I get older.

IfRBMws.png You... you imbecile! Don't tell him that!

XaQD3CQ.pngOho, a dancer? How about you, young lady? Can you dance?

fcJEJ9A.pngYes, my mother taught me a little. I dance by myself every now and then, but never in front of anyone.

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IfRBMws.png I... what? Do you even have a survival instinct?!

XaQD3CQ.pngOh, such a waste... Why even dance at all if no one's watching? How about you come along with me? I can teach you to dance real good.

fcJEJ9A.pngWhat!? No way! There's no way I'm going to dance in front of other people! I-I'm leaving!

IfRBMws.png About time!

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IfRBMws.png Piece of shit! And you were complaining about Pavlov, you guys! Pavlov's fucking Gandhi compared to this fucker!

XaQD3CQ.pngI owe you one, Ma'am. Here's a little extra for you.

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IfRBMws.png "A-As always"?! Why, you... you... despicable...! Everyone, forget about Pavlov! We're burning this accursed place to the ground and then some!

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Oh. They locked the door. Nice. And nobody's going to question the fact that we just lost a Cleric. Nice. Friggin' A. I just sent a little girl to God knows what sort of hellhole, and that's the correct thing to do, because it's the only way to get a dancer in this goddamned game!

In all seriousness... before anyone asks, yes, I can and will rescue her. And no, I wasn't joking: the only way to get a true dancer in this game is by having Plum be kidnapped by that human scum. Joy. Absolute joy.

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Let's... let's move on, shall we? There's another house that's open to visitors in this shitty town. I wonder what'll happen next? Maybe they'll hold a knife to Sasha's throat and I'll have to pay 10000 gold to set her free?

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hTMofYU.png Hahahahahahahah! This reminds me of that part in Papers, Please where some idiot hands over two different passports... ah, but I digress.

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orfi8jp.pngIf someone with potential uses one to call a wyvern, they might just get to ride one themselves! Ain't it a marvel? Just for you, it's 10,000 gold. What do you say? You want it, right?

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0zFk3fj.png Well, fuck you very much, I'll get money and come back. That thing is the only sure-fire Pegasus promotion until around chapter 34. I'll get it one way or another.

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Mintz is still riding towards the fort. He's almost there now.

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Here we go. With the hammer and the herb, we've gotten enough money to buy the flute. See, this is actually a really shitty dick move, because, as you may remember, Narcus just made off with half our cash. If you didn't know that was coming, you'd be fucked, because you wouldn't have enough cash to buy the flute and then your Pegasus couldn't promote until almost the end of the game. Fortunately, I already knew Narcus would do that, a fact I demonstrated by opening almost every single money bag I got instead of saving them up for after Narcus's escape.

Man, Kaga was feeling quite hateful when he made this chapter, wasn't he? First there's Mintz screwing over efficient players, then there's the whole ordeal at the bar, now this... whew. Who hurt you that day, man?

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I could tell him I don't need it, but all he does is tell me I'll "regret it later", which I did, so I inmediately went back in and accepted his offer.

orfi8jp.pngOoh, is that so? You got sharp eyes there. Here, take it with you!

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Excellent, damnit! Something good out of this shitshow of a chapter!

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Since I don't think I have before, let me show you a nice little thing: in the support menu, aside from the supports, you can check if the unit can promote, to what class, and with what item. Handy.

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Very well, with that done, it's time to start marching towards Fort Senay.

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We're getting there, but it seems someone's beat us to the punch!

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WbLEWVn.pngHe said he was going to have her burnt at the stake... I didn't want to see it, so I stayed here...

twhnfrc.pngPavlov...! If you lay a finger on her, I'll kill you!

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Looks like he's got it covered, but even so! Go to his aid, Norton!

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Wait, what...? Pretty sure this isn't the scene that's supposed to play now... oh! I know what this is! Rewind, rewind, quick!

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Phew... that was close. Let me explain what just happened: between Mintz reaching the fort and Mintz saving Leonie, a turn goes by. If you enter the Pavlov triggering area in that lapse of time, the game glitches out and pretends Mintz didn't make it. However, since he has already entered the fort, he can't leave the map and vanish forever. The result of this is a glitch where Leonie and Mintz are both recruited at the end of this map. This isn't as beneficial as it may sound like: Leonie is recruited in the next map if she's saved by Mintz anyway, and doing this glitch fucks up their endings rather badly. I'm sure it'd be hilarious to see, but I think I'd rather get to watch the scene where Mintz rescues Leonie, it's another great scene starring him. Please forgive me for the rewinding.

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I'm pretty sure this guy's attack range is what decides whether or not Pavlov comes out of the fort. Might be the Axe Soldier, but it doesn't really matter, as the solution is the same: don't walk past the brook.

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Like so.

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Perfect, that's the one we're looking for.

soiQK3r.pngBeing burnt alive must be oh so painful... But if you beg for forgiveness, I might just release you. I could use a cute little girl like you among my... other ladies.

IfRBMws.png Dude, I just said that you're a saint compared to the bar's crooks! Did you hear me and took it as a personal challenge? Damn! I can't even tell who's worse anymore, the serial rapists or the serial rapist!

i2FbJok.pngYou pig! If you're going to do it, get on with it! You don't frighten me!

soiQK3r.pngYou... You spit on me again!

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IfRBMws.png Oh, I can't believe it...! Even the likes of Frollo at least had the decency to light some wood on fire around their victim! This guy isn't going to burn her, he's going to roast her like a friggin' porkchop! Blimey, damnit! Blimey!

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hTMofYU.png Mintz! Save the day, my man!

soiQK3r.pngW-Who the hell are you!? Aaughh! P-Please stop! Don't kill me!

twhnfrc.pngIf you don't want to die, then you'll let that girl free.

soiQK3r.pngA-All right, I get it... Guards... free the girl...

0zFk3fj.png Mintz, just kill his ass. I doubt any of his men are loyal enougy to seek vengeance after he kicks the bucket.

twhnfrc.pngLeonie, come here.

i2FbJok.pngMintz! You really came!

twhnfrc.pngOf course. I keep my promises. I'll take care of these buffoons. You just get away from here. And don't get caught again!

i2FbJok.pngBut...

twhnfrc.pngDo it! Now!

i2FbJok.pngR-Right...

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twhnfrc.pngSo, Lord Pavlov... Just sit tight for a little bit. As soon as she's far enough away, I'll let you go. Probably.

xQunKTk.png "Probably"? Pffft. You're so awesome, Mintz.

soiQK3r.pngBastard... You won't get away with this!

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Leonie exits the fort and flees north. We won't be seeing her again today.

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soiQK3r.pngYou traitor scum...! Once I'm through with you, you'll be begging for the sweet embrace of death! You there, throw this traitor in the dungeon!

YuCbALi.pngOf course, Lord Pavlov.

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soiQK3r.pngWhat!? How did they...? Those tricky little rats... I'll have to exterminate them myself!

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There's the shitbag, rearing his ugly mug at last. Unlike the criminals at the pub, I can behead this fucker, something I will take great pleasure on doing.

cFZbGg0.pngiJM01HU.png

Chaaarge! His men are attempting to defend their leader, but they've left the right flank unprotected. However, I think I'd rather hack 'n slash through them all. Just so Pavlov can take a moment to understand what is about to happen to him.

UYBdeZp.pngqITTYvz.pngJoOZ1M9.png

One down.

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Uh... one down!

6xdN3jw.pngoQN7LNn.pngM58yZak.png

Oh, so the flashbangs aren't exclusive to Meriel! This is really strange, because I never notice these frames while playing, whereas I did notice the FE6 flashbangs. I suppose they're just much faster than they were in FE6.

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Eh, whatever. THese guys are trying, at least, but they aren't very good at their jobs.

ZXEmmdc.pngZ7Qmnd1.pngSEHli5l.png

See, Norton could have more defense, but since he isn't quite completely invincible, the enemies still like to attack him. And then they die because Norton is amazing.

UDjyvYW.png1qnMMob.png

Before long, only a couple of enemies remain standing.

iCZ8gE8.pngQlbJaN8.pngVB307QL.png

Not for long, though!

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We're close enough. Let us take a look at what Pavlov can do.

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Remember what I said about bosses being only as strong as their character'd reasonably be? Pavlov has an expensive weapon, but he can barely lift it and is otherwise pitiful. Very fitting.

XN88OfJ.png6y1c9Wz.pngXgdPrkQ.png

Sharon gets a kill because I feel like giving her one level.

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Kate doesn't kill him in one round, which is good. Let's toy with him a little.

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Nobody cares about you, Pavlov. He said so himself.

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I like the Duke sprite. Looks very regal, but not fit for combat. In other words, it servers its purpose.

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Also, he dodged. Sure, sure. You're only delaying the inevitable and extending your pain, Pavlov.

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What? Ernst, I thought nobody cared about Pavlov! That guy clearly does!

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I've had my fun. Now you're going down.

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Awesome! Great, great, absolutely amazing! Hahahahahah! Great strength, great mastery, great HP, only one defense point short of Mintz's defense... this is all really impressive, Kate, I'm truly glad I gave you a chance! I truly am!

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And now, for the finishing blow!

HjFX3mX.pngaZZTkS0.pngOGHPxfS.png

That will not help you.

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There! Right on the gut!

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Now the offscreen ladies are saved.

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You're so fast! It's rather nice to see.

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And we got his sword, too! Thanks for dying, Pavlov. Now kindly go get raped by devils in Hell or something.

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Well, it's over... isn't it?

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Naaahhh I'm gonna try to get a kill or two from Ernst's guys.

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But first, a leevel!

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Magic, great! I always like to see Lee getting magic. I tend to have magic-blessed Lees (both the one from my scrapped run and the one from my first finished run had very good magic), and considering he starts off with enough speed to avoid being doubled forever and even double a good amount of enemies consistently, magic is all I really want from him. The luck's good, too, wouldn't want a stray arrow to hit him critically.

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And we're off. Surely we could nab a couple kills before Ernst reacts, right?

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gAbVkav.pngThose fools! Don't they realize they are riding to their deaths?

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xQunKTk.png Ernst's leaving? Then there's no need to be afraid! We'll get them all!

gAbVkav.pngRetreat? In the face of battle? What could the prince be thinking...?

ZViYyv3.pngFrom a careful reading of the message, it seems that he cannot trust the other generals there, and that you were the only man he could turn to. You can read here for yourself, sir.

gAbVkav.pngIndeed, you're right... The prince must fear a rebellion by the Generals who have sided with the Cult. It seems things have gotten much worse during my absence.

0zFk3fj.png To think this scene is hidden behind an event flag that any sane person would never think to trigger...

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ZViYyv3.pngUnderstood, General! I won't fail you!

tW3v2wU.pngkYwwpsZ.png

And with that, Ernst's gone. His men ride forth to meet us.

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We retaliate, on cue.

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Strength alone is better than skill and luck both. I'm fine with this.

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Not this, though!

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The other Great Knight can reach Norton, but he only has an estoc. The Mage knight has elfire, but I'm sure Norton can take it.

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Let's heal him up, though, to be sure.

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Ah, crap!

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Phew...

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He even executed Pavise and didn't take those 2 damage points.

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I have to say, I like this guy's golden armor. Norton's all-black style's good too, but look at all the gold!

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Cute animations, my friend.

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But you suck.

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Sasha could do it, but I'd rather get the kill to someone else.

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So let's have Meriel kill this guy with her tiny stars. A waste, I know but I wanted him out of the way.

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Sasha Jeigans the man for Sharon, and Cantoes away.

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There goes one of this game's very few Mage Knights.

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Nice, Norton still can't die.

fE2Xw7w.pngsNZ7vs4.pngYYsLFcS.png

Mmph! I don't know what's more heartbreaking, all the crits or the fact that he's stealing all the experience for himself.

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Bunch o' fighting here. I panicked a little when this happened, but we're good, we're good.

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Norton can now reach this asshat, so I can check out how he fares against him. Hey, that's not half bad! Crit, I know, but so long as Sasha stays close to Norton that critical chance will stay at 0%.

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For now, let's do this.

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Meriel levels up, now that I could finally get her a kill with the fire tome. She would've died if she missed, but she still has the miracle charm, so it was a risk I was willing to take. She needs experience.

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Not bad at all. All things she needs. I like it.

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Sharon, too, levels up. Impress me like Kreiss did back in the day, woman, and I shall reward you.

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You had your chance. Off to the bench with you now.

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Ohh, 10 damage! Impressive! And worrisome...

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Not anymore. Skill is useless due to Wrath existing, but defense and HP? I'm perfectly okay with that.

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djQW24i.pngHmCVgyU.pngqiFT0Hk.png

All of my experience, noooooooooooo!

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Feck. Well, then. He'll get another level before today's over.

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C'mere, Bishop. It can only end one way, the question is "when"!

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Caught you! D'aww...

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Eh, at least he's now guaranteed to get a level once this guy dies.

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Caught you! D'ooohhh! Norton!

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Finally! He always seems to get critty after missing a couple times. Must be a sore loser.

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It's like Dougy on a horse. All the strength, all the defense, surprisingly serviceable speed, above-average movement... only there isn't a godly Warrior to do all that and more this time around, and I can give the boots to someone else. Say what you will, guys, but I'm sure Narron wouldn't have been nearly as good. Or entertaining! Hah!

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Time to go.

Well, we had some hiccups along the way, but overall, I'm happy with the way things turned out! Tune in next time for some plot, and even if you don't feel like it, that's all right, I still hope you fare well. Buh-bye!

Death count: --

Reset count: 1 (Runan: 1)

 

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16 Defense? That is one durable Norton. When I used him I felt he really was no more durable then other mounts on the same level while being far worse in everything else. So he was quite a letdown.

Dragon Flutes are definitely special from other promotion items. There are only enough to promote half of the Pegasus Knights in the game and they can't be sold, unlike other promotion items. And the other one isn't exactly easy to get either. Well, it is easy, but it's one of those things that depend on a specific character being on a specific route. So it's easy to miss unless you already know. So I think they definitely made them difficult to get on purpose. ...however, certain people do get to become Dragon Knights for free for whatever reason. So it's still pretty weird.
The good thing is that Pegasus Knights are still some of the best units around even without promotion.
Still, if Pegasus Knights being unpromoted is supposed to be expected, then they should be able to at least reach lv 30, like the classes that can't promote at all. Fortunately even unpromoted units can hit the level cap in this game, thanks to the Super Proof items. But it's still pretty annoying.

It really sucks to be a low level unit that joins on Runan's side after the first route split like Sharon. Because now the rest of the maps are spread across two different teams, so you have a lot less time to get experience... at least if you are on Runan's route. Holmes has a ton of EXP on his route until the second split. And after the second split, there isn't actually that much EXP on Holmes' route unless you purposefully grind. At least that was always my impression.

And Plum... yeah...
Not only is this the only way to get a dancer, it's also the only way to advance her subplot. *urgh*
I suppose I'm gonna hold back on this topic for now, until we come back to this guy. Because for now I wouldn't actually have too much of a problem with this. Well, besides the fact that the player has to be the one to pull the trigger here. And I actually like how this creeps partner in crime is this innocent looking old lady. Just a normal, everyday person only in it for the money.
But after this? It's gonna be awful. Really, really, really awful.
I suppose one thing I don't give Tellius enough credit is to heavily tone down this obligatory fantasy setting sexism. And not to have all those rapists everywhere. Kaga had been gone for a while by that point, but these things were still very present throughout the Elibe games.

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There's only enough room for one smart-mouthed woman on each route, and Sharon would've made number two.  Can't wait to see Esther back in action~!

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Fair warning ahead of time that anything spoilered in this reply will contain violent content.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

My classes have started again, so the updating will probably slow down a little. Also, Imgur was being dumb the other day, but that's not of any importance right now.

Ah. So that's why the update was a little slow. Thanks for the warning.

On 1/7/2019 at 9:30 PM, Franp3 said:

Damn, now I've got to look that game up.

The character artwork and animations are really good as well. When compared to their previous games, you can really see how the artists have improved.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

That you did.

Right when I started writing, the update came. Thought I could barely make it, but who knows? Maybe it was for the better.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I'm honored that you'd make an exception to watch me ramble.

Hey, I made a promise, and I intend to keep it this time.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

When it comes to FE7, you can just safely assume he did pretty much everything first. I'm not even kidding, that's the worst part.

I still need to play the older FE games. It isn't out of a lack of trying, mind you, but Nintendo isn't doing the best of jobs making them available. And as I mentioned before, my laptop hates emulators for some reason.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I understand. Maybe I should check out the higher difficulties then.

They shouldn't take to long to unlock, if memory serves me correctly.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Man, at this rate I'm gonna end up making the title so huge, it'll take an entire page.

At the moment, it's a pretty good size.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I don't know, I'm not the biggest fan of Sonic. Or the biggest player of Sonic. Or the biggest anything of Sonic.

I'm a more casual fan. I have one of the genesis collections and a few other games, and I do enjoy them, but otherwise it's not my favorite series or anything like that.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You have to unlock Batman with a fish in this game. Amazing.

The game is weird, and I love it for it. Even if it makes difficult to discuss the game with someone who's never played it before, to the point I've kind of given up on doing so.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ah, the videogames. I've only played one, myself, Revenge of the Sith for the DS. Pretty fun Beat 'Em Up, all things considered.

A lot of them are pretty damn good. Heck, Republic Command is my favorite shooter, the stories of the KOTOR games are awesome, the Jedi Knight series has awesome lightsaber combat, and it's fun to use the force in The Force Unleashed. Oh, and the Podracing game is actually really good. And so are are the X-Wing, TIE Fighter, and Starfighter series.

...Dang Star Wars has a lot of games.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ergh, well... some times, I guess.

"But Ruben, would you sacrifice those 'some times' for always being reassuring?"

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I just find the glasses to be a bit jarring. It's not like Etzel/Canas, who wear old-fashioned monocles, and they aren't the classic tiny, round spectacles either. Laurent and his mother's glasses are very modern-looking, and it bothers me a little.

Guess they had to make some improvement after being 1000 years after a previous game. Even if they excused still being in the middle ages with "Evil dragon destroyed the world so hard, civilization had to research everything again".

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You aren't helping the game's case, although to be fair, I don't mind it as much as some other people do.

Yeah, it's something that I think is less prevalent than people make it out to be, but it's still not hard to see where the complaint came from.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The way I see it, both sides make some good points and a fuck-load of bad ones, and both sides do lots of dumb shit that undermine the good points they do make. I dread the day I have to go vote (my parents are going to force me), because as far as I'm concerned, neither side's all that good. Does that make me a terrible person and a supporter of "the enemies"? I guess so, but I just can't, for the life of me, find a solid reason to vote one side over the other.

Honestly, it's hard to find anything positive to talk about politics. And I understand both sides of being reluctant to vote. I know people who hate Trump but still voted for him just because they didn't want the other side to win, and people who stained because both sides sucked.

Although in the area of gender (and race, for that matter), I just don't give a damn. Beneficial in interacting with people, but it's annoying as heck when people do realise that's the simplest and easiest solution to the problem.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I don't think so. He probably thinks he's great, and that's it.

He'd annoy the heck out of philosophers, then.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

That came out wrong, did it not?

Maybe. I'm not dirty minded in that area.

Violence, on the other hand...

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Sounds very much like a survival sandbox kinda game. With any luck, at least you don't punch trees in that one.

It's a roguelike post-apocalyptic survival game with no zombie, guns are rare and ammo rarer, and there are no nukes. It's a pretty good game. The crafting system is clever and open (as in, you can make a cast out of a stick and some rags, but you can also make one out of a crowbar, a dead squirrel, and a paper bag. You can also screw on binoculars to a gun to make a scope), the combat is pretty immersive depite being text based, and it manages to have grey morality moments that aren't at all scripted.

About my only complaint against it is that the few story-based areas are pretty much everything wrong with old-school roguelikes (as in, one wrong choice kills you, regardless of equipment or what you did beforehand).

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Her hands. I just happened to catch the flare frame.

I see.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Does that mean when she caps strength she goes for the most painful spot?

You know what I mean: the kneecap.

And she'll end adventurers careers left and right.

I would have said the eye, but that's a pretty easy way to kill someone.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh, look, it's Anachronic Glasses Mom.

Thank you for the nickname. I shall now refer to Miriel as AGM.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Weapons change colors, so I guess that's good enough?

Which is pretty much what "SNES games changed weapons sprite" means.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Their AI's bollocks, so I guess that's it.

Just like in gaiden/echoes.

Do they have the excuse of being mind-controlled by a "god" that's currently insane?

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I know!

Why didn't IS steal this from Kaga?!? It would have made Nosferatu even more scary!

Not to mention, if they did that for Echoes, they could make the joke that clerics have access to gaint snakes to smite their foes. And you could have killed Duma with a snake. It would have added to the joke that nobody makes about Silque having a personal squad of ninjas.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

That would not only be nigh impossible to animate, it'd be... well, okay, it'd be even more amazing, but still, I'm fine with the way it is.

Well, they could have just had the jaw open real wide, swallow the unit, have the snake cover the disappearing sprite, and have the giant lump go down it's stomach...

...And you know what? Considering that being swallowed/eaten alive is my irrational fear, that probably would have traumatized a lot of people.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hahahahah... touché, I guess.

We'll have to wait and see whether or not this becomes a reoccurring joke.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The Raiden rocket, you mean?

The move is called Superman, and then WB bought Netherrealm Studios, and they made the Injustice series.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Interesting theories.

Hey. Got to explain someway how bags are worth 1000 gold and why Xeno is holding rope. And more alternative universes need Monty Python.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You, as well?!

Blame the "Lees from Virgina" song @Unknown Gamer11 linked.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Holmes's father, to be precise.

Oh... That's, uh, even worse to forget.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The name of Canaan has been established for a while.

I know, yet I'm surprised that I'm just noticing it as well.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Not quite the same thing, frankly. In Gaiden half the women were either possesed or captured. Here some very obvious assholes are saying sexist things because they're assholes. I don't believe the two things are comparable.

I see. It just reminds of that, is all.

And somehow, Gaiden/Echoes had the biggest A-hole in the game be dead before the game begins. There are times I wish this game did the same.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah... that's gameplay/story segregation at its finest.

Not really, as the mission is "defeat commander", but yeah. It's difficult to do so without going out of your way, and even then that's experience you're missing out on.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Actually, it's not a new one, if you count Sonia from FE7... who's, incidentally, an extremely obvious rip-off of the one that Eugen mentioned there.

I see. Another reason why I'm complaining to Nintendo about not making the games more available.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Eh, it's handled all right in this one, I feel.

Agreed there. It's just something I never understood was a recurring element when it's rarely interesting.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

It's more of a "if you don't know it's coming, you're fucked" situation.

I am never a fan that, no matter the game.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I'll try!

Please do.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hwahahahahah... man, I don't think my limited artistic skills will be able to satisfy you, but I'll try.

Glad to hear.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Jeez! You want the death of me?

No. I just want to see his face skinned, fed his intestines, his bones stabbed into him...

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh, you...

Somebody had to do it.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

What even did you have in mind?

I think I was thinking that his superior was Pavlov.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, I can't talk about any of the others, but Spain's "neutrality" was only due to Francisco Franco realizing that he stood no chance against the Allies, so he just kept a low profile, pretended he was good, things like that. And it worked, nobody gave a flying shit about him and thus he stayed in power until he died of natural causes in 1975. We had fascism until 1975. And now his body rests in the same place where a lot of his victims are buried, the Valley of the Fallen. The left want to move him, the right want him to stay there, and so one of the most pushing national issues (according to the higher ups) involves the location of a bunch of bones.

Ye. And he was one of the few dictators that supported the Nazi's that wasn't executed after the war because of it.

And I see what you mean by it being a national issue. Reminds me of the "statues of slave owners" thing in the US that shows how little people refuse to see the whole picture with history.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The ones where he doesn't appear, right?

Excellent point.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

That's what she's doing, but Sharon's not so easily angered.

For better and worse.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You noticed the hat before you noticed the rapist face?

I was thinking of making a Donnel joke, but Donnel is too awesome to be compared to that scumbag. If anything, I want that villager to kick this slimeballs ass.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yeah, believe me, it's not going to be pretty. I hope you don't think too badly of me after today...

...And the killer Instinct Ultra Combos, and maybe screenshots of Lugaru...

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hoo, boy... if that makes you want to punch me in the face, given what happens today, I sure am glad you don't know where I live.

Image result for death glare

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I will!

Glad to hear it!

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The 15th corpsmen are a lot more powerful, with Great Knights, Paladins, Cavaliers galore and this guy. Mage Knights exist in this game! Except they're a very rare enemy-only class. Personally, I think Maruj should've promoted to this. Given how he's the weakest of the mages, it would've given him a unique niche, but nope.

Interesting. Never got far enough in Sacred Stones to see whether or not they were any good. Strange that it's enemy only, though.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Mintz is here as well, and at first glance he looks just like a better Roger that comes later. Well, more or less, he is, but the main difference is his skillset. He has Wrath and... Flurry. Flurry might just be the single best skill in this game. You know that troll skill in the FE5 that made you get shot by ballistae 5 times instead of once? Well, Flurry's that, except it's manually controlled. If the unit's speed surpasses the enemy's, you just press "flurry" and you'll get up to 5 rounds of combat. Add to that the fact that Mintz can use the pilum at base, and you got a really solid unit.

Sounds... overpowered, yet awesome.

And for some reason, I was reminded of McFlurries when I first read the skill name. Do they make mint McFlurries?

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

vkyN1fM.png

...

Yeah... ladies and gentlemen, I introduce you to Ernst. Look at that. He's so good, I don't even know where to start. He's literally invincible and can one-round everybody, so let's avoid him for now. I don't think even a boatload of crits could get through him, especially considering he's got a +20 defense shield. 2 uses may seem like very little, but on top of 20 AS that's effectively two rounds of combat where we could do absolutely nothing to him. So yeah, extremely blatant roadblock.

Something tells me he's either recruitable later on, or he's optional to fight.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

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Because Ernst exists, we're going to break our word to the mayor and head towards Fort Senay through the town. That's Billford's range I've marked, and the tile in front of Runan is the range of the swordbreaker. Let's try to avoid both for now.

I can see the use of having flags. To bad they don't come in different colors, as then they could have even more utility.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

uUCubpG.png

This guy is a lot braver than Sharon, and even takes some time to do the Runan dance while stabbing Norton for minimal damage!

Right! I forgot to comment on the Runan dance last time! We need to find fitting music for it!

Anyway, does this prove that memetic dances are a thing in this universe?

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I still can't get over the fact that the swordbreaker's bright blue.

I take back what I said last time. Maybe they really are lightsabers, but not as overpowered.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

op5wNfb.pngXaRGS3X.png

Dramatic.

Dramatic is the right word for that. It's a pretty cool quote.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Of course! He has the tiniest chance of getting a crit and he nails it! Only when it's bad for me, only then my units get crit! At least it wasn't a double crit.

Good thing Billford is a knight. Although the inn lady would now know he's lying about what he said earlier if she happened to see that.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

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Suuuuuuuuuuuure... well, guess I'll just have to find a woman to in there.

That might be grounds for a lawsuit if that happened today.

Alas...

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

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This is Runan's levin sword animation. Pretty good.

That is an awesome animation. Almost looks like Runan has force lightning.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

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Ah-ha! You bitch, you couldn't crit the Runan! Luck is on my side today!

Two things:

Myrmidons hold their swords like katans properly.

The reviving end of the Levin sword is awesome.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

FUSlA2W.pngSDQ6OXE.png

And I was so proud of my perfect score thus far...

Giving credit where credit is due, you did last longer than anyone expected.

Also, Runan's death face with a smile just screams "see you in hell".

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

xqf88Sy.png

Eugen, he's fucking dead. That guy bludgeoned his brains to mush with the sharp-looking hammer. Are you just talking to the corpse now?

Eugens reaction seems more fitting if casual mode were a thing in this game.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Cbfg6Vl.png

Oh, never mind, I guess Eugen has the power to bring people back to life, because we don't even get a game over screen, just the choice to try again or go back to the title.

Huh, so it just asks you if you want to retry the map? That's convenient, although it means it can't continue Fire Emblems reputation for the occasionally creepy game over screens.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

krFEDIP.png

The invaders aren't a b?

Is this now an edutainment show?

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

vsCRKDp.png

Billford, the Wild O.

Are these two now the hosts of a PBS show or something in this alternative universe?

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

l9X3N1M.pngI believed in you, Raffin! I waited for you! But you never came back for me. I was so grieved that I even cut off my hair! I hated you so much, I started wishing you would come back just so I could kill you!

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

l9X3N1M.pngPhew... I'm glad that's off my chest. Look, it's all in the past now. There's no time to be dwelling on old wounds when there's a war going on.

That's, uh, one way to blow off steam.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

More recruitment. Did you see that? Billford had a personality for a second there!

Billford is "Generic Knight #I'm-Not-Bothering-To-Count", isn't he?

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Billford's a meme, I believe? At least he seemed to be in that TRS tier list Reddit made a while ago. This guy starts with 100 sword kills for no reason, which effectively gives him 10% hit and crit forever. He also has a movement growth for no reason, which means that, on average, at level 48 promoted he'll have as much movement as Norton (friendly reminder that the absolute highest level you can be in this game is 40). He also learns Flurry at level 38 for no reason, Adept at 31 for no reason and Nihil at 26 for no reason, none of which are as useful as Norton's horse and Urbanite for indoor maps. He's got balanced growths, which are admittedly better than Norton's, but Norton's superior availability (more to the point, coming before the zombie chapter) granted him a fair chance to easily get to level 10 before the route split and gain a horse in time for the more fast-paced chapters. Billford? Billford comes right before a chapter that requires one to run fast as heck, and the map after that one takes place in the forest, where he moves one tile per turn. Also, his bases aren't that great. They're not bad by any means, but they aren't what I'd call stellar.

All in all, Billford feels like a joke unit. He's not that obvious of a joke character at first glance, but when you examine him in more detail, it becomes increasingly evident that he is. I used him once, and it was okay enough, but I find Norton to be way more fun to use.

That... is a very needlessly elaborate way of making a joke unit.

Sucks too. Some parts about Billford sound genuinely useful.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

6Sm5K1R.png

Damn it. Retract my earlier statement about the lawsuit.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Mintz hasn't moved from Ernst's side, by the way. He will now, however. Here's where the awkward part of his recruitment comes into play. You'd think you just talk to him with Runan or something, right? Well, no. He'll be making a beeline for Pavlov's keep. If he makes it there before turn 10, he'll enter the fort and upon seizing, he'll be recruited. However, you can also save Leonie sooner than that by approaching the fort, which forces Pavlov to come out. If this happens, Leonie will be recruited at the end of the chapter. The problem? This makes Mintz leave the battlefield, never to be seen again. I've read somewhere that if you aggro Pavlov before turn 4 Mintz is recruitable later, but it sounds strange, I've never seen that anywhere else and I personally think it's a hoax. I don't know for sure, but I don't think it is true.

Sounds like what is supposed to be a simple step (let character get to destination, and then you can recruit them) is made pointlessly complicated and needlessly punishing.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

This isn't a problem if you're a filthy casual like me, but I can see it being an issue for LTC pros, as Mintz is a unit that actively punishes efficiency. What, you're fast enough to make it to the fort in less than 10 turns? Fuck you, then, you don't get the great prepromoted Paladin.

That sounds like backwards design. Granted, I can understand it from the viewpoint of "if the player can get their in 10 turns, then they don't need this unit", but that is still punishing rather than rewarding the player for doing well.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

2Lz2MFg.png

...oh...

...ergh... okay, so. You know the old saying, "don't shoot the messanger"? Well, allow me to remind you, I'm only the messanger here. I am in no way affiliated to the development of this game, nor did I have any involvement in the making of this decision. Also, this is only fiction. These are only pixels. I am not about to ruin a real little girl's life for the sake of an event. Oh, on that note, let me tell you something: this is the useful thing to do, gameplaywise. You gain something really good if you do this.

...I'm so sorry. If you're wondering, my adress is 123 Fake Street. But please don't lynch me. Lynch Kaga, if you will.

...I have nothing against you.

Kaga, on the other hand...

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

KCMssRQ.png

Shit, actual dialogue...

Oh no...

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

fcJEJ9A.pngCan you help me?

orfi8jp.pngOf course, dearie! Here, have a glass of milk, on the house.

0zFk3fj.png You're not even trying... there's no way she's going to fall for that.

fcJEJ9A.pngReally? Thank you very much! Mmm... It's delicious. Thank you, ma'am.

No... no... no...

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

eLvBTH4.png

fcJEJ9A.pngAah! Who are you?

orfi8jp.pngAh, you don't need to worry about him. He's a regular here. Despite how he looks, he's a very nice man.

And the bastards are exploiting that trope, aren't they?

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png You know, what really scares me is that he looks a lot like me in real life. I don't go around with a rape face, but I do have the neckbeard, the round face, the tiny moustache, the beanie I wear when it's really cold and I have to go outside, the green coat... although, mine is a darker green and actually a bomber coat (not one of those with all the fur every single guy my age wears, though, I'm not what most people would call "hip"), and my beanie's gray and doesn't look like a pot... my point is, I really don't like the fact that I look like that, even if it's only slightly so.

I feel ya. One of the faces in KOTOR 2 is pretty much me without glasses and facial hair. And considering what you can do in that game...

On a side note, Story!Ruben looks much better than this guy, and part of me what's him to punch the daylights out of this bastard.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

exofu84.png

0zFk3fj.png Could you please refrain from telling them personal details like that in the future? Thanks.

Plum, run away! Remember the lessons about stranger danger?

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

XaQD3CQ.pngHmm... Your mother must've been a very beautiful woman...

IfRBMws.png He's a terrible actor! He's the most obvious rapist I've seen in my entire life! Plum, there's no way you can be falling for that!

Would you kindly skin this bastard when you kill him? Please?

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

fcJEJ9A.pngYes, she was... She was a dancer in her youth, so she had a nice figure. I hope I look like her when I get older.

IfRBMws.png You... you imbecile! Don't tell him that!

...She was never taught about stranger danger, was she?

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

XaQD3CQ.pngOho, a dancer? How about you, young lady? Can you dance?

fcJEJ9A.pngYes, my mother taught me a little. I dance by myself every now and then, but never in front of anyone.

mbkVYDx.png

IfRBMws.png I... what? Do you even have a survival instinct?!

...This is how you get the dancer in this game?

...Slay the fucker...

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

XaQD3CQ.pngOh, such a waste... Why even dance at all if no one's watching? How about you come along with me? I can teach you to dance real good.

fcJEJ9A.pngWhat!? No way! There's no way I'm going to dance in front of other people! I-I'm leaving!

IfRBMws.png About time!

...And this is the part were it's too late...

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

yBjYQUj.pngxAqlqM0.png

...

Spoiler

Related image

(I would have put one of his fatalities, but the gif didn't show the whole thing).

 

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

XaQD3CQ.pngI owe you one, Ma'am. Here's a little extra for you.

FigVjGI.png

IfRBMws.png "A-As always"?! Why, you... you... despicable...! Everyone, forget about Pavlov! We're burning this accursed place to the ground and then some!

...Kill them both...

...and don't even think about the word "mercy" when you do so...

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh. They locked the door. Nice. And nobody's going to question the fact that we just lost a Cleric. Nice. Friggin' A. I just sent a little girl to God knows what sort of hellhole, and that's the correct thing to do, because it's the only way to get a dancer in this goddamned game!

In all seriousness... before anyone asks, yes, I can and will rescue her. And no, I wasn't joking: the only way to get a true dancer in this game is by having Plum be kidnapped by that human scum. Joy. Absolute joy.

If it weren't against the law, I would have caved Kagas face in for that.

Even if it doesn't happen in the story, kill those sons of bitches. Bloodily.

And you'd better save her when the time comes.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Let's... let's move on, shall we? There's another house that's open to visitors in this shitty town. I wonder what'll happen next? Maybe they'll hold a knife to Sasha's throat and I'll have to pay 10000 gold to set her free?

If that's the case, then the Lego Mayor has no spine or morality.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

G5YoFh9.png

XYki9uB.png

For some reason, I am reminded of whenever I play Pirates!

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

hTMofYU.png Hahahahahahahah! This reminds me of that part in Papers, Please where some idiot hands over two different passports... ah, but I digress.

Ah yes. I remember that part. I love that game, and I need to play it again. I was (and am) legitimately good at the game, and didn't need to resort to any dirty tricks to stay afloat financially. Heck, I even bought and maintained the Level 5 house until the game was over.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png Well, fuck you very much, I'll get money and come back. That thing is the only sure-fire Pegasus promotion until around chapter 34. I'll get it one way or another.

Dang. Are they as stingy with the other promotion items in the game, or just this one?

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Man, Kaga was feeling quite hateful when he made this chapter, wasn't he? First there's Mintz screwing over efficient players, then there's the whole ordeal at the bar, now this... whew. Who hurt you that day, man?

He probably was, and apparently no one told him what a bad idea the whole thing was.

Kaga does not like being blind player friendly, does he?

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Tqf7iEU.png

Since I don't think I have before, let me show you a nice little thing: in the support menu, aside from the supports, you can check if the unit can promote, to what class, and with what item. Handy.

Nice. A little pointless nowadays considering that the removed class exclusive promotions, but it seems helpful in games with them.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Phew... that was close. Let me explain what just happened: between Mintz reaching the fort and Mintz saving Leonie, a turn goes by. If you enter the Pavlov triggering area in that lapse of time, the game glitches out and pretends Mintz didn't make it. However, since he has already entered the fort, he can't leave the map and vanish forever. The result of this is a glitch where Leonie and Mintz are both recruited at the end of this map. This isn't as beneficial as it may sound like: Leonie is recruited in the next map if she's saved by Mintz anyway, and doing this glitch fucks up their endings rather badly. I'm sure it'd be hilarious to see, but I think I'd rather get to watch the scene where Mintz rescues Leonie, it's another great scene starring him. Please forgive me for the rewinding.

Thou art forgiving. And it seems you managed to present a glitch we didn't know about in the process. That's neat.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

IfRBMws.png Dude, I just said that you're a saint compared to the bar's crooks! Did you hear me and took it as a personal challenge? Damn! I can't even tell who's worse anymore, the serial rapists or the serial rapist!

Both. Kill them all.

Violently.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

6xNwn1c.png

hTMofYU.png Mintz! Save the day, my man!

I can see why they gave him the flurry skill now. They really want you to use him.

If it leads to more moments like these, then they did their job.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png Mintz, just kill his ass. I doubt any of his men are loyal enougy to seek vengeance after he kicks the bucket.

Mintz, for better or worse, probably wants to humiliate Pavlov first before killing the bastard. To bad this game doesn't have more animated cutscenes, for that could have been a sight to see.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

36UFpu6.png

The tables turned quickly.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

jepXLzz.png

There's the shitbag, rearing his ugly mug at last. Unlike the criminals at the pub, I can behead this fucker, something I will take great pleasure on doing.

And so will we.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh, so the flashbangs aren't exclusive to Meriel! This is really strange, because I never notice these frames while playing, whereas I did notice the FE6 flashbangs. I suppose they're just much faster than they were in FE6.

Ruben, you are luckily unlucky to catch stuff like this.

In-universe, I'm blaming the flash from the critical attack.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

JbC99h0.png

Remember what I said about bosses being only as strong as their character'd reasonably be? Pavlov has an expensive weapon, but he can barely lift it and is otherwise pitiful. Very fitting.

Overkill him, would you kindly?

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Kate doesn't kill him in one round, which is good. Let's toy with him a little.

Please do.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

1h4UFR4.pngEueRFrn.png26wGBOr.png

I like the Duke sprite. Looks very regal, but not fit for combat. In other words, it servers its purpose.

Took the words right out of my mouth.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

8Hj9MuW.png

Now the offscreen ladies are saved.

Eh, not as violent as I was picturing, but that just means I can use my imagination that Runan did this:

Spoiler

 

 

Spoiler

Image result for kung lao brutality gif

 

 

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

HqqX4LL.png

Ah, so he does leave.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

ZViYyv3.pngFrom a careful reading of the message, it seems that he cannot trust the other generals there, and that you were the only man he could turn to. You can read here for yourself, sir.

gAbVkav.pngIndeed, you're right... The prince must fear a rebellion by the Generals who have sided with the Cult. It seems things have gotten much worse during my absence.

Not a bad way to explain why Ernst has to go. It helps reinforce his trustworthiness as a person and might as a soldier.

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png To think this scene is hidden behind an event flag that any sane person would never think to trigger...

Wait, so how do you trigger it?

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

xKBlc2j.png

I have to say, I like this guy's golden armor. Norton's all-black style's good too, but look at all the gold!

Agreed. Is this a call back to the Gold Knights of Gaiden?

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

UcNdKVu.pngfj19aK5.pngmKGYmwe.png

Cute animations, my friend.

I don't know why, but the helmet just makes them look goofy in a fun way.

It's like they're saying "Yes, my armor is purple and pink. Shut up."

4 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, we had some hiccups along the way, but overall, I'm happy with the way things turned out! Tune in next time for some plot, and even if you don't feel like it, that's all right, I still hope you fare well. Buh-bye!

Phew. What a level. I can see why you said this would be the most infamous part of the game.

With hope, those bastards will get what's coming to them.

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On 1/6/2019 at 7:59 PM, Hawkwing said:

And since you posted right when I got online, I shall risk double-posting!

Well what can I say except

giphy.webp

On 1/7/2019 at 3:07 AM, Ruminant said:

I don't normally like doing spelling corrections because to be honest I don't think spelling is that important unless mistakes cause errors in communication, but since English is your second language and this is evidently a new word to you regardless, it's spelled "ersatz".

Sorry, that's my fault. I've always misspelled the word and it being a German loan word doesn't excuse that.

7 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I only remember being disappointed every time I got a ninja. Don't think I ever bothered looking at their names.

Hey, Kagero and her weapon are useable.

And units like Matthew are also daggers. Usually thieves ended up getting them.

8 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

It did give me Seth. I guess... something? I like Seth enough.

If it gave SS Seth, I'd agree.

Heroes Seth must be a new recruit in comparison, sadly.

9 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I don't even understand those. Aside from the piss-poor matchmakng (once, I got a raid where my opponent had just randomly placed the starting guys at base level. The inmediately next raid had 5 star units at level 40.), I can't figure out how to become eligible as an opponent.

I'm not so surprised that's happening, I think they're coming to a point where it's harder for newer people to get into the game. Which is an absolute shame, because it wasn't like this last year.

On top of that, that's some real shoddy design right there if it can't account for that, but I think the assumption is that you'd get a team trained up beforehand.

Which isn't made easier by 1. exp gain being "upgradeable" by spending orbs (That probably should be fixed actually, I should send feedback as that being a way to improve newcomer's experience), 2. newer players not having teams trained up and there being no guarantee that there'd be a way for them to face a fair level of challenge in AR (level wise, some of these raids are horrible by design). That's pretty bad actually, I should mention this somewhere.

9 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Looks good. I'd buy.

But is it heavy metal or christian rock? I don't think we can tell with this cover.

10 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

There's tanks in this game.

Literally only have bows, which while dangerous, can be more easily dealt with by Sasha..

I'm pretty sure I'd remember if TRS has rocket propelled ammunition.

11 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Probably because I never even watched Aladdin. Never was much of a Disney kid. Heck, I only watched The Lion King for the first time last year.

>Not much of a Disney Kid

Alright, sure. I was most definitely one though.

>Only watched Lion King last year.

Heresy.

11 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The problem with Alejandro is that the spanish "j" sound doesn't seem to exist in the english alphabet. It's sort of like when you're trying to spit, and you make a horrendous raspy sound. Could also be described as a more intense "h". Other than that, it's really easy. No gimmickies here, you just say it as you'd read it.

Those... those seem like random gibberish.

I was using Alejandro a bit jokingly, but still.

Gibberish? GIBBERISH! I'll have no such insults.

Niamh has the i pronounced like an e and mh is essentially a v sound in Irish, so "Neeav" would be pretty accurate. Naoise... that one actually gets me, as I'd pronounce it as "nee-sha" but it's this. Saorise is a bit notorious for some people but the only tricky part is the ao, which is pretty easily resolved when you realise saor is a word in Irish (free) and it's the same pronunciation. I would say that, but the "ao" is more commonly pronounced "eo". This is what happens when you have generations of foreign names get used more and more and the language die in relevance for many reasons.

11 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Sonia*

Well that's another one for me.

I haven't played GBA FE in a while honestly.

12 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Eugen's so godly he hacked your SF account to trash-talk Albertus.

I mean, I think he owes me for that.

13 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

That's more likely, given who he is.

I'm pretty sure he wouldn't be reckless enough to turn into a dragon in a place where the populace would be utterly terrified.

Right?

1 hour ago, Saint Rubenio said:

He could fuck up his face!

Or he could do this.

13 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Poor man... he does not deserve these jokes.

He didn't deserve the whip either but he was still almost made an acquaintance of it.

14 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Base Allen with iron weapons? Yes. Yes I would. Wendy's another story, but Barth's one saving grace is his great base defense.

I wasn't thinking base for it, but still.

16 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

vkyN1fM.png

That's a large pile of nope atop a destrier of nope.

17 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

2Ialr9d.png

Urgh... why can't you talk to Billford, Raffin? Do you not like him?

I mean, considering Billford's white knight status and Raffin having a bad boy history to him (shush), I'm not surprised.

19 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

jw30Kwm.png

This is Runan's levin sword animation. Pretty good.

HE HAS THE POW- I'll stop.

I've got better.

20 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

FUSlA2W.pngSDQ6OXE.png

And I was so proud of my perfect score thus far...

Oh no, the Ironman's over.

Pack it up, we're done here-

20 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh, never mind, I guess Eugen has the power to bring people back to life, because we don't even get a game over screen, just the choice to try again or go back to the title.

Eugen, man. He's the hero we need, but not the hero we deserve. He's too good for us to deserve him.

I guess not.

22 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

voJddRd.png

Raffin hears those words and realises that all his mistakes were coming back to haunt him.

23 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

HP 55% - Strength 25% - Skill 35% - Speed 45% - Defense 20% - Magic 10% - Luck 25% - Mastery 35%

Sharon's Kate with ever-so-slighly better bases, Flurry at level 15 and Canto way too late, without Kate's nearly perfect availability. Frankly, I've never bothered. The time I tried, she died. I guess she could work since she has a mutual support with Raffin, but I'm not using Raffin (shocking, I know), while Kate has plenty of people she supports and is supported by, so... yeah. I don't think I'll use Sharon.

She does get Flurry.

23 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

hzjD3Lu.png

Absolutely awesome. I'm glad I got this as a reward for being throughoutly incompetent. Keep this up, Runan.

Bravo, a lord who can pick up bases.

Still worrying about his defence(s), I don't remember this being a game for dodgetanking.

24 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

HP 90% - Strength 35% - Skill 30% - Speed 35% - Defense 30% - Magic 5% - Luck 35% - Mastery 20% - Movement 5%

Billford's a meme, I believe? At least he seemed to be in that TRS tier list Reddit made a while ago. This guy starts with 100 sword kills for no reason, which effectively gives him 10% hit and crit forever. He also has a movement growth for no reason, which means that, on average, at level 48 promoted he'll have as much movement as Norton (friendly reminder that the absolute highest level you can be in this game is 40). He also learns Flurry at level 38 for no reason, Adept at 31 for no reason and Nihil at 26 for no reason, none of which are as useful as Norton's horse and Urbanite for indoor maps. He's got balanced growths, which are admittedly better than Norton's, but Norton's superior availability (more to the point, coming before the zombie chapter) granted him a fair chance to easily get to level 10 before the route split and gain a horse in time for the more fast-paced chapters. Billford? Billford comes right before a chapter that requires one to run fast as heck, and the map after that one takes place in the forest, where he moves one tile per turn. Also, his bases aren't that great. They're not bad by any means, but they aren't what I'd call stellar.

All in all, Billford feels like a joke unit. He's not that obvious of a joke character at first glance, but when you examine him in more detail, it becomes increasingly evident that he is. I used him once, and it was okay enough, but I find Norton to be way more fun to use.

Use the meme?

No? Okay.

26 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

bNJnN1L.pngiqAEuYe.png

This divine lightleeng shall pierce the skies!

The pun ruins the pronunciation.

Criticalee ruining imo.

27 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...ergh... okay, so. You know the old saying, "don't shoot the messanger"? Well, allow me to remind you, I'm only the messanger here. I am in no way affiliated to the development of this game, nor did I have any involvement in the making of this decision. Also, this is only fiction. These are only pixels. I am not about to ruin a real little girl's life for the sake of an event. Oh, on that note, let me tell you something: this is the useful thing to do, gameplaywise. You gain something really good if you do this.

...I'm so sorry. If you're wondering, my adress is 123 Fake Street. But please don't lynch me. Lynch Kaga, if you will.

Yep, this moment..... Can we hope that we don't get this kind of choice again?

28 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

BtTfFZu.png19WHWbd.png

Are you serious? Who's less threatening than Enteh!?

She knows what Enteh is.

Perceptive.

30 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png You got "separated"? I sent you here! I guess the in-universe explanation is that Runan ordered you to come he--

Well, maybe she's been ducking into cover as she moves hoping to avoid detection.

She's also very naive, so it could lead to this.

That still doesn't explain the player's actions.

29 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

orfi8jp.pngAh, you don't need to worry about him. He's a regular here. Despite how he looks, he's a very nice man.

0zFk3fj.png You know, what really scares me is that he looks a lot like me in real life. I don't go around with a rape face, but I do have the neckbeard, the round face, the tiny moustache, the beanie I wear when it's really cold and I have to go outside, the green coat... although, mine is a darker green and actually a bomber coat (not one of those with all the fur every single guy my age wears, though, I'm not what most people would call "hip"), and my beanie's gray and doesn't look like a pot... my point is, I really don't like the fact that I look like that, even if it's only slightly so.

That's awkward to hear about someone referred to as a "very nice man"

Is there something you're not telling us?

31 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

yBjYQUj.pngxAqlqM0.png

IfRBMws.png Piece of shit! And you were complaining about Pavlov, you guys! Pavlov's fucking Gandhi compared to this fucker!

It really wasn't out there by this point.

That being said, this man is absolutely terrible. And that comparison he says is disgusting. Just, fuck 'im.

31 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

FigVjGI.png

IfRBMws.png "A-As always"?! Why, you... you... despicable...! Everyone, forget about Pavlov! We're burning this accursed place to the ground and then some!

I'd say nuke it from orbit, but they don't have that. Or Katri's dragon form.

Where's yer man when you need him?

34 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Phew... that was close. Let me explain what just happened: between Mintz reaching the fort and Mintz saving Leonie, a turn goes by. If you enter the Pavlov triggering area in that lapse of time, the game glitches out and pretends Mintz didn't make it. However, since he has already entered the fort, he can't leave the map and vanish forever. The result of this is a glitch where Leonie and Mintz are both recruited at the end of this map. This isn't as beneficial as it may sound like: Leonie is recruited in the next map if she's saved by Mintz anyway, and doing this glitch fucks up their endings rather badly. I'm sure it'd be hilarious to see, but I think I'd rather get to watch the scene where Mintz rescues Leonie, it's another great scene starring him. Please forgive me for the rewinding.

There's plenty of times I wonder if Kaga got QA on his games.

This seems to indicate that they at least were kind of done that day to not catch this.

34 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

soiQK3r.pngBeing burnt alive must be oh so painful... But if you beg for forgiveness, I might just release you. I could use a cute little girl like you among my... other ladies.

OKAY THAT'S IT I HAD TRIED TO AVOID REFERENCING FROLLO.

BUT IF YOU'RE NOT TRYING PAVLOV NEITHER AM I.

(Hell, Mintz is a perfect Quasimodo.)

36 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

36UFpu6.png

soiQK3r.pngYou traitor scum...! Once I'm through with you, you'll be begging for the sweet embrace of death! You there, throw this traitor in the dungeon!

How did he get captured?

HOW?

EoGrgeJ.png

38 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

nk5l5u2.png

What? Ernst, I thought nobody cared about Pavlov! That guy clearly does!

Pavlov had enough money left after the cult to pay the healer.

38 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

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Awesome! Great, great, absolutely amazing! Hahahahahah! Great strength, great mastery, great HP, only one defense point short of Mintz's defense... this is all really impressive, Kate, I'm truly glad I gave you a chance! I truly am!

Kate's getting pretty solid.

Shame your mages aren't as consistent.

38 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

lcHo6Ab.png

You're so fast! It's rather nice to see.

Defence would be nice, though he at least isn't looking slow.

39 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

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Magic, great! I always like to see Lee getting magic. I tend to have magic-blessed Lees (both the one from my scrapped run and the one from my first finished run had very good magic), and considering he starts off with enough speed to avoid being doubled forever and even double a good amount of enemies consistently, magic is all I really want from him. The luck's good, too, wouldn't want a stray arrow to hit him critically.

Well, I would say the thing, but I don't think I need to.

41 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Sharon, too, levels up. Impress me like Kreiss did back in the day, woman, and I shall reward you.

aecuF7w.png

You had your chance. Off to the bench with you now.

Bye Sharon, you.... tried?

42 minutes ago, Saint Rubenio said:

kHoByav.png

It's like Dougy on a horse. All the strength, all the defense, surprisingly serviceable speed, above-average movement... only there isn't a godly Warrior to do all that and more this time around, and I can give the boots to someone else. Say what you will, guys, but I'm sure Narron wouldn't have been nearly as good. Or entertaining! Hah!

Narron could have been as good, but this guy'll make Dougy look bad. I am okay with this.

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6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Cbfg6Vl.png

Oh, never mind, I guess Eugen has the power to bring people back to life, because we don't even get a game over screen, just the choice to try again or go back to the title.

If Eugen has the power to revive the dead, then why does he only use it on game over characters? Is he so powerful he can afford to just toy with us?

Given he can bring back the deceased, who knows what other sort of power he has in store...

6 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

dOlxN4U.png

HP 90% - Strength 35% - Skill 30% - Speed 35% - Defense 30% - Magic 5% - Luck 35% - Mastery 20% - Movement 5%

(Billford analysis)

All in all, Billford feels like a joke unit. He's not that obvious of a joke character at first glance, but when you examine him in more detail, it becomes increasingly evident that he is. I used him once, and it was okay enough, but I find Norton to be way more fun to use.

The way I described Norton back when he joined (as a unit with unique traits that ultimately aren't that useful) seems to be much more fitting of Billford. A movement growth (that's only 5%, so having it proc enough to be meaningful is unlikely); a solid spread of other growths (aside from a huge Mastery lead, his bases are barely any better than Norton's, not to mention the level/availability differences); an array of useful skills (only available at high levels). While +10 Hit and Crit at base is a helpful attribute, Norton's superior promoted movement (which I may have undersold at first, because I wasn't aware of how much experience the Entombed give in this game and therefore overestimated how hard it was to get Norton to promotion) still makes him out to be a better tank option.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

bNJnN1L.pngiqAEuYe.png

This divine lightleeng shall pierce the skies!

TLP but everything is the same except Siegfried is replaced by Lee.

Wouldn't mind a game with Lee as one of the lords to be honest, he seems like a pretty cool guy.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

This isn't a problem if you're a filthy casual like me, but I can see it being an issue for LTC pros, as Mintz is a unit that actively punishes efficiency. What, you're fast enough to make it to the fort in less than 10 turns? Fuck you, then, you don't get the great prepromoted Paladin.

Reminds me of how FE7 punishes you for playing Pale Flower of Darkness quickly by giving you Karel instead of the superior-in-every-way-that-matters Harken.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh. They locked the door. Nice. And nobody's going to question the fact that we just lost a Cleric. Nice. Friggin' A. I just sent a little girl to God knows what sort of hellhole, and that's the correct thing to do, because it's the only way to get a dancer in this goddamned game!

In all seriousness... before anyone asks, yes, I can and will rescue her. And no, I wasn't joking: the only way to get a true dancer in this game is by having Plum be kidnapped by that human scum. Joy. Absolute joy.

Just going to summarize my thoughts on that scene by saying why did Kaga think any of that was a good idea? It's bad enough that the game gives you the option to let a 15-year-old girl get drugged, kidnapped and probably sold into sex slavery, but the fact that it rewards you for doing so is just... ugh.

Needless to say I won't be doing this when I get around to playing this game.

7 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

6xNwn1c.png

hTMofYU.png Mintz! Save the day, my man!

Mintz has ceased being relatable, he's too cool in this scene.

Even if he still ended up captured by the end of it, but that's not the point...

1 hour ago, Dayni said:

Sorry, that's my fault. I've always misspelled the word and it being a German loan word doesn't excuse that.

Don't worry, it's fine; we all make mistakes, and it wasn't that bad a mistake anyway.

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9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

xqf88Sy.png

Eugen, he's fucking dead. That guy bludgeoned his brains to mush with the sharp-looking hammer. Are you just talking to the corpse now?

Well, obviously, Eugen is an extremely powerful wizard, so powerful in fact, he can communicate with the dead, though time and parallel universes. Read the lore.

 

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

As well, I have Runan open this bag of cash. Sweet, nearly the maximum amount we could've gotten! That'll come in handy later.

I honestly fail to see any purpose in the moneybag mechanic. Could somebody enlighten me?

 

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

vsCRKDp.png1YpeldB.png

Blah blah, get on with it, will ya?

Bilford, the wild O. Now i'm never calling him anything else.

 

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Sigh... failing.

FaiLeeng*

 

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I don't want this guy to roam freely, therefore...

FreLee*

 

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

This divine lightleeng shall pierce the skies!

No.

 

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Mintz hasn't moved from Ernst's side, by the way. He will now, however. Here's where the awkward part of his recruitment comes into play. You'd think you just talk to him with Runan or something, right? Well, no. He'll be making a beeline for Pavlov's keep. If he makes it there before turn 10, he'll enter the fort and upon seizing, he'll be recruited. However, you can also save Leonie sooner than that by approaching the fort, which forces Pavlov to come out. If this happens, Leonie will be recruited at the end of the chapter. The problem? This makes Mintz leave the battlefield, never to be seen again. I've read somewhere that if you aggro Pavlov before turn 4 Mintz is recruitable later, but it sounds strange, I've never seen that anywhere else and I personally think it's a hoax. I don't know for sure, but I don't think it is true.

That is the most Kaga paragraph i've ever read.

 

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

...I'm so sorry. If you're wondering, my adress is 123 Fake Street. But please don't lynch me. Lynch Kaga, if you will.

...I'm excited and terrified in equal parts.

Also, Leench*

 

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

mbkVYDx.png

Plum, you must be the stupidest character in any FE game, official or otherwise.

 

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

kzUPdhI.png

Let's heal him up, though, to be sure.

Leet's*

 

9 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

8GyLMsK.pngzuHK86f.png

So let's have Meriel kill this guy with her tiny stars. A waste, I know but I wanted him out of the way.

Headcanon: The enemy doesn't take damage from the spell, but from the embarrassment of being hit with such a stupid-looking attack.

 

10 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

lsdUE4A.png

Bunch o' fighting here. I panicked a little when this happened, but we're good, we're good.

A Leetle*

 

10 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

vBLqZ5X.png

Eh, at least he's now guaranteed to get a level once this guy dies.

At Leeast*

 

5 hours ago, Hawkwing said:

I don't know why, but the helmet just makes them look goofy in a fun way.

It's like they're saying "Yes, my armor is purple and pink. Shut up."

Their idle frames makes them look like they're staring into your soul.

 

4 hours ago, Dayni said:

The pun ruins the pronunciation.

Criticalee ruining imo.

Wonderful.

 

4 hours ago, Dayni said:

How did he get captured?

HOW?

EoGrgeJ.png

I'm saving that portrait for future use.

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14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Worse: Bayonetta in Sm4sh.

Never shelled out for the DLC. Well except returning characters. When Smash Ultimate was announced, I knew I made the right choice.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

"Hitler cruficied my son!!"

Well to be fair, Jesus had a jewish mother and earthly father. Seems like the sort of thing Hitler would do.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, I mean, I don't have any faith in neither other countries' elections nor my own, so I guess I at least am not a hypocrite.

I used to have faith in one party over the other. Not so much these days. I am smart enough to know I benefit from the current regime going out based on some proposed plans. But other than that it doesn't matter half as much as it used to.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Lee takes Dagon's hellfire

It's a good thing Lee is an honest man or this could end diabolicalee

 

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

duTTZi4.png

Mintz is here as well, and at first glance he looks just like a better Roger that comes later. Well, more or less, he is, but the main difference is his skillset. He has Wrath and... Flurry. Flurry might just be the single best skill in this game. You know that troll skill in the FE5 that made you get shot by ballistae 5 times instead of once? Well, Flurry's that, except it's manually controlled. If the unit's speed surpasses the enemy's, you just press "flurry" and you'll get up to 5 rounds of combat. Add to that the fact that Mintz can use the pilum at base, and you got a really solid unit.

A better The Roger the Paladin? Poor bastard is even outclassed when he's good.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

q9CSfdW.pngjw30Kwm.png

This is Runan's levin sword animation. Pretty good.

"I HAVE THE POWER"

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

FUSlA2W.pngSDQ6OXE.png

And I was so proud of my perfect score thus far...

BY THE POWER OF SPLITSKULL...
2ZUQD6m.png

 

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

xqf88Sy.png

Eugen, he's fucking dead. That guy bludgeoned his brains to mush with the sharp-looking hammer. Are you just talking to the corpse now?

Cbfg6Vl.png

Oh, never mind, I guess Eugen has the power to bring people back to life, because we don't even get a game over screen, just the choice to try again or go back to the title.

Eugen, man. He's the hero we need, but not the hero we deserve. He's too good for us to deserve him.

The Eugen is God meme looks more plausible now. I mean Eugen just tells Runan to clear his mind of distractions (like that hammer and bits of skull) and he's good to go again.

 

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

dOlxN4U.png

HP 90% - Strength 35% - Skill 30% - Speed 35% - Defense 30% - Magic 5% - Luck 35% - Mastery 20% - Movement 5%

Billford's a meme, I believe? At least he seemed to be in that TRS tier list Reddit made a while ago. This guy starts with 100 sword kills for no reason, which effectively gives him 10% hit and crit forever. He also has a movement growth for no reason, which means that, on average, at level 48 promoted he'll have as much movement as Norton (friendly reminder that the absolute highest level you can be in this game is 40). He also learns Flurry at level 38 for no reason, Adept at 31 for no reason and Nihil at 26 for no reason, none of which are as useful as Norton's horse and Urbanite for indoor maps. He's got balanced growths, which are admittedly better than Norton's, but Norton's superior availability (more to the point, coming before the zombie chapter) granted him a fair chance to easily get to level 10 before the route split and gain a horse in time for the more fast-paced chapters. Billford? Billford comes right before a chapter that requires one to run fast as heck, and the map after that one takes place in the forest, where he moves one tile per turn. Also, his bases aren't that great. They're not bad by any means, but they aren't what I'd call stellar.

All in all, Billford feels like a joke unit. He's not that obvious of a joke character at first glance, but when you examine him in more detail, it becomes increasingly evident that he is. I used him once, and it was okay enough, but I find Norton to be way more fun to use.

Sad, because it looks like he could have actually been good if he came at a different time. Especially if that movement growth hit more times than was likely.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

bNJnN1L.pngiqAEuYe.png

This divine lightleeng shall pierce the skies!

Leethal.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

..I'm so sorry. If you're wondering, my adress is 123 Fake Street. But please don't lynch me. Lynch Kaga, if you will.

So I've been using your address on internet surveys for years. Good to know.

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

You know, what really scares me is that he looks a lot like me in real life. I don't go around with a rape face, but I do have the neckbeard, the round face, the tiny moustache, the beanie I wear when it's really cold and I have to go outside, the green coat... although, mine is a darker green and actually a bomber coat (not one of those with all the fur every single guy my age wears, though, I'm not what most people would call "hip"), and my beanie's gray and doesn't look like a pot... my point is, I really don't like the fact that I look like that, even if it's only slightly so.

I was thinking he looks like Stromboli from Pinnochio. Come to think of it that's kind of similar circumstances in that he keeps Pinnochio in a cage and makes him sing and dance for money.... and Stromboli is one of the rare Disney villains that get away with no comeuppance... Stromboli? Is that you?

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

XYki9uB.png

O4FKLTV.png Also did I mention I am not a cat?

 

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Being burnt alive must be oh so painful... But if you beg for forgiveness, I might just release you. I could use a cute little girl like you among my... other ladies.

IfRBMws.png Dude, I just said that you're a saint compared to the bar's crooks! Did you hear me and took it as a personal challenge? Damn! I can't even tell who's worse anymore, the serial rapists or the serial rapist!

Worse, I already used my cornflakes joke about Runan's smile, so I can't even diffuse the situation with it. Seriously, if I sold that Frollo valentines day card, this town would probably be my number one buyer.
Hell at Christmas they probably post this and it's not even a typo for them (and no, I don't know whose post it is either). Zr8yH8R.png

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

8Hj9MuW.png

Now the offscreen ladies are saved.

Missed chance. You should have just put an "assist trophy" in his portrait box

14 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

The luck's good, too, wouldn't want a stray arrow to hit him critically.

You mean criticalee

Edited by Mad-manakete
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On 12/30/2018 at 12:48 AM, Mad-manakete said:
On 12/29/2018 at 9:27 PM, Saint Rubenio said:

nRo0gU2.pngFaZuiQj.png

And now it's even solider! I'm proud of you, smiley boy. Now you just need to learn how to smile without looking like a serial rapist.

Decent lord. Just keep him away from your cornflakes, and be sure any liquid is actually milk. (Too far? Maybe I should stick to Martel jokes and Lee puns)

Pardon the double post... but I just realized I pre-empted that tavern scene unintentionally. Turns out my jokes re-write reality.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

fcJEJ9A.pngAh, yes... I got separated from my companions, and don't know where to go...

0zFk3fj.png You got "separated"? I sent you here! I guess the in-universe explanation is that Runan ordered you to come he--

IfRBMws.png Oh, for fucks sake, Runan! Don't try to hide it, I saw you smiling for a second there! C'mere, you little...!

The joke about Runan's smile is particularly telling.

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

orfi8jp.pngOf course, dearie! Here, have a glass of milk, on the house.

0zFk3fj.png You're not even trying... there's no way she's going to fall for that.

fcJEJ9A.pngReally? Thank you very much! Mmm... It's delicious. Thank you, ma'am.

As is the milk... that turns out to be...

15 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

yBjYQUj.pngxAqlqM0.png

Drugged. Almost exactly like my earlier joke. Now I feel like I accidentally caused this. I shudder to think on the consequences of my Martel jokes.

 

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Part 20 - The mayor, an intellectual.

I've had some rather busy days, and my progress on the update kept on getting half-deleted in the middle of replying to everyone for some reason and I started to feel like I was trudging through the desert.

I swear, I know I said I like long replies, and I do enjoy reading them a lot, but you know this is starting to get a little out of hand when I spend days trying to get through all the darned replies and the update itself takes me one. Good thing this is just a rather short update.

Replies:

Spoiler
On 9/1/2019 at 7:49 PM, BrightBow said:

16 Defense? That is one durable Norton. When I used him I felt he really was no more durable then other mounts on the same level while being far worse in everything else. So he was quite a letdown.

His growth is rather shaky, but I've been getting some good levels. I'm glad, too, I like Norton.

Dragon Flutes are definitely special from other promotion items. There are only enough to promote half of the Pegasus Knights in the game and they can't be sold, unlike other promotion items. And the other one isn't exactly easy to get either. Well, it is easy, but it's one of those things that depend on a specific character being on a specific route. So it's easy to miss unless you already know. So I think they definitely made them difficult to get on purpose. ...however, certain people do get to become Dragon Knights for free for whatever reason. So it's still pretty weird.
The good thing is that Pegasus Knights are still some of the best units around even without promotion.
Still, if Pegasus Knights being unpromoted is supposed to be expected, then they should be able to at least reach lv 30, like the classes that can't promote at all. Fortunately even unpromoted units can hit the level cap in this game, thanks to the Super Proof items. But it's still pretty annoying.

I agree with everything.

It really sucks to be a low level unit that joins on Runan's side after the first route split like Sharon. Because now the rest of the maps are spread across two different teams, so you have a lot less time to get experience... at least if you are on Runan's route. Holmes has a ton of EXP on his route until the second split. And after the second split, there isn't actually that much EXP on Holmes' route unless you purposefully grind. At least that was always my impression.

In all honesty, both Sharon and Billford aren't so hard to train, I just didn't bother.

And Plum... yeah...
Not only is this the only way to get a dancer, it's also the only way to advance her subplot. *urgh*

Shudders...
I suppose I'm gonna hold back on this topic for now, until we come back to this guy. Because for now I wouldn't actually have too much of a problem with this. Well, besides the fact that the player has to be the one to pull the trigger here. And I actually like how this creeps partner in crime is this innocent looking old lady. Just a normal, everyday person only in it for the money.
But after this? It's gonna be awful. Really, really, really awful.

Yeah...
I suppose one thing I don't give Tellius enough credit is to heavily tone down this obligatory fantasy setting sexism. And not to have all those rapists everywhere. Kaga had been gone for a while by that point, but these things were still very present throughout the Elibe games.

Honestly, I'm fine with rapists being everywhere. The world isn't all sunshine and rainbows, bad people exist and have always existed. The fact that I am rewarded for feeding them victims, though? That isn't so nice.

 

On 9/1/2019 at 7:59 PM, Pengaius said:

So it begins

Don't remind me, would you?

 

On 9/1/2019 at 10:28 PM, eclipse said:

There's only enough room for one smart-mouthed woman on each route, and Sharon would've made number two.

She isn't quite as smart-mouthed as Esther, really. She lashed out at Raffin and that's about it. Friggin' Billford's more smart-mouthed than her, with his whole trolling of the kidnapping bitch.

Can't wait to see Esther back in action~!

Perhaps you will.

 

On 9/1/2019 at 11:28 PM, Hawkwing said:

Fair warning ahead of time that anything spoilered in this reply will contain violent content.

I am not comfortable with that.

Ah. So that's why the update was a little slow. Thanks for the warning.

Hey, gotta keep the readers informed. I may suck at keeping a schedule, but I will sure as heck excuse myself as much as it takes.

The character artwork and animations are really good as well. When compared to their previous games, you can really see how the artists have improved.

Good for them, then!

Right when I started writing, the update came. Thought I could barely make it, but who knows? Maybe it was for the better.

Perhaps. You didn't even double-post, anyway!

Hey, I made a promise, and I intend to keep it this time.

Bah, no worries, really. Although, it really would've been a shame if this reply didn't come to exist. Man, did I laugh with this piece. While nervously tuging my collar, but hey, I laughed!

I still need to play the older FE games. It isn't out of a lack of trying, mind you, but Nintendo isn't doing the best of jobs making them available. And as I mentioned before, my laptop hates emulators for some reason.

Nintendo doesn't give a damn. Emulators are the way to go for anything older than the DS and anything more obscure than Fire Emblem.

They shouldn't take to long to unlock, if memory serves me correctly.

What can I say, Heroes was doomed to irrelevance when I downloaded an old favourite of mine for mobile phones. Pocket Trains, which I could never seem to be able to play for long because my phone always had terrible storage capacity and I had to remove all of my games incredibly soon, and my tablet was awkward to take to places and soon became a slowpoke as well. This new phone of mine, however, has plenty of space, so I've finally been able to enjoy the game fully. Really relaxing game.

At the moment, it's a pretty good size.

Good, I guess I'll keep it as is for now.

I'm a more casual fan. I have one of the genesis collections and a few other games, and I do enjoy them, but otherwise it's not my favorite series or anything like that.

I understand.

The game is weird, and I love it for it. Even if it makes difficult to discuss the game with someone who's never played it before, to the point I've kind of given up on doing so.

I know the feeling.

A lot of them are pretty damn good. Heck, Republic Command is my favorite shooter, the stories of the KOTOR games are awesome, the Jedi Knight series has awesome lightsaber combat, and it's fun to use the force in The Force Unleashed. Oh, and the Podracing game is actually really good. And so are are the X-Wing, TIE Fighter, and Starfighter series.

...Dang Star Wars has a lot of games.

It's one of the most popular franchises in any kind of fiction ever. It's no wonder it has lots of games.

"But Ruben, would you sacrifice those 'some times' for always being reassuring?"

Yes, yes I would, especially if it meant I would always be right when I said "nobody's going to die ever".

Guess they had to make some improvement after being 1000 years after a previous game. Even if they excused still being in the middle ages with "Evil dragon destroyed the world so hard, civilization had to research everything again".

That's... a little dumb.

Yeah, it's something that I think is less prevalent than people make it out to be, but it's still not hard to see where the complaint came from.

I see.

Honestly, it's hard to find anything positive to talk about politics.

I agree. Pretty much the only thing I know for a fact about politics is that I hate them and want them to influence my life as little as I possibly can. Given how important they are for society as a whole, it's a bit of a fool's errand, but I can try.

He'd annoy the heck out of philosophers, then.

He'd annoy the heck out of most people.

Maybe. I'm not dirty minded in that area.

Violence, on the other hand...

Oh, God, that came out even more wrong!

It's a roguelike post-apocalyptic survival game with no zombie, guns are rare and ammo rarer, and there are no nukes. It's a pretty good game. The crafting system is clever and open (as in, you can make a cast out of a stick and some rags, but you can also make one out of a crowbar, a dead squirrel, and a paper bag. You can also screw on binoculars to a gun to make a scope), the combat is pretty immersive depite being text based, and it manages to have grey morality moments that aren't at all scripted.

About my only complaint against it is that the few story-based areas are pretty much everything wrong with old-school roguelikes (as in, one wrong choice kills you, regardless of equipment or what you did beforehand).

Sounds interesting enough.

I see.

And she'll end adventurers careers left and right.

I would have said the eye, but that's a pretty easy way to kill someone.

Unless she grabs her arrow and gently slices their eyes without touching anything else, I don't see how she could do that.

Thank you for the nickname. I shall now refer to Miriel as AGM.

I've done a great deed, indeed.

Which is pretty much what "SNES games changed weapons sprite" means.

Yeop.

Just like in gaiden/echoes.

Do they have the excuse of being mind-controlled by a "god" that's currently insane?

Well, no, but they do have an excuse.

Why didn't IS steal this from Kaga?!? It would have made Nosferatu even more scary!

Not to mention, if they did that for Echoes, they could make the joke that clerics have access to gaint snakes to smite their foes. And you could have killed Duma with a snake. It would have added to the joke that nobody makes about Silque having a personal squad of ninjas.

3D TRS Nosferatu would've been one hell of a sight to behold.

Well, they could have just had the jaw open real wide, swallow the unit, have the snake cover the disappearing sprite, and have the giant lump go down it's stomach...

...And you know what? Considering that being swallowed/eaten alive is my irrational fear, that probably would have traumatized a lot of people.

Not to mention, how would you handle non-lethal hits? Would the unit just break out of the snake's stomach like it's nobody's bussiness?

We'll have to wait and see whether or not this becomes a reoccurring joke.

Maybe.

The move is called Superman, and then WB bought Netherrealm Studios, and they made the Injustice series

Marvelous.

Hey. Got to explain someway how bags are worth 1000 gold and why Xeno is holding rope. And more alternative universes need Monty Python.

Hahahahah... how would you explain a town of rapists, thieves and corrupt politicians not having been burnt to the ground by anyone yet, then?

Blame the "Lees from Virgina" song @Unknown Gamer11 linked.

I don't blame it, I thank it.

Oh... That's, uh, even worse to forget.

I know, yet I'm surprised that I'm just noticing it as well.

Really bad, I agree. Bad Hawkwing, go and reflect on your actions.

I see. It just reminds of that, is all.

And somehow, Gaiden/Echoes had the biggest A-hole in the game be dead before the game begins. There are times I wish this game did the same.

Oh, no, in this game, if you do get to kill the assholes at all, you'd better be thankful. Kaga is merciless.

Not really, as the mission is "defeat commander", but yeah. It's difficult to do so without going out of your way, and even then that's experience you're missing out on.

Baby steps, baby steps.

I see. Another reason why I'm complaining to Nintendo about not making the games more available.

They're ashamed that they had to swindle a swindler because they had no other ideas.

Agreed there. It's just something I never understood was a recurring element when it's rarely interesting.

It's understandable, but to be fair, it's given more of a focus here than it is, usually.

I am never a fan that, no matter the game.

Agreed, I will not defend that.

Please do.

I did what I could.

Glad to hear.

What do you mean, "glad to hear"? I just told you I'd disappoint you! Were you so blinded by your rage, you failed to read what I said correctly?

No. I just want to see his face skinned, fed his intestines, his bones stabbed into him...

You think too highly of me.

Somebody had to do it.

Damn you for being the one!

I think I was thinking that his superior was Pavlov.

Ah, well, makes sorta sense.

Ye. And he was one of the few dictators that supported the Nazi's that wasn't executed after the war because of it.

And I see what you mean by it being a national issue. Reminds me of the "statues of slave owners" thing in the US that shows how little people refuse to see the whole picture with history.

Frankly (heh), I can understand that the families of the victims wouldn't want a bunch of people saluting Franco's grave right next to them while they mourn the people he killed, but... is it really the most pressing issue in our country? Do we really need the TV to be talking about it every single day? Well, of course we do, because if we didn't have a distraction, we might actually realize that everyone in power is a corrupt asshole.

Excellent point.

You can't say excellent without "Eugen". What, excellent isn't pronounced "Eugenellent"? Stupid English and its shenanigans...

For better and worse.

Or both!

I was thinking of making a Donnel joke, but Donnel is too awesome to be compared to that scumbag. If anything, I want that villager to kick this slimeballs ass.

...And the killer Instinct Ultra Combos, and maybe screenshots of Lugaru...

Oof.

Image result for death glare

Those are the eyes of a man who doesn't know what's coming, only that he won't like it.

Glad to hear it!

Right!

Interesting. Never got far enough in Sacred Stones to see whether or not they were any good. Strange that it's enemy only, though.

It's just like Valkyries, really. Mounted mages, nothing more to them. In this game they tend to have really bad bases, though, I don't know why.

Sounds... overpowered, yet awesome.

It is awesome.

And for some reason, I was reminded of McFlurries when I first read the skill name. Do they make mint McFlurries?

Why, you little...!

Something tells me he's either recruitable later on, or he's optional to fight.

We'll just have to wait and see.

I can see the use of having flags. To bad they don't come in different colors, as then they could have even more utility.

I'd have liked that, but something tells me I'd only use the green flags forever.

Right! I forgot to comment on the Runan dance last time! We need to find fitting music for it!

Anyway, does this prove that memetic dances are a thing in this universe?

Nothing. They just dance to the sounds of people dying and screaming for help and their mommies as they bleed out. Pretty sure that what Runan does, anyway. With a big, bright smile on his face!

It was at around this point that, after three days of working on the replies alone and Serenes just eating my progress, I looked upon your and Dayni's bibles and my eye twitched a little. Forgive me if my replies seem a lot shorter from here on out, I was determined to finish this within ten minutes so I could start copying dialogue already.

I take back what I said last time. Maybe they really are lightsabers, but not as overpowered.

They can only really cut through swords, not flesh.

Dramatic is the right word for that. It's a pretty cool quote.

I suppose so. The Wild O is very epic.

Good thing Billford is a knight. Although the inn lady would now know he's lying about what he said earlier if she happened to see that.

Ah, affordable losses. 'Sides, she doesn't have to know.

That might be grounds for a lawsuit if that happened today.

Alas...

Have you any idea what he went through while this game was being developed? Given Nintendo's army of lawyers was forever waiting at his door for him to come out, if he was sued for that, he'd just laugh it up.

That is an awesome animation. Almost looks like Runan has force lightning.

He definitely does have the smile of a Sith.

Two things:

Myrmidons hold their swords like katans properly.

The reviving end of the Levin sword is awesome.

I don't understand what you mean by "reviving end".

Giving credit where credit is due, you did last longer than anyone expected.

After my last LPs, I cannot blame you for betting against me.

Also, Runan's death face with a smile just screams "see you in hell".

I thought it was fitting.

Eugens reaction seems more fitting if casual mode were a thing in this game.

Huh, so it just asks you if you want to retry the map? That's convenient, although it means it can't continue Fire Emblems reputation for the occasionally creepy game over screens.

Why would there be a creepy game over screen? Eugen's here, he won't let it happen.

The invaders aren't a b?

Is this now an edutainment show?

Billford, the Wild O.

Are these two now the hosts of a PBS show or something in this alternative universe?

And now, Billford and Sharon barge in to teach the kids all about the alphabet in THE WILD O'S SHOW!

I only cringed a little.

That's, uh, one way to blow off steam.

Not a very good one, but eh...

Billford is "Generic Knight #I'm-Not-Bothering-To-Count", isn't he?

More or less, yes. Except instead of milord, it's milady. And hislady isn't even really his liege.

That... is a very needlessly elaborate way of making a joke unit.

Sucks too. Some parts about Billford sound genuinely useful.

What does sound useful, exactly? The 3 move with a very tiny chance of improving? The really late skills? The bad bases?

Damn it. Retract my earlier statement about the lawsuit.

Skipping right past to the electric chair, then?

Sounds like what is supposed to be a simple step (let character get to destination, and then you can recruit them) is made pointlessly complicated and needlessly punishing.

That sounds like backwards design. Granted, I can understand it from the viewpoint of "if the player can get their in 10 turns, then they don't need this unit", but that is still punishing rather than rewarding the player for doing well.

It is a huge dick-move.

...I have nothing against you.

Wee! I'm not gonna get killed!

Kaga, on the other hand...

Oh no...

No... no... no...

I'll... get out of the way before the inevitable explosion occurs.

And the bastards are exploiting that trope, aren't they?

Yup. That they are.

I feel ya. One of the faces in KOTOR 2 is pretty much me without glasses and facial hair. And considering what you can do in that game...

Killing yourself was never so much fun!

On a side note, Story!Ruben looks much better than this guy, and part of me what's him to punch the daylights out of this bastard.

That could be arranged... a little out of character for him, but... we'll see.

Plum, run away! Remember the lessons about stranger danger?

...She was never taught about stranger danger, was she?

Certainly doesn't seem like it.

Would you kindly skin this bastard when you kill him? Please?

...This is how you get the dancer in this game?

...Slay the fucker...

...And this is the part were it's too late...

...

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(I would have put one of his fatalities, but the gif didn't show the whole thing).

...Kill them both...

...and don't even think about the word "mercy" when you do so...

I believe saying something would only make things worse, so I won't add anything to this. Also, I'm in a "cut as many corners as possible" mood, as I said earlier.

If it weren't against the law, I would have caved Kagas face in for that.

Even if it doesn't happen in the story, kill those sons of bitches. Bloodily.

Once again, I doubt my limited editing skills will suffice to sate your bloodlust.

And you'd better save her when the time comes.

I will save her, thankfully it's really easy to do. Nah, the hard part comes afterwards...

If that's the case, then the Lego Mayor has no spine or morality.

"Then"? His town is full to the brim with thieves, murderers and kidnappers while he sits on his square ass and lets Pavlov rob him and his peers blind! He never had a spine! Probably doesn't even know what a spine is!

For some reason, I am reminded of whenever I play Pirates!

Ah yes. I remember that part. I love that game, and I need to play it again. I was (and am) legitimately good at the game, and didn't need to resort to any dirty tricks to stay afloat financially. Heck, I even bought and maintained the Level 5 house until the game was over.

I was in the same situation. A shame, I never got to experience all the "terrible hardships" and "moral dilemmas" everyone was talking about, I was rich the whole way through, so I could afford to do all the good deeds I was given the chance to!

Dang. Are they as stingy with the other promotion items in the game, or just this one?

Just this one.

He probably was, and apparently no one told him what a bad idea the whole thing was.

Kaga does not like being blind player friendly, does he?

Not at all.

Nice. A little pointless nowadays considering that the removed class exclusive promotions, but it seems helpful in games with them.

This is one of 'em, so it's good. Still, where are my growth rates, Kaga?

Thou art forgiving. And it seems you managed to present a glitch we didn't know about in the process. That's neat.

I'm pretty sure it's a rather well-known glitch amongst those who play this game. The LTC pros use it to nab Mintz without sacrificing too many turns, I believe.

Both. Kill them all.

Violently.

Okay, okay, calm down, I promise I will.

I can see why they gave him the flurry skill now. They really want you to use him.

If it leads to more moments like these, then they did their job.

Mintz has to be a strong contender for my favourite playable character of this game. Lee's amazing and all, but so is Mintz and he has a killer personality to boot!

Mintz, for better or worse, probably wants to humiliate Pavlov first before killing the bastard. To bad this game doesn't have more animated cutscenes, for that could have been a sight to see.

The tables turned quickly.

Even so, that "probably" was epic. Pavlov's dignity was at -100 even after he got rescued.

And so will we.

Ruben, you are luckily unlucky to catch stuff like this.

In-universe, I'm blaming the flash from the critical attack.

That's probably it.

Overkill him, would you kindly?

You keep on expecting things of me that I really cannot do.

Please do.

This, though, I could do!

Took the words right out of my mouth.

They did a good job with that sprite.

Eh, not as violent as I was picturing, but that just means I can use my imagination that Runan did this:

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Image result for kung lao brutality gif

 

I told you a thousand times, I was never going to be able to do much! The worst thing I could think of is beheading him, but decapitation's like the F word on TV: I can only use it once. In FE12 it was Nyna, in FE6 it was Merlinus, and here... who knows! I'll have to see if I can find my plates...

Ah, so he does leave.

Not a bad way to explain why Ernst has to go. It helps reinforce his trustworthiness as a person and might as a soldier.

I really like it, myself. It gives him some more characterization, instead of some generic just going "Ernst go back so player can win".

Wait, so how do you trigger it?

By entering the grasslands. Simple, but most people going in blind wouldn't be so quick to ignore all the blatant warnings.

Agreed. Is this a call back to the Gold Knights of Gaiden?

There are Gold Paladins in this game, which are basically the exact same thing (you may not have noticed, but Ernst was one of them), so I think they just liked the way golden armor looked.

I don't know why, but the helmet just makes them look goofy in a fun way.

It's like they're saying "Yes, my armor is purple and pink. Shut up."

I think it's blond hair, actually.

Phew. What a level. I can see why you said this would be the most infamous part of the game.

With hope, those bastards will get what's coming to them.

Patience, my friend. Patience.

 

On 10/1/2019 at 12:40 AM, Dayni said:

Well what can I say except

giphy.webp

Great, the reply starts with something that doesn't work.

Sorry, that's my fault. I've always misspelled the word and it being a German loan word doesn't excuse that.

Don't worry about it, I forgive you.

Hey, Kagero and her weapon are useable.

Who cares, I don't want no fanservice on my team!

...nah, really, I just don't care about her because I don't know anything at all about her beyond Tities, so... besides, I wasn't given any Kageros, I'm pretty sure.

And units like Matthew are also daggers. Usually thieves ended up getting them.

And then I went and made my team almost all Mages.

If it gave SS Seth, I'd agree.

Heroes Seth must be a new recruit in comparison, sadly.

Hey, he carried my all-Mage team hard.

I'm not so surprised that's happening, I think they're coming to a point where it's harder for newer people to get into the game. Which is an absolute shame, because it wasn't like this last year.

On top of that, that's some real shoddy design right there if it can't account for that, but I think the assumption is that you'd get a team trained up beforehand.

Which isn't made easier by 1. exp gain being "upgradeable" by spending orbs (That probably should be fixed actually, I should send feedback as that being a way to improve newcomer's experience), 2. newer players not having teams trained up and there being no guarantee that there'd be a way for them to face a fair level of challenge in AR (level wise, some of these raids are horrible by design). That's pretty bad actually, I should mention this somewhere.

A shame, but if it gives them the money and motivation to keep this series rolling, I'll be happy.

But is it heavy metal or christian rock? I don't think we can tell with this cover.

She just blares into the mic about how she loves stabbing hearts, cutting throats and beheading enemies with her dear fellow psychopath, Smiley Runan!

Literally only have bows, which while dangerous, can be more easily dealt with by Sasha..

I'm pretty sure I'd remember if TRS has rocket propelled ammunition.

Still, don't jinx it, don't jinx it...

>Not much of a Disney Kid

Alright, sure. I was most definitely one though.

>Only watched Lion King last year.

Heresy.

Come now, I did say I've watched it, right?

I was using Alejandro a bit jokingly, but still.

Gibberish? GIBBERISH! I'll have no such insults.

You will have them. Those names make no sense!

Niamh has the i pronounced like an e and mh is essentially a v sound in Irish, so "Neeav" would be pretty accurate. Naoise... that one actually gets me, as I'd pronounce it as "nee-sha" but it's this. Saorise is a bit notorious for some people but the only tricky part is the ao, which is pretty easily resolved when you realise saor is a word in Irish (free) and it's the same pronunciation. I would say that, but the "ao" is more commonly pronounced "eo". This is what happens when you have generations of foreign names get used more and more and the language die in relevance for many reasons.

And then you failed miserably to defend your case. Hah! Outclassed!

Well that's another one for me.

I haven't played GBA FE in a while honestly.

Dew it.

I mean, I think he owes me for that.

Eugen owes nobody nothing. If anything, you owe him for existing.

I'm pretty sure he wouldn't be reckless enough to turn into a dragon in a place where the populace would be utterly terrified.

Right?

Except he doesn't like to transform.

Or he could do this.

Ah, Jojo's. My friend who doesn't watch anime watches this with my friend who watches anime. I can't say it piques my interest, honestly. It seems like nothing but a bunch of memes and white noise. I'm going to get hate for that statement, aren't I...

He didn't deserve the whip either but he was still almost made an acquaintance of it.

Gah, stop it!

I wasn't thinking base for it, but still.

That's a large pile of nope atop a destrier of nope.

Ernost.

I mean, considering Billford's white knight status and Raffin having a bad boy history to him (shush), I'm not surprised.

But he was excited to hear Raffin was here... or maybe he was just mad and contained himself because Sharon likes him.

HE HAS THE POW- I'll stop.

I've got better.

I agree, that's better.

Oh no, the Ironman's over.

Pack it up, we're done here-

I guess not.

Eugen saved the LP.

Raffin hears those words and realises that all his mistakes were coming back to haunt him.

He probably feared for his knockers.

She does get Flurry.

Really late so.

Bravo, a lord who can pick up bases.

Still worrying about his defence(s), I don't remember this being a game for dodgetanking.

It's not as hilariously easy on dodgetanks like the GBA titles, but it isn't quite as bad as DSFE. More of a middle ground.

Use the meme?

No? Okay.

Maybe I will only so I can call him the Wild O all LP through.

The pun ruins the pronunciation.

Who the fuck cares? I don't. In fact, I'll do it again: my puns will only be bad the day cows go Leeeeeeee!

Criticalee ruining imo.

...I... okay, you win this round.

Yep, this moment..... Can we hope that we don't get this kind of choice again?

We can only hope.

She knows what Enteh is.

Perceptive.

She does have good eyes, according to Bill.

Well, maybe she's been ducking into cover as she moves hoping to avoid detection.

Why'd she walk into a pub and start drinking milk, then?

She's also very naive, so it could lead to this.

Question answered.

That still doesn't explain the player's actions.

Efficient, that's what explains the player's actions.

That's awkward to hear about someone referred to as a "very nice man"

Is there something you're not telling us?

A few things, but nothing too bad. Do not attempt to find out more. I assure you, everything is fine~

It really wasn't out there by this point.

That being said, this man is absolutely terrible. And that comparison he says is disgusting. Just, fuck 'im.

We'll have to see.

I'd say nuke it from orbit, but they don't have that. Or Katri's dragon form.

Where's yer man when you need him?

We do have the Leedoukens. Could've tried, but coding the house as a unit would've been hard.

There's plenty of times I wonder if Kaga got QA on his games.

This seems to indicate that they at least were kind of done that day to not catch this.

He might've had at some point, but they probably quit at around the point when he decided to hide Norton's recruitability under a pile of red flags for the lolz.

OKAY THAT'S IT I HAD TRIED TO AVOID REFERENCING FROLLO.

BUT IF YOU'RE NOT TRYING PAVLOV NEITHER AM I.

(Hell, Mintz is a perfect Quasimodo.)

Ergh... he looks tall and he's handsome, so... wouldn't say perfect.

How did he get captured?

HOW?

EoGrgeJ.png

Eeeeeyyyy it's that sprite I made in FE6! One of those that was actually decent!

Pavlov had enough money left after the cult to pay the healer.

Corrupt piece of...

Kate's getting pretty solid.

Right? I'm really proud of her.

Shame your mages aren't as consistent.

Eh, they're all right.

Defence would be nice, though he at least isn't looking slow.

Quite the contrary.

Well, I would say the thing, but I don't think I need to.

He's just great. 'Nuff said.

Bye Sharon, you.... tried?

No. She did not.

Narron could have been as good, but this guy'll make Dougy look bad. I am okay with this.

Oh my God, Dougy hate again? No!

 

On 10/1/2019 at 2:32 AM, Ruminant said:

If Eugen has the power to revive the dead, then why does he only use it on game over characters? Is he so powerful he can afford to just toy with us?

He feels he needs to make things interesting, since this war's already over thanks to his powers.

Given he can bring back the deceased, who knows what other sort of power he has in store...

Ah, we'll see, perhaps...

The way I described Norton back when he joined (as a unit with unique traits that ultimately aren't that useful) seems to be much more fitting of Billford. A movement growth (that's only 5%, so having it proc enough to be meaningful is unlikely); a solid spread of other growths (aside from a huge Mastery lead, his bases are barely any better than Norton's, not to mention the level/availability differences); an array of useful skills (only available at high levels). While +10 Hit and Crit at base is a helpful attribute, Norton's superior promoted movement (which I may have undersold at first, because I wasn't aware of how much experience the Entombed give in this game and therefore overestimated how hard it was to get Norton to promotion) still makes him out to be a better tank option.

Yeah, if you're going to use a Knight in this game, I feel like the objective ranking goes Guy We Haven't Met > Norton > Billford. Norton does require a bit of favouritism early, if he takes too long to promote he's fucked.

TLP but everything is the same except Siegfried is replaced by Lee.

I'd like to see that.

Wouldn't mind a game with Lee as one of the lords to be honest, he seems like a pretty cool guy.

A game with an overpowered Bishop as the Lord? Sign me right up!

Reminds me of how FE7 punishes you for playing Pale Flower of Darkness quickly by giving you Karel instead of the superior-in-every-way-that-matters Harken.

More or less, yes.

Just going to summarize my thoughts on that scene by saying why did Kaga think any of that was a good idea? It's bad enough that the game gives you the option to let a 15-year-old girl get drugged, kidnapped and probably sold into sex slavery, but the fact that it rewards you for doing so is just... ugh.

The age of consent in Japan is 13, but the game still acknowledges the fact that Plum's effectively a child. A child you need to send to slavery for a dancer. I... yeah, I can't defend this. Not that I would want to, either. A part of me loves how absolutely brutal and reckless the whole thing is, but... jeez.

Needless to say I won't be doing this when I get around to playing this game.

I cannot blame you.

Mintz has ceased being relatable, he's too cool in this scene.

Even if he still ended up captured by the end of it, but that's not the point...

He wasn't counting on Eritz's brother being there, I guess.

 

On 10/1/2019 at 4:53 AM, Franp3 said:

Well, obviously, Eugen is an extremely powerful wizard, so powerful in fact, he can communicate with the dead, though time and parallel universes. Read the lore.

I've heard there's something crazy like three books of this game. Also, I've heard that this and Berwick outsold the Tellius games in Japan. I don't know any of these things for sure, but if it is true... damn. Fuckin' Kaga, man.

I honestly fail to see any purpose in the moneybag mechanic. Could somebody enlighten me?

It's there because Kaga hates it when things are straightforward.

Bilford, the wild O. Now i'm never calling him anything else.

Dude, I'm starting to feel like using him only so I can say things like "the wild O kills!".

all the puns

You're worse than Mad-Manakete. Return to the hole you came from!

No.

And I make one pun and you dare say such a thing? Why, you...! I'm going to kill your favourite character from this game, whenever you find him or her!

That is the most Kaga paragraph i've ever read.

...I'm excited and terrified in equal parts.

Ain't it just beautiful?

Plum, you must be the stupidest character in any FE game, official or otherwise

Sadly, yes.

Headcanon: The enemy doesn't take damage from the spell, but from the embarrassment of being hit with such a stupid-looking attack.

I accept this as LP canon.

Their idle frames makes them look like they're staring into your soul.

That they do. I wonder what's up with that... let me take a closer look...

SpGLcK8.png

Oh God!

Wonderful.

I guess...

I'm saving that portrait for future use.

I made it, so give me credit, props and praise, will you?

 

On 10/1/2019 at 8:37 AM, Mad-manakete said:

Never shelled out for the DLC. Well except returning characters. When Smash Ultimate was announced, I knew I made the right choice.

Eh, I did enjoy myself playing Lucas and Roy. No regrets here, for the most part.

Well to be fair, Jesus had a jewish mother and earthly father. Seems like the sort of thing Hitler would do.

Oh, Jesus!

Cue in the Seinfield theme.

I used to have faith in one party over the other. Not so much these days. I am smart enough to know I benefit from the current regime going out based on some proposed plans. But other than that it doesn't matter half as much as it used to.

I'm tired of talking about politics, and I'm also sick of replying, so let's move right on. Sorry.

It's a good thing Lee is an honest man or this could end diabolicalee

Leethal.

Ack... that's it, I'm leemiting you to three lines per post. You're just using your longer posts as an excuse to shit out multiple puns, and that is just unacceptablee excessive.

A better The Roger the Paladin? Poor bastard is even outclassed when he's good.

Eh, he's still good, and he's still got the charm of being The Roger the Paladin.

"I HAVE THE POWER"

Dayni had enough restraint not to do it, but you, on the other hand...

BY THE POWER OF SPLITSKULL...
2ZUQD6m.png

The Barlowe facepalm!

The Eugen is God meme looks more plausible now. I mean Eugen just tells Runan to clear his mind of distractions (like that hammer and bits of skull) and he's good to go again.

Eugen probably can lift a sword, he just doesn't feel like it. I mean, he can just revive Runan over and over, why bother?

Sad, because it looks like he could have actually been good if he came at a different time. Especially if that movement growth hit more times than was likely.

Chapter 1 would've been more reasonable for him, especially considering he barely has any leads on base Norton.

So I've been using your address on internet surveys for years. Good to know.

Hwahahaha, awesome.

I was thinking he looks like Stromboli from Pinnochio. Come to think of it that's kind of similar circumstances in that he keeps Pinnochio in a cage and makes him sing and dance for money.... and Stromboli is one of the rare Disney villains that get away with no comeuppance... Stromboli? Is that you?

I think I watched Pinnochio when I was like, 5. I can't remember anything.

O4FKLTV.png Also did I mention I am not a cat?

I, uh... what?

Worse, I already used my cornflakes joke about Runan's smile, so I can't even diffuse the situation with it. Seriously, if I sold that Frollo valentines day card, this town would probably be my number one buyer.
Hell at Christmas they probably post this and it's not even a typo for them (and no, I don't know whose post it is either). Zr8yH8R.png

This is the town where every game of mafia ever takes place. Everyone's a criminal and the ones who aren't are dumb as bricks.

Missed chance. You should have just put an "assist trophy" in his portrait box

Except I don't really give much of a damn about Waluigi, so...

You mean criticalee

STOP!

 

On 10/1/2019 at 10:04 AM, Mad-manakete said:

Pardon the double post... but I just realized I pre-empted that tavern scene unintentionally. Turns out my jokes re-write reality.

More Lee puns, is it?

The joke about Runan's smile is particularly telling.

Indeed.

As is the milk... that turns out to be...

Drugged. Almost exactly like my earlier joke. Now I feel like I accidentally caused this. I shudder to think on the consequences of my Martel jokes.

If anything comes out of that, I'll kill you. You may mark my words.

 

Updates:

Spoiler

Last time, a lot of terrible shit happened. This time, less terrible shit will happen.

SMo6BfB.png

0zFk3fj.png Why is he an "enemy knight", though? He never tried to fight us at all, he went straight for Pavlov!

tN4k68u.pngVery well, bring him here.

vUN6DQJ.pngYes, Sir.

anSSDM4.png

tN4k68u.pngI am. And you are?

twhnfrc.pngMintz, of the Black Knights of Canaan.

tN4k68u.pngThe Black Knights?

vUN6DQJ.pngThe personal forces of Prince Arless... At least they were, before his untimely death at the hands of Mousa. Their strength is renowned in Canaan.

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twhnfrc.pngPah, those Gerxel lunatics have it in for anyone loyal to the old regime. I assure you, it's all lies.

0zFk3fj.png Sounds like something Gerxel would do. Or any evil organization ever, at that. Like modern governments.

tN4k68u.pngMintz, is there something you wanted to talk to me about?

twhnfrc.pngNope.

vUN6DQJ.pngWhy, you...! Get outta here!

xQunKTk.png Okay, okay, I jest, I jest.

twhnfrc.pngFor years, I have placed my honor as a knight of Canaan above all else. But that's simply not possible anymore... So, Runan, will you hire me as one of your mercenaries?

xQunKTk.png I like how he casually refers to him as "Runan".

vUN6DQJ.pngLord Runan, I strongly advise against accepting this man's offer.

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twhnfrc.pngStop spewing nonsense, you old coot! Sure, mercenary work isn't the highest of callings, but I'd never betray my homeland!

vUN6DQJ.pngI don't understand what you mean. The Zoa Empire is our sword enemy. If you work for us as a mercenary, you will have to fight against the Empire! If that isn't betrayal, then what is?

twhnfrc.pngMy loyalty is not to the Empire. I was born in the kingdom of Canaan, and my loyalty remains with Prince Arless.

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0zFk3fj.png On the one hand, Eugen's coming dangerously close to Merlinus's levels of being unreasonably paranoid, because it's painfully obvious what Mintz means to say.

hTMofYU.png But on the other hand, he's doing it with so much style, I can't help but love it.

tN4k68u.pngNo, Eugen, I think I understand what he is trying to say. Mintz... You want to return Canaan to the way it was before the Empire, right? To overthrow the Cult of Gerxel?

twhnfrc.pngYou got it. I've got my personal reasons, too, but that about sums it up.

tN4k68u.pngSay no more. I'll hire you, Knight of Arless. Lend us your strength!

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xQunKTk.png Great, new unit! I'll show him off when I can.

 

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tN4k68u.pngOh, that man... Such a pleasant fellow, wasn't he? No, I'd better see what he wants...

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tN4k68u.pngDo you need something, Sir Mayor?

qaRBlgC.pngThe Council of Senay has come to a decision regarding the matter we discussed earlier, and therefore as chairman of the council, I have come to inform you...

O1Or9E1.png

hTMofYU.png Hahahahahahahahah, amazing! You're so awesome sometimes, Runan. Not quite all the time like Eugen, but you're getting there, you're still young.

qaRBlgC.pngOh, my deepest apologies, Lord Runan. The Free City of Senay will give their full support to the Champions of Yutona.

tN4k68u.pngChampions of... Yutona? Whom exactly are you referring to?

qaRBlgC.pngSurely the news has reached you, Lord Runan? I'm referring to Prince Richard and Princess Tia's Western Alliance and your own Reeve-Wellt Alliance, joined together to battle the Zoa Empire, of course! "Those who remain loyal to the Goddess must stand together against the servants of the god of darkness!" Surely you have heard this before?

tN4k68u.pngI can't say I have... is that from the scriptures?

qaRBlgC.pngNo, those were the words of His Highness Prince Richard that he gave at Mahl Palace! "All ye who have not forgotten the legacy of the Goddess, join us, her champions, and fight against the tyranny of Zoa!"

0zFk3fj.png No typos there, Richard really did say "ye" according to this guy. I don't know who embodies the "me, an intellectual" meme more, Richard or the mayor.

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qaRBlgC.pngEr... Hahaha! Yes, I suppose you could say that!

hTMofYU.png Never mind that, it's time for Eugen to blow this guy to pieces. Oof! Guess the mayor now knows how it feels to step on him!

qaRBlgC.pngI'm afraid Senay does not employ an army, but we have inquired among our mercenary guards, and these two have volunteered. Please let them join your service.

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l9X3N1M.pngI am prepared to fight to the end to take back my homeland. Please, let me join you!

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nFVZz2V.pngI'd like nothing better than to put those imperial bastards in their place, so please, let Lady Sharon and me join your ranks!

0zFk3fj.png Wait, what? What's this? They already joined us! Not to mention, we killed every single one of your mercenaries! Are you daft, mayorman? Yes, you are, but are you also blind not to see that you were speaking to a bunch of bodies? Well, I cannot see your eyes under those oversized chunks of forehead, so, could be... ah, forget it, I don't know why I even questioned the logic behind Legomayor being the worst thing ever.

qaRBlgC.pngAnd finally, Lord Runan, as a token of our support, know that the gates of Senay will always be open to the Champions of Yutona.

xQunKTk.png What this means is that they'll be throwing a party in our name, which leads to some supportive moments!

0zFk3fj.png Not sure I'd want to eat dinner at this town, though, much less a banquet, but oh well... it's not like the scumbags that crawl around this shithole could hurt our juggernauts or anything.

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xQunKTk.png First, Norton and Kate! That's rather unexpected, but I will not complain!

kkXZfYc.pngHe's probably in his room. He doesn't really like crowds.

O93jT9f.pngIs that so...? Kate, what do you see in that Zieg guy?

kkXZfYc.pngHe's not "that Zieg guy", he's just Zieg. And what do you care, anyway?

O93jT9f.pngHe cannot be trusted, Kate! A Shadow Knight betraying the Empire with some sob story excuse? It's fishy, I tell you! I'm sure Lord Runan feels it, too. If he doesn't go running back to the Empire by this war's end, I'll eat my helmet.

xQunKTk.png Two things. First, it's funny how Norton could potentially not be promoted at this point, which would mean he'd have no helmet to eat. Second... this is Norton's theme right know. Just this.

oIE7E9n.png

0zFk3fj.png Meanwhile, this is Kate and Zieg's theme.

O93jT9f.pngAnd you think you do?

kkXZfYc.pngMore than you or Lord Runan do, clearly!

O93jT9f.pngKate, I just don't want to see you get hurt by some smooth-talking guy, especially one that used to be with Gerxel...

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kkXZfYc.pngHe knew that leaving would mean his family would die, but he chose to fight for good! You don't... None of you understand what he's had to live through...

0zFk3fj.png Scratch that, actually, that theme isn't dramatic enough. Ergh... this one might do the trick.

O93jT9f.pngHey, hey... All right, I'm sorry! I shouldn't have said what I did! Please stop crying...

IfRBMws.png Oh shit, he made her cry! Norton's new theme is this!

kkXZfYc.pngJust leave me alone...

0zFk3fj.png That was awkward... the really clever part about it is that now Norton gets a support from Kate, but not the other way around. Very fitting. Now, let's see if the next supportive moment is more supportive.

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kkXZfYc.pngPrincess Sasha... Is something the matter?

Qd8087b.pngNo, but... Since there's tons of wine here, it's okay if I have a little bit, right? Just enough to feel what it's like?

kkXZfYc.pngAbsolutely not! You are underage, and a princess at that. I cannot allow you embarrass(sic) yourself and your father's good name with drunkenness.

0zFk3fj.png I think I just suffered a bit of whiplash there...

Qd8087b.pngC'mon, I'll be fine!

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U8ZKzY4.pngDon't be such a worrywart, Kate! Aww, this is no different from how it was back at the palace! Meanie...

0zFk3fj.png A part of me finds this scene hilarious, but the fact that Kate's dealing with some severe emotional issues (and Norton's not helping) while Sasha remains completely oblivious to her troubles is rather worrying.

 

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SUlAGUQ.png9s52mtg.png

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xQunKTk.png Next up is the obvious one. Also the last one.

l9X3N1M.pngI want to return this flute to you. There's an old friend flying around who misses you dearly, but he can hardly come down and see you when you're inside, can he?

J3ntLLJ.pngThis is the flute I used to call Garuda! He flew all the way here?

l9X3N1M.pngYes, he's circling above us now. He hasn't stopped moping since you left.

0he1UXN.png

xQunKTk.png Oohh, boy, a choice! We can either give in to Sharon's guilt trap and "get a flute" (you don't often see Engrish in Aethin's translation, but there are remnants of it here and there), or we can have Raffin wave his old life goodbye for good and refuse. Since I'm not using Raffin, all this'll really affect is the endings, so let's play Shipping Emblem: do we screw over Sharon and have Raffin accept his new life as the son of Marlon, or do we make Esther's worst fears come true and have him abandon his new life to return to his old lover?

Of course, if I was using Raffin, this'd be a really mindless choice, because he promotes to Wyvern Knight if you have him accept the flute. Yeah, he promotes from Paladin to Wyvern Knight, and unlike the game's Pegasus Knights, he doesn't lose anything from it, not even magic or speed. The drawback is that you don't actually get a flute, so you can't just go "okay, I'll choose yes and then hand Garuda over to Martel" or something. You either promote Raffin or do nothing. I actually used Raffin all game once without promoting him. It was fun, to say the least.

But like I said earlier, I'm not using Raffin and I doubt I ever will, so pick your choice. Pretty sure I know what the result will be, but hey, I want to give my favourite mod a chance to defend her favourite character. And with that, it is time for me to go. Next time, something interesting. Be sure to be punctual! Farewell, and goodbye!

Death count: --

Reset count: 1 (Runan: 1)

 

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On 1/10/2019 at 3:53 AM, Franp3 said:

Wonderful.

Sometimes I reallee try.

(Not there though)

On 1/10/2019 at 3:53 AM, Franp3 said:

I'm saving that portrait for future use.

That's from the BB LP.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Who cares, I don't want no fanservice on my team!

...nah, really, I just don't care about her because I don't know anything at all about her beyond Tities, so... besides, I wasn't given any Kageros, I'm pretty sure.

Shame, she's a pretty decent budget unit.

Her alts, on the other hand, are made to sell orbs. I didn't spend any on them but that's because I got lucky with one and didn't bother with the other. (Also yes, she has as many forms as there are Whitewings and three times as many as characters from the Western Isles in Heroes)

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hey, he carried my all-Mage team hard.

1. That sounds like a contradiction.

2. At least someone did.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

She just blares into the mic about how she loves stabbing hearts, cutting throats and beheading enemies with her dear fellow psychopath, Smiley Runan!

Now it's how she sings it that would make it clear.

Smiley Runan is just sitting in the back playing the bass away.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Come now, I did say I've watched it, right?

It's not enough.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

And then you failed miserably to defend your case. Hah! Outclassed!

I picked actual hard ones. And Niamh.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Dew it.

Do a Dew solo in Genealogy?

Nah, I've got a lot of things going on. Also Tellius to play.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ah, Jojo's. My friend who doesn't watch anime watches this with my friend who watches anime. I can't say it piques my interest, honestly. It seems like nothing but a bunch of memes and white noise. I'm going to get hate for that statement, aren't I...

I know it entirely for memes, I haven't seen any of it.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I agree, that's better.

Using that every time then?

Do you know what that's from?

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Maybe I will only so I can call him the Wild O all LP through.

So, sports personality The Wild O?

What, did he work in Barge as a newscaster before it got taken?

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

We can only hope.

I mean beyond TearRing honestly.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

He might've had at some point, but they probably quit at around the point when he decided to hide Norton's recruitability under a pile of red flags for the lolz.

He's not that far off, he's like Arden and Roger's grandson.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Ergh... he looks tall and he's handsome, so... wouldn't say perfect.

I did say Quasimodo but perfect.

He still got Leonie sanctuary.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Eeeeeyyyy it's that sprite I made in FE6! One of those that was actually decent!

I'm more amazed I forgot to use it in that LP.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh my God, Dougy hate again? No!

Yes, Again!

Go Norton! Show that having a horse makes a difference!

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png Why is he an "enemy knight", though?

He's in the Black Knights of Canann, so he's still suspect.

To Eugen that is.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png On the one hand, Eugen's coming dangerously close to Merlinus's levels of being unreasonably paranoid, because it's painfully obvious what Mintz means to say.

hTMofYU.png But on the other hand, he's doing it with so much style, I can't help but love it.

As I am with Albertus, you are with Eugen. :P

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

qaRBlgC.pngThe Council of Senay has come to a decision regarding the matter we discussed earlier, and therefore as chairman of the council, I have come to inform you...

O1Or9E1.png

Runan decided after killing their overlord that he's just done with Senay.

I don't blame him.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

qaRBlgC.pngNo, those were the words of His Highness Prince Richard that he gave at Mahl Palace! "All ye who have not forgotten the legacy of the Goddess, join us, her champions, and fight against the tyranny of Zoa!"

0zFk3fj.png No typos there, Richard really did say "ye" according to this guy. I don't know who embodies the "me, an intellectual" meme more, Richard or the mayor.

Richard has always been about standing out.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0ROqoZ9.png

qaRBlgC.pngEr... Hahaha! Yes, I suppose you could say that!

I'm pretty sure Dolcellan is dead after that.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

O93jT9f.pngHe cannot be trusted, Kate! A Shadow Knight betraying the Empire with some sob story excuse? It's fishy, I tell you! I'm sure Lord Runan feels it, too. If he doesn't go running back to the Empire by this war's end, I'll eat my helmet.

The enemy Arden is more relevant than royals in BB.

Man BB was a mistake.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png Scratch that, actually, that theme isn't dramatic enough. Ergh... this one might do the trick.

I mean, on the one hand it's supposed to be dramatic.

On the other hand, the game it's from is considered a train wreck and that.... I could say many things on that.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Qd8087b.pngNo, but... Since there's tons of wine here, it's okay if I have a little bit, right? Just enough to feel what it's like?

kkXZfYc.pngAbsolutely not! You are underage, and a princess at that. I cannot allow you embarrass(sic) yourself and your father's good name with drunkenness.

kkXZfYc.png"If need be I'll drink it all to make sure you don't!"

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png A part of me finds this scene hilarious, but the fact that Kate's dealing with some severe emotional issues (and Norton's not helping) while Sasha remains completely oblivious to her troubles is rather worrying.

Yeah. I made it worse by making a joke about her drinking to forget Norton's accusation.

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

EElVVaD.pngXlDeQdW.pngyLGhjPi.png

When will Lyria give Ruben a nickname?

2 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

xQunKTk.png Oohh, boy, a choice! We can either give in to Sharon's guilt trap and "get a flute" (you don't often see Engrish in Aethin's translation, but there are remnants of it here and there), or we can have Raffin wave his old life goodbye for good and refuse. Since I'm not using Raffin, all this'll really affect is the endings, so let's play Shipping Emblem: do we screw over Sharon and have Raffin accept his new life as the son of Marlon, or do we make Esther's worst fears come true and have him abandon his new life to return to his old lover?

Of course, if I was using Raffin, this'd be a really mindless choice, because he promotes to Wyvern Knight if you have him accept the flute. Yeah, he promotes from Paladin to Wyvern Knight, and unlike the game's Pegasus Knights, he doesn't lose anything from it, not even magic or speed. The drawback is that you don't actually get a flute, so you can't just go "okay, I'll choose yes and then hand Garuda over to Martel" or something. You either promote Raffin or do nothing. I actually used Raffin all game once without promoting him. It was fun, to say the least.

But like I said earlier, I'm not using Raffin and I doubt I ever will, so pick your choice. Pretty sure I know what the result will be, but hey, I want to give my favourite mod a chance to defend her favourite character. And with that, it is time for me to go. Next time, something interesting. Be sure to be punctual! Farewell, and goodbye!

If need be, you might need that promotion. I think I'll be saying yes, if only because I'd rather covers bases if worst comes to worst.

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Oh, f*ck you SF! Stop randomly logging me out and deleting everything I write!

On 1/9/2019 at 6:40 PM, Dayni said:

Well what can I say except

giphy.webp

Muchas gracias senor!

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I've had some rather busy days, and my progress on the update kept on getting half-deleted in the middle of replying to everyone for some reason and I started to feel like I was trudging through the desert.

I swear, I know I said I like long replies, and I do enjoy reading them a lot, but you know this is starting to get a little out of hand when I spend days trying to get through all the darned replies and the update itself takes me one. Good thing this is just a rather short update.

Understandable. I've been thinking about cutting back on my replies as well. The last one took three or four hours to write (in no small part due to real life shenanigans and finding gifs I never ended up using), and I'd rather that not be the case.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I am not comfortable with that.

You got lucky that I can't edit the post. I would have added a picture of someone getting their face skinned.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Bah, no worries, really. Although, it really would've been a shame if this reply didn't come to exist. Man, did I laugh with this piece. While nervously tuging my collar, but hey, I laughed!

Glad to hear it! The laugh part, I mean.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

What can I say, Heroes was doomed to irrelevance when I downloaded an old favourite of mine for mobile phones. Pocket Trains, which I could never seem to be able to play for long because my phone always had terrible storage capacity and I had to remove all of my games incredibly soon, and my tablet was awkward to take to places and soon became a slowpoke as well. This new phone of mine, however, has plenty of space, so I've finally been able to enjoy the game fully. Really relaxing game.

I remember Pocket Trains. Been a few years since I last played it, though. Has anything really changed?

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Yes, yes I would, especially if it meant I would always be right when I said "nobody's going to die ever".

Excellent point. Even though it would apply to the enemies as well, but that just means the conflict can be resolved "peacefully".

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

That's... a little dumb.

Being fair, Grima is hinted to be just that powerful. But yeah, it's just an excuse to keep the game in the middle ages despite a thousand years passing.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I agree. Pretty much the only thing I know for a fact about politics is that I hate them and want them to influence my life as little as I possibly can. Given how important they are for society as a whole, it's a bit of a fool's errand, but I can try.

Honestly, if my ignorance is pardoned in some areas, I don't mind discussions about the pros and cons of governmental systems, or how they work in theory and in practice. Heck, I actually find it interesting how historical figures used politics to achieve something.

It's modern politics that I don't give a damn about. The general populace will complain no matter what happens, and politicians, even honest and just ones, are still pushing some sort of agenda. Makes it hard to root or care for any side.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Oh, God, that came out even more wrong!

Should I say instead that I am asexual, aromatic, can't tell what an innuendo is unless TV Tropes points it out, and every joke I make about s*x is to criticize it?

Meanwhile, I think I low-key traumatized my best friend when he asked me what I would do if I was suddenly attacked. There are a lot of ways you can kill someone with a plastic folding chair.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Sounds interesting enough.

It's a good indie game. I definitely recommend it. Especially of people who want a post-apocalyptic game that takes the survival aspect seriously and is tired of zombies or forced "humans are bastards" lessons (although grey morality is definitely still present, but more naturally than other examples).

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Unless she grabs her arrow and gently slices their eyes without touching anything else, I don't see how she could do that.

Well...

Spoiler

Warning that it is a Mortal Kombat picture

Spoiler

Image result for mortal kombat x kung jin x ray

 

 

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Well, no, but they do have an excuse.

Guess we'll have to wait and see what it is, then.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Not to mention, how would you handle non-lethal hits? Would the unit just break out of the snake's stomach like it's nobody's bussiness?

Er, um, maybe the snake would only bite the opponent, and swallow them as a killing blow?

I can see why they made it shoot a projectile now.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Hahahahah... how would you explain a town of rapists, thieves and corrupt politicians not having been burnt to the ground by anyone yet, then?

Lo Wang hasn't been born yet. Rapists are the only thing that can shut him up, and despite not getting to that part of the game, that's really saying something.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I don't blame it, I thank it.

It is a pretty fun song.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

It's understandable, but to be fair, it's given more of a focus here than it is, usually.

It's definitely done well in this game. I just wish that Fire Emblem dropped that aspect and focused entirely on the "fighting a war against an opposing nation" part at times.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

What do you mean, "glad to hear"? I just told you I'd disappoint you! Were you so blinded by your rage, you failed to read what I said correctly?

Glad to hear that he won't die peacefully.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Damn you for being the one!

I'm honestly surprised I was the only one to make the joke.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Frankly (heh), I can understand that the families of the victims wouldn't want a bunch of people saluting Franco's grave right next to them while they mourn the people he killed, but... is it really the most pressing issue in our country? Do we really need the TV to be talking about it every single day? Well, of course we do, because if we didn't have a distraction, we might actually realize that everyone in power is a corrupt asshole.

Eh, the news will focus on anything controversial as long as it brings them views. It's gotten to the point were I sincerely wonder if Trump intentionally says things so that people will complain about it, and while their focus is on that, he actually gets stuff done. Despite being neutral on the guy, that does concern me.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Those are the eyes of a man who doesn't know what's coming, only that he won't like it.

It was the second picture that popped up when I typed in "Death glare" and considering that Treasure Planet is my favorite Disney movie, I had to use it.

That is also a pretty accurate description of the picture and my feelings at that moment.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Why, you little...!

Mintz is awesome, but I will abuse his name whenever I see a chance.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Nothing. They just dance to the sounds of people dying and screaming for help and their mommies as they bleed out. Pretty sure that what Runan does, anyway. With a big, bright smile on his face!

Uh... I was going to say that I propose this as the fitting music, but okay.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

It was at around this point that, after three days of working on the replies alone and Serenes just eating my progress, I looked upon your and Dayni's bibles and my eye twitched a little. Forgive me if my replies seem a lot shorter from here on out, I was determined to finish this within ten minutes so I could start copying dialogue already.

That's fine. As mentioned earlier, I need to cut back on some stuff as well.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I don't understand what you mean by "reviving end".

The part that hurts.

I also spelled Katana incorrectly, and I wish that Serenes Forest would actually allow me to edit longer posts.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

What does sound useful, exactly? The 3 move with a very tiny chance of improving? The really late skills? The bad bases?

...When put that way, I see what you mean.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Wee! I'm not gonna get killed!

Why should I shoot the messenger? Especially one that doesn't like the message.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I'll... get out of the way before the inevitable explosion occurs.

Smart

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I believe saying something would only make things worse, so I won't add anything to this.

Wise

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I will save her, thankfully it's really easy to do. Nah, the hard part comes afterwards...

...I don't know if I want to know what you mean by that...

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

"Then"? His town is full to the brim with thieves, murderers and kidnappers while he sits on his square ass and lets Pavlov rob him and his peers blind! He never had a spine! Probably doesn't even know what a spine is!

Well, he only has a torso, so he that might actually be plausible.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I was in the same situation. A shame, I never got to experience all the "terrible hardships" and "moral dilemmas" everyone was talking about, I was rich the whole way through, so I could afford to do all the good deeds I was given the chance to!

Heh. I remember that the only reason I risked loosing the 5-star apartment at times was simply because of terrorist attacks cutting the day short. It's a game that made me think, and anything that does that will interest me.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

This is one of 'em, so it's good. Still, where are my growth rates, Kaga?

I still never understood why that information is hid from the player. Granted, I didn't mind it in games like Awakening or Echoes, due to how they handle availability, but in the other games in the series where that information matters, it's baffling why they never show it. Same thing with support points.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

I told you a thousand times, I was never going to be able to do much! The worst thing I could think of is beheading him, but decapitation's like the F word on TV: I can only use it once. In FE12 it was Nyna, in FE6 it was Merlinus, and here... who knows! I'll have to see if I can find my plates...

I mean, you could skin the face, have the eyeballs hanging out, teeth all jagged...

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

twhnfrc.pngFor years, I have placed my honor as a knight of Canaan above all else. But that's simply not possible anymore... So, Runan, will you hire me as one of your mercenaries?

xQunKTk.png I like how he casually refers to him as "Runan".

A staple of noble rogues.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

O1Or9E1.png

hTMofYU.png Hahahahahahahahah, amazing! You're so awesome sometimes, Runan. Not quite all the time like Eugen, but you're getting there, you're still

If Eugen is a claymore, Runan is a rapier.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

xQunKTk.png Two things. First, it's funny how Norton could potentially not be promoted at this point, which would mean he'd have no helmet to eat. Second... this is Norton's theme right know. Just this.

Fitting. Reminds me again  that I need to play Ace Attorney.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

And now I am reminded that I want to try out Star Fox Command, if only to see how well multiple endings in Star Fox would work. And to get an idea of what fanfiction soap operas looks like.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png Scratch that, actually, that theme isn't dramatic enough. Ergh... this one might do the trick.

Aaaaaaand I don't know what this is, other than Gordan Freeman.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

IfRBMws.png Oh shit, he made her cry! Norton's new theme is this!

Relevantly Irrelevant

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

0zFk3fj.png That was awkward... the really clever part about it is that now Norton gets a support from Kate, but not the other way around. Very fitting. Now, let's see if the next supportive moment is more supportive.

Honestly, both sides make good points, and it only makes me curious to see if either of them will be correct.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

Qd8087b.pngNo, but... Since there's tons of wine here, it's okay if I have a little bit, right? Just enough to feel what it's like?

Why would she want to be idiotic? That's what drunkenness does, and I see no reason why people willingly do that.

Then again, I am the guy that, if provided with alcohol, would instead make a motolov.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

mb9iL26.pngvkSFaCp.png

Y'know? Fire Emblem needs to start getting serious about animating air combat.

3 hours ago, Saint Rubenio said:

xQunKTk.png Oohh, boy, a choice! We can either give in to Sharon's guilt trap and "get a flute" (you don't often see Engrish in Aethin's translation, but there are remnants of it here and there), or we can have Raffin wave his old life goodbye for good and refuse. Since I'm not using Raffin, all this'll really affect is the endings, so let's play Shipping Emblem: do we screw over Sharon and have Raffin accept his new life as the son of Marlon, or do we make Esther's worst fears come true and have him abandon his new life to return to his old lover?

Of course, if I was using Raffin, this'd be a really mindless choice, because he promotes to Wyvern Knight if you have him accept the flute. Yeah, he promotes from Paladin to Wyvern Knight, and unlike the game's Pegasus Knights, he doesn't lose anything from it, not even magic or speed. The drawback is that you don't actually get a flute, so you can't just go "okay, I'll choose yes and then hand Garuda over to Martel" or something. You either promote Raffin or do nothing. I actually used Raffin all game once without promoting him. It was fun, to say the least.

But like I said earlier, I'm not using Raffin and I doubt I ever will, so pick your choice. Pretty sure I know what the result will be, but hey, I want to give my favourite mod a chance to defend her favourite character. And with that, it is time for me to go. Next time, something interesting. Be sure to be punctual! Farewell, and goodbye!

Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhh...

Heads you give the flute, tails you don't.

*Flip*

Whoops. It rolled under the table.

*Flip two*

Tails

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